desperate gaudior clinging moisture beads on his scalp as he struggles to forget aches to remember needs to repeat fulfills his destiny without awareness 000115 ... splinken hello? hello? hello? ringy ringy. oh. i need a nap. 000911 ... birdmad but not serious! 000911 ... birdmad if i ask you a simple question... (adam and the ants) 000912 ... melissah i grasp onto her as a shield, but i know once we get into the car, my father will hit me regardless. 020802 ... blown cherry I asked you for help and you turned away. Don't expect me to come crawling back to your side. 030615 ... alexis i only ever wanted to feel something, anything. i only ever wanted to find happiness, to be saved, to be needed. when did i stop caring about anything? when did it stop mattering how much i bled every night or who didnt notice? i only ever wanted to make myself feel again, to make it on my own, to shut the fuck up and deal with my own problems like you wanted me to. now im past innocent, past numb, what have i done? 030712 ... silentbob a_new_blather_project blather_mixed_tape please dear people, get_involved with this unifying blather music fun and game fest it will be orgasmaramic 030715 ... pete i can't see why you're so desperate to see me, or why i'm so desperate to stay away.. 050819 ... misstree you said you would send help and walked out of the room and i've been bleeding in silence, eyes wild, scared, trying to forget that the blood has slowed and not for knitting but for lack, because there's so little left, and i could summon the rats to my aid but the price is so high, and i could call on forces that shouldn't be bargained with but you said you would send help and now it's so quiet you can hear my hope shatter. 051102 ... anythingbutcryptic how i feel when i feel like im falling so then i take my pillow and scream into it and when i get up my neck aches and the drool slips from my mouth and i feel like a retard 080111 ... unhinged i think in her heart my_mother 's singular wish for me is to find a love to keep me safe. 'you will find someone. there is someone out there for you.' 'but what if he's stuck in a prison in afghanistan?' and she laughed sardonic . believe me mother, i used to take comfort in that old_wives_tale about how every heart has it's match somewhere out there. that if i wished hard enough on the brightest star, my prince would come. but i am beginning to believe with more of my heart that i am a modern day juliet....one little glimpse of love left to the bitter wind of cat_lady spinsterhood. the thought is gutwrenching and my brow is always furrowed and the sighs escape me ragged. my pillar is crumbling without anyone to put on it. i'll always love you more than you love me sad_but_true 080904 what's it to you? who go blather from