typhoid rage. happiness. despair.
(rage is a new one for me)
me twisted twined and tangled 001217
inannalu NO, NO, NO,
Twisted is reserved specifically for the big blunt.
milky go arround in circles
and stop when your heads turns to butter.
i might say...
gurlrider these twisted thoughts in my head..these undeniable emotions in my scrambled and confused...inevitably leading to my demise 010717
blown cherry twisted old heart
twisted emotions
send me to
in tears
every night
not important you say you have secrets to share
your life a wonderous tale
that I should listen again
for the story changes
from old lies to new
you think I believe
snared in half-truths
that I will stay
in your lies
in your life

I never cared about the life you led
and I know the life you lead
now, think what you may
it is not your twisted words
that bind me to you
but your twisted soul that I want to unfurl with understanding
disemble all you please
I don't need my ears to see the truth

I will see your soul
flying free and healed
till then I remain
so spare your breath
ashmanzhou (dismember emotions)
try to selfsame please them
but only nothing gone broken here
dead but thoroughly broken there
my selfsame death thrown together
short of everything souls rise free
x twisted x twisted. the feeling that all has gone wrong. its twisted. nothing and everything is wrong at the same time. sitting alone, talking to yourself, because you cant bear to think about the people you are trying to mask in the fictional life of another. all of its in your head. and its..just...not..real.. 040218
unhinged moaning doesn't mean anything to me
instant gratification
i can feel guilty about later
could you hold me?
as much as i hate it
i'm scared not to be alone
for all those stupid teenage
soap opera reasons
cause i want to be independent
i want to be strong
i can carry my own damn load
i can carry it just fine
could you hold me?
funny that you say
i'm crazy
the deception of my smile
means i can play it off
i'm so crazy
and i flip my hair
and stare at you
didn't you see me screaming?
funny that you say
i'm crazy
cause it's a focal point of my life
the deception of my well-placed smile
trying so hard to pull your attention away
from my well-placed scars
the smile twisted in my eyes
but on the surface it's just a smile
begging you
could you hold me?
Isaou Twisted inside of me
down deep
so deep
are too many emotions
that I can't explain
can't identify.
They're twisted
everything inside of me
is twisted.
So twisted
I don't know
who I am
Not knowing how to feel
not knowing how I feel
what's inside?
Or everything?
Too twisted to tell
sable tall, table, turpid. smell, serpent, scramble. angry, angle, axe. cable, creep, corrupt. saggy, slimy, sordid. magic, murder, morbid. fool, fail, phobia. ugly, understood, utopia. 080829
rah rope 081124
unhinged 'the destructive genius of the nation's secular gospel is precisely this: whether you succeed or fail, the myth of meritocracy is calculated to encourage you to look inward for the source of either outcome. if you attain great professional and financial reward, then that was all about *you*. the society is due no credit, nor the government, nor those who helped you along the way. as such, you owe nothing to anyone, and are surely not obligated to assist those who for whatever reason have failed to attain the same heights. and if you fall short professionally or financially, then that too was all about *you*. the society and its institutions are due no blame. as such, you are owed nothing more - not better schools, not better housing access, nor a neighborhood free from toxic waste facilities, nor affordable health care, nor a sufficient safety net when you stumble. you are on your own, win or lose. in the supreme irony then, one of the most foundational elements of the dominant american ideology - the thing that so often binds us together collectively, at least at the level of narrative - is the idea that at its core is the antithesis of a collective for all. our collective and community identity is actually *anti-community.* it is hyper-individualism as the essence of one's group identity, and ultimately keeps us pitted against one another. there are winners and losers, and one's goal in life under such a system is to make sure you are the former and not the latter.' - tim wise 181007
what's it to you?
who go