choking unhinged i keep choking back tears falling asleep in the thoughts of you only because my synapses had been tricked with the beautiful narcotics he told me not to drink with they would have been flooded with pain you erase the hope in me drawing the simplest black and white picture of humanity stark open simple evil 010321 ... jenna ripeness can choke. maybe-it's-the-right-time-ness can close you in. new linens on your pillow can still smother. 020924 ... ferret i don't need drugs, all i need is the memory of you, a simple little reminder of how f*cked up the world can be, no, i take that back, not the world, the people in it. but that's not what i'm trying to say, you didn't know it but i did, i saw the end before you even knew about it. before he even knew about, i know before he told me. anyway, back to my memory, the memory of you, it's just like a drug, it comes with everything, the momentary sickness and the long-lasting effects as well. just once i wish i could tell you just how much you made me want to puke. but that's all over now. this is the end. 030301 what's it to you? who go blather from