meet_roger_dafremen Dafremen I Freefall Me by Roger Dafremen I took a ride inside to hide perhaps unwind inside My mind instead I find a precipice and jumping see in front of Me the darkest deepest widest hole I plunge on through and soon the view expands to open sky, antifreeze green all around and in between as I take in the scene or the scene takes in Me who KNOWS which it should be I don't ask, so in awe of the city I saw from my vantage point high in that hole in the sky I fly out as if being reborn Falling floating dropping dreaming beautiful, beauteous wonderful place seems almost like coming home where myriad nightmares feed alone on aspirations thoughts and dreams where hopelessness bursts at the seams now tears stream down My soul NOOOOOOOO! I flail my arms to stop my fall but pick up speed instead My limbs float lifeless, dead as I freefall inside My head Spires of fears now jutting out so sharp and clear while drawing near I fear, I fear this place TAKE Me from this place! SAVE Me from this place! but NO, the journey must go on Still on that ride inside My mind I take a breath My screams subside but echo off the loneliness that forms the valley down below a place I've grown to know and love that shelters Me that harbors Me from fear of plunging on How many times did I play in that place? in its empty embrace? at a Self defined pace seems that loneliness was My best friend guess We all die alone at the end they'll be lonely, I'm with an old friend guess the last laugh is Mine in the end I clear my head of bitter thoughts and stare in dread at fast approaching ground instead all the other things shown to me all so well known to me Nightmares and Loneliness Hopelessness, Dread all so familiar all here in My head but this ground seems a stranger as if unknown danger lies waiting for Me at the end Unfamiliar but, wait "No not THAT!" it's too late for the end of the journey has come though the fall through My mind wasn't long I slam into reality Done. - - 010522 ... Dafremen No Curtain Call by Roger Dafremen Not once did I among the few Call after you and hope to die To tumbled echoes rattling Along the ragged edge of sanity No band played on for you and I No credits rolled to our demise No clever sense of irony Did lend to our finality Sweet, sweet and blissful calm Whose waves wash to serenity And vanity is pushed away Instead deep insecurity Grim fears of hope of saving fate Of twisted once-upon-a-times Which menace my dementia This oft sought melancholy Now off with you, I did not call I do not wait, nor do we all Begone, farewell go to what awaits Fade into your happily-ever-after. - - 010522 ... Dafremen Nevergreen by Roger Dafremen Onward through the thickest fields of bluest evergreen choking back the loneliness grasping at breath inward to the darkest dreams of blackest isolation sucked deep into emptiness gasping a sigh Onward through the thickest fields of truest nevergreen reddened by the maddening of terror striking soul outward, ever gladdening whitens paper smile insistent ever saddening reaching out to die. - - 010522 ... Dafremen Juvenile Crime - My Thoughts On The Subject. by Roger Dafremen In my mental wanderings, I very often am suprised to find simple cause and effect relationships where others might see none. Similarities between apparently dissimilar situations or events. Patterns in seemingly unrelated, unconnected occurences and social trends. Such is the case now with the "hot button" issue of juvenile crime. What strikes me as absurd is the notion that a young individual's tendency to violent anti-social behavior is in any way a product of easy access to guns. I also find absurd the notion that our society would be more secure should we take measures to ensure that these disturbed youngsters are left without means to act out their violent impulses and fantasies. Should guns disappear from the face of the planet tomorrow, the disturbed mind would remain disturbed, the imagination left to devise other means and tools to obtain it's twisted objectives. A gun, or a well placed brick to the back of the skull? Dead is dead after all and violence is violence. Perhaps if anything we might only serve to deter bold action, instead replacing front page school shootings with more insidious and well hidden violent crimes which might go undetected for years ala Dahmer or Gacy. Is it logical to assume that dangerous individuals are no longer a threat once dangerous methods are beyond their reach? Pehaps, but for as long as the ability to wrap one's fingers around another's throat remains within reach there can, by such logic, be no end to the threat of dangerous individuals. A mind intent on violent action will find ample opportunity and abundant resources wherever they might be found. Do we legislate every aspect of the daily lives of the many in order to remove all potential for violent abuse by the disturbed few? Do we deny matches and lighters to all in order to avoid the destruction left in the wake of a disturbed pyromaniacal few? If we are ALSO willing to give up our stoves, water heaters, toasters, batteries and the like; all potential sources of destructive power for those inclined to seek fire as a means of fulfilling their aberrant fantsies. Such is also the case against the effectiveness of legislating the tools of the homicidal; it cannot hope to succeed and long after its dismal failures have become apparent, the average member of society will still live with the curtailed rights and diminished privileges(freedoms) that inevitably are the direct result of increased regulation. As history has shown us time and again, freedoms once relinquished are seldom if ever restored, even though the legislation and its original causant factors may no longer exist or threaten society. More often than not, they are cited as precedence for further restrictive legislation; acting as links in a chain of curtailed liberties. Each subsequent generation born under such legislation does not miss the freedoms lost, having never enjoyed the benefits which such freedoms and privileges afforded their predecessors. In this manner each lost liberty is seen by subsequent generations as but a small sacrifice in the name of the common good when in fact, it is simply another step in the long journey away from the freedoms enjoyed by our forefathers. Whenever we find ourselves giving up rights, liberties or privileges in the name of solving our contemporary dilemmas we must STOP! These liberties are not OURS to relinquish or regulate out of existence, they belong to all Americans, past, present AND future. We must turn our national heritage over to our children with all of the freedoms which were ours to enjoy and benefit from, intact. Secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves AND our posterity. This is the responsibility that is the cost of the privilege. Instead we must solve our generations unique problems without resorting to restrictive regulation no matter HOW reasonable the law or how honorable its intent. This is our duty as Americans, to preserve and pass on every individual freedom enjoyed by our generation to the next. The pattern, by the way that I have presented repeatedly now reveals itself as one which we find in the original subject of this letter, that of increasing juvenile crime. What I see is nothing short of this same well intentioned dereliction of duty on the part of Americans as parents. That no doubt seems harsh and extremely judgemental, it is both. I make that statement with a clean conscience however, since my understanding of the realities of raising and supporting a family is certainly peppered with moments of longing for the fulfillment of personal goals unachieved. At some point in our history, a child was born into a home with parental role models, some good, some bad. When all other things were in doubt, the presence of a parental figure was all but assured. Discipline was the rulebook and parental behavior the example. Society's complex and often unnatural requirements were taught in the relative safety of parental example and discipline, if nothing else was assured. This then was a benefit enjoyed by the child (like it or not) and a responsibility assumed by the adult (know it or not). You didn't have to KILL for attention, it was there, good or bad. Somewhere along the way American adults have stopped regarding home as that safe place for children to find security and guidance. Somewhere along the way it has become little more than a shelter from the elements. A combination phone booth, hotel and restaurant. It has stopped being the center of childhood memory and instead become a place to sleep and keep kids. Friends become family, sex becomes love and peer approval is acceptance. NO wait, peer approval becomes GUIDANCE. Somewhere along the way we forgot our responsibility to our children in our zealous pursuit of the "RIGHTS" of personal fulfillment. Somehow along the way we allowed breadwinning to become glorious and privileged while childrearing as a career is seen as backward and embarrassing. What FOOLS we have become. A nation of jackasses hypnotized by the empty promises of the almighty dollar and all that it might provide to our children, when in reality few of us have the guts or the noble traits of self sacrifice, patience and humility required to stay home and see to the social and emotional needs of our children. Right to procreate, responsibility to rear. We demand the former and all but disregard the latter. Is this an unreasonable point of view? Perhaps it is, but tell me working families, don't you find the idea of universal access to daycare appealing? More appealing perhaps than staying home with your 3 year old? Need the money do you? How much are you paying for childcare? Transportation? Lunch out? Work clothes? Does it even out after taxes? Single parent are you? Who left? You? Him? Her? Divorce? Wasn't that fantasy marriage you thought it would be? How long were you together? Did your parents stay together for your sake? Did they divorce? WHY DID YOU HAVE CHILDREN ANYHOW? Me, Me, Me, Me and more ME. I wasn't fulfilled. I needed more. I wasn't happy. MY life was unrewarding. On behalf of society I would like to thank you for providing a WONDERFUL example of irresponsible self gratification to your children. Thanks for leaving them to develop their OWN belief and value systems. Most of all thank you for refusing to accept YOUR part in the increase in juvenile crime, but after all, responsibilty isn't you strong suit...is it? You would blame it on anything that you could possibly direct a pointed finger at huh? Music, movies, guns, drugs, gangs, schools...THEY'RE all to blame. No they were just there when you weren't. Deal with that. - - 010522 ... Dafremen Glimpses of Things by Roger Dafremen You know it's almost unbelievable So damn close to incredible that I Can't seem to decipher the meaning. Yet I can't help but think that it's so Close to comprehendible that I just might be swallowed by the feeling. (Chorus) It's dark and night is closing in On light that here inside my brain Would flicker on if I weren't dreaming The starkly white glimpses of things That choose to hide within my brain Will drive me mad if I don't see them. (End Chorus) You know it's incomprehensible So damn unintelligible that it Numbs my mind and sends my senses reeling Yet I can't help but feel that it's So close to understandable that I can't stop my brain from almost screaming. (Chorus) It's dark and light is closing in Tonight right here inside my brain It flickers on and I start dreaming Then starkly white glimpses of things That once hid deep inside my brain Now drive me mad because I see them. (End Chorus) (Guitar Solo) (Chorus Finale) This part of me that's closing in Is slowly eating at my brain Until reality is dreaming And these white glimpses of things Seem to be one and they're the same For now in madness I can see them. (End Chorus Finale) - - 010522 ... Dafremen The Mote That Would Be A Mountain by Roger Dafremen Where is the greatness for which I pay So heavy a price, mortality? For what is a man on his dying day But what he's left posterity? Born fast to wax, then slowly wane An erratic moon in history Time, a succubus kiss, does drain My life away, yet leaves no glory. How will they remember me Who laurels never have adorned? Perhaps it is my poetry Which spares me from a death unmourned. - - 010522 ... Dafremen Time To Be Amazed by Roger Dafremen The TIME? It's not the time,it's not the time That's what I say And you're amazed. Not the TIME?! And then you cry so many tears You miss the years you've lost by counting all the days. What about the LOVE? It's not the time, forget the time Look at the years of love we gave, We've kept the promises we made But not the time For I'm your man and as a man I must have each and all the days To make you proud and earn your praise I look at you And I'm suprised to find your eyes Seem far away They're filled