x sad
infinite puzzle
unrecognizable pieces
things people ideas words
into broken hints at clairty
while new shapes
map what is missing.

the sea of bits
to fit and feel
to be whole
to end.
Mike Separate. Shaped to fit together and create the big picture that alludes us all. Fprced to shuffle in darkness and keep their secret. They no the truth. 011110
She's an ugly girl, does it make you want to kill her?
She's an ugly girl, do you want to kick in her face?
She's an ugly girl, she doesn't pose a threat.
She's an ugly girl, does that make you feel safe?
Ugly girl, ugly girl, do you hate her
Cause she's pieces of you?

She's a pretty girl, does she make you think nasty thoughts?
She's a pretty girl, do you want to tie her down?
She's a pretty girl, do you call her a bitch?
She's a pretty girl, did she sleep with your whole town?
Pretty girl, pretty girl, do you hate her
Cause she's pieces of you?

You say he's a faggot, does it make you want to hurt him?
You say he's a faggot, do you want to bash in his brain?
You say he's a faggot, does he make you sick to your stomach?
You say he's a faggot, are you afraid you're just the same?
Faggot, Faggot, do you hate him
Cause he's pieces of you?

You say he's a Jew, does it mean that he's tight?
You say he's a Jew, do you want to hurt his kids tonight?
You say he's a Jew, he'll never wear that funny hat again.
You say he's a Jew as though being born were a sin.
Oh Jew, oh Jew, do you hate him
Cause he's pieces of you?
j. kilcher
m. barlow I once thought that he made me complete. That pieces of him fit perfectly into the puzzle of my fragmented life. I have to ask myself now, why do I feel so confused? Why does my heart, whose pieces once connected perfectly with yours, feel so bad. I hurt, you hurt. I love you, you love me. Why can't it work? Why don't the pieces of our lives match up anymore? Love is so confusing. 020102
phil it's all the pieces we need that we can never find, that makes life intolerable. 030621
The Spork As for the "poem" at the top of the blathe, I do repeat:
emily post_office
tchiseen my heart is in 040421
love & hate Pieces of this puzzle,
they never fit for me.
Other people put them in place so easily,
without help from anyone, they complete it,
they make themselves whole.
But my puzzle,
my puzzle is different,
it cant be completed, it cant be finished,
it will never fit into place,
never sit nicely to make some pretty picture that everyone loves.
Her puzzle, she makes it look easy,
how i try to be like her,
having everything and nothing at the same time.
I try so hard but they dont fit.
I discovered something though,
my pieces fit in hers,
Her pieces fit in mine.
Perhaps she will complete my puzzle by lending me some of hers.
She could, she could make my puzzle whole.
But will she? I dont think so. My puzzle is not worth it, the picture it creates is something she doesnt want to see, doesnt want to believe in.
A puzzle of pure darkness,
one which no one wants to see,
one which no one wants to help create.
Little do they know, they created it in me.
My puzzle has changed, it is only darkness,
Only helplessness, only pain, only suffering, only lonliness.
Nothing more, and now it will never be.
My puzzle is complete when the knife tears my skin,
when the blood drains out of the wound,
when the life drains out of me,
when she is gone,
when she is not with me,
when her love for me fails,
so do I,
my puzzle has failed and will never be complete,
only the knife can complete it,
only the knife can make it what it is going to become,
a beautiful, picturess darkness that surrounds me, that surrounds her, that will surround us.
endo A crack is forming in my heart. It's getting colder. The pieces fall away, I think that it's over, I could never comprenend, Why you think, it's alright, to drain me from inside, while you're looking at the moonlight. 050328
.fallen used to give pieces of myself freely and joyously...tiny offerings of me to whomever seemed to need/want/enjoy it... so many pieces lost, either cherished and neglected... strength was there in that moment of giving... strength was there always...so much of mySelf is gone now... and now mainly I keep what pieces that are left to myself... rarely are glimpses even offered... only shadows dancing on the walls... that Me is gone and I haven't found the new Me yet... where will those pieces come from? ... where will the strength be found?... when will I give freely and joyously to whomever seems to need/want/enjoy it?... this stagnation is stifling... this plateau is of no comfort... the new pieces of Me are waiting... will these pieces glimmer and gleam?... will these pieces crumble and fall?... yes... yes... and more... hope (that fickle creature, she's had a hard on for me for years and loves the scent of fear and blood) is in the corner eyes smiling, do they mock me? do they urge me forward?... do I jump and fall...down...down...down....again... do I find a foothold and struggle upwards, onwards?...yes...yes... and more...
and freely those pieces will flow from me... unchained...
innocent insect gather the pieces up, nurse them back to health, set them free only to be found again 050715
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