excuse andrea pardon me if my appearance is a bit...er rough...dirty...unkept...i've simply not thought of it nor paid it much mind as of lately. the way i look doesn't really matter when i'm lying in bed, sobbing my eyes out for no apparent reason besides the fact that i've started and i can't seem to find the off switch. my eyes are bloodshot and there are 8 pound bags under them that wouldn't be noticed if i returned to my dark room littered with crumpled kleenexes. my ratty, unwashed for days hair wouldn't seem so incredible if i'd stayed locked in my comforting space. i know these clothes are wrinkled and look like i've slept in them...I HAVE FOR THREE DAYS, SO FUCK YOU!!! it's 3:12 am and i honestly didn't think anyone would be at the store this late...early....I just wanted some mocha nut fudge ice cream. 991229 ... valis my dog ate it. and he'll eat you if you call my mom, you nazi. 000102 ... wailer I'm full of them...It's just nobody believes them. 000121 ... skiblu valis, I've quoted you on that :-) 000724 ... wind & rain i know the feeling been there 020209 ... wind & rain very nice, I like your style...do you want to read mine?? 020210 ... broken please excuse me i gave it to you and you broke my heart so excuse me for wanting time apart you grabbed and threw me to the floor so excuse me i dont want to see you anymore you broke all your promises to me so excuse me if i treat you differntly with you i live in constant fear so excuse me if i no loger want you here you threw my feelings back in my face so excuse me for asking for some space i stay up all night for you and weep so excuse me if tonight i want to sleep with you - pain i always felt so excuse me if i ran for help you are always so set on being right so excuse me if i lied to avoid another fight with i could never win so excuse me for not running back to you again from me you always found something worth taking so excuse me if i cant stop shaking with your strength you held me down and yelled so excuse me if i no longer feel compelled if i ever left you-you threatened to die so excuse if i take a moment to cry you made me drink liquior that was full to the top of the cup so excuse me if i left you for a second to go and throw up you made me so vulnerable and weak so excuse me if some strenght now i'll seek you constantly remind of what i lack so excuse me if i dont want you back please excuse me 040401 ... somebody my dog ate it 040401 ... sisyphus too young and afraid or too old and knowledgeable or maybe those, too, are the same. 051227 ... Syrope she didn't say it, exactly but somehow i know we're back to how we were polite 080602 what's it to you? who go blather from