cliff florescent light I'm scared to call Cliff, cause he might not want to talk to me anymore (not that he has any reason to stop talking to me, I'm just insecure), or he might think I'm a loser for being by myself on July 4th which will cause him to decide to never talk to me ever again or I might not have something to say and feel awkward or he might not answer his phone then I'll have to leave a message and I won't know what to say on his voice mail or he might invite me over and I don't have anything to wear cause I have to do my laundry or he might ask me some question that I don't know the answer to and I will feel put on the spot or I might say I'm bad when I'm feeling good or say I'm good when I'm feeling bad or say I don't know how I'm feeling which will make him think I am indecisive and then he'll never want to talk to me ever again because I can't make up my mind 010704 ... florescent light I called and left a voice message Hi Cliff This is Sheryl Call me back that's exactly what I said and it's been almost 24 hours and he hasn't called. Why hasn't he called? Why am I obsessing over it? He should have called me even if I hadn't called him. It hurts me that he hasn't. I'm scared he doesn't like me anymore. I'm scared he's avoiding me. When I know plain well that he's just incredibly busy and probably just hasn't gotten around to calling. Why am I being so insecure? A part of me says that I'm worth at least a phone call, if he can't do even that, he's not worth it- fuck him. I have these two sides fighting in my head- the one that says fuck him, I can find someone better vs. he's as good as it gets. I think it's because he doesn't really give me any signs about what he feels, if anything, toward me. He doesn't do all the gentlemanly things Doesn't buy flowers, he doesn't tell me I look nice, doesn't take me out, doesn't call. I would think he's not interested at all, but when I visit him, his smile says how happy he is to see me. And he usually seems sad to see me go. I hate myself for putting up with this, for allowing it to torture me so. 010705 ... nocturnal I'm 100% sure this will not make you feel any better, but I can guarantee that every girl (and possibly boy, but I can't say for sure) has been there in one way or another. we feel your pain. there's nothing worse than expecting something from a guy, ESPECIALLY a phone call, and hearing only silence. I wouldn't be surprised if women have had heart attacks over it. and I'd bet about 90% of the time, it was just cuz the guy was busy, or didn't get a message, or forgot to pay the bill and hence had his phone cut off. it sucks, and they'll never understand. anyway, my point is, you are not alone. 010705 ... florescent light oh my god. he sent me an email! I'm scared to read it I'm scared to read it I'm scared to read it This is the first email he's ever sent me. I'm scared to read it I'm not gonna read it. It's gonna say something bad, I just feel it. It's going to say- I can't see you anymore. I'm not gonna read it. 010706 ... florescent light I know this is weird, but I need someone to go into my aol mail. It can be acessed from www.aol.com. I will give you my password and username. you can read what he wrote me, and then email, or blather, me about if it is positive or negative. 010706 ... florescent light I know it's going to be bad. I saw him Monday night and now it's Friday and he hasn't called once. This is the longest period of time since I've known him that we haven't communicated via phone or IM. If he liked me so much he would have called. He has a cell phone. Sometimes he'd call on his way home from work or whatever. He has no excuse not to call. 010706 ... florescent light maybe I should just read it. I keep staring at it. If it says something bad, it says something bad. What can you do? 010706 ... florescent light I read it. it wasn't anything bad. It wasn't anything good either. He wanted to know if I was being sarcastic when I emailed him Tuesday. I had sent him an email that said 'your company is super.' and then he wrote me... 'is that sacasm I sense?' He mispelled sarcasm. Actually, he mispelled sense, too, but whatever. blah, I got all worked up for nothing. Stupid boys. If he's gonna email me after having not spoken to me for most of the week, he should have at least said 'Hi, how are you?' or something. An 'I miss you' wouldn't have hurt either, nor would have a 'When can I see you again?' 010706 ... kingsuperspecial cliff cliff bo biff never got it right. no singing Bingo, no cottoncandycuddles from pseudosheryl-psycolochloride and I'm her hunny-hubby-wabbit ha ha cliffy you dolt 010724 ... floaty don't go to Tenshadows Tavern at http://www.worldbroadcastingsystem.net Cliff reads the private messages, & bans people at random, the guy is on a serious power trip. 030909 ... me ummm doesn't even have voice mail. can't even get calls when he is on-line nor does he know anyone named Sheryl who'd call him. doesn't even have ban ability any more much less care enough about what people do in private on-line. does add that all ER clones like Warp1, ER, SC, Oracle all have the same ability to read pm's should they wish. As does every room owner on every one of the sites mentioned. is baffled by the complete psycho-babble. But hopes whoever wrote this got the help they needed. 031217 ... andru235 i stood there talking to the cliff "send me a sign, send me a glyph!" i asked about it's favorite food i asked if i was being rude i chatted with the precipice it said it thought i was a priss i said, "well, i've seen taller cliffs" it seemed we'd got into a tiff and so, although i meant to jump i left when it said i'm a chump why would i honor such a cliff by playing upon it my final riff? 041228 ... devilbunny I went cliff jumping at Deep Creek a few years ago. It's like an 80 foot drop. 061110 what's it to you? who go blather from