masturbation jeff the obvious - playing with one's self. often in a sexual manner. the less obvious - toying with someone else for your own enjoyment. both are common. 980905 ... ang ensures sanity in the "dry" spells whether it's months or years. trust me... 980918 ... charley who needs dry spells? 980920 ... Caine I think that lizards need dry spells. Do they masturbate? 980920 ... emily Its ok but, to feel someone laying next to you is so much better of a rush that masturbation. It just is a lil release of the building fluids. 990130 ... q autoeroticism 990330 ... simon Is something Josh Jones does very often. 991129 ... troy Who is "Josh Jones"?.. 991222 ... old hick I know it seems perfectly reasonable that jacking it will help you get to sleep that night before a big test. It'll relax you and send you off into dreamland in no time so you'll be well rested for the exam, right? If only life were that simple. The sad truth is it'll just keep ya up until all hours and the next morning, not only will you feel like shit, you'll also feel pretty fucking stupid... at least this is what my friends tell me. 000121 ... timothy the magic wasp not a random occurrence. happens more than once. 000122 ... kari my best friend over the summer constantly complained cause he couldn't get laid. when i told him to masturbate, he told me he couldn't because he always felt too guilty about it. he was catholic. fuck catholicism for making something as cool as masturbation into something bad. those bastards ruined Rob's whole summer. 000127 ... BoofPixie A girl's best friend. 000309 ... SomeoneElse Also known as maintenence. 000504 ... birdmad ritualistic. sometimes. when there's no one around to help me when i wan't to get closer to "god." whether or not i'm "getting any" (just because it's always ready) something about my new diet has caused my testosterone levels to shoot through the roof though i am straight i wan't to dress like a nun and call myself "our lady of perpetual arousal" Priappus enshrined 000504 ... fairydust everyone is so tight-lipped about it. my friends and i are very open i guess. every day at lunch "so, who masturbated last night?" lots of enthusiastic me's result from this. we all know each others styles, techniques, where and when. maybe that's a little too open. 000506 ... lump not so great when you do it to someone and come goes all over you. 000717 ... michael everyday sometimes threetimes sometimes more sometimes naught lately never need a friend to hold and caress not my dick 000717 ... moonshine liberation 000718 ... jennifer 122 Terms for Female Masturbation: 1. Flicking the Switch 2. Reading Braille 3. Hiking the Grand Canyon 4. Deep Dishin' 5. Sushi Party 6. Polish your Pencil 7. Ring for the Maid 8. Ride the Curl 9. Tickle the Mustache 10. Entering No Man's Land 11. Loob your Goob 12. Flying Manual (with hands) 13. Flying on Automatic (with vibrator) 14. Copying Georgia O'Keefe 15. Digging a Trench 16. Scrub the Cake Pan 17. Accordion Solo 18. Beating the Bush 19. Buttering the Potato 20. Performing for Mr. Swaggart 21. Combing the Brush 22. Flipping the Flaps 23. Launching a Class Probe 24. Searching for Spock 25. Muff Ruffing 26. Petting the Bunny 27. Riding the Wild Hand 28. Stirring the Cauldron 29. Tweaking the Twig 30. Strum 31. Push the Button 32. Strummin' the Big Open 33. Butting the Bead 34. Moving the Stone 35. Parting the Petals 36. Caressing the Kitty 37. Making the Kitty Purr 38. Clit Bliss 39. Clit Twit 40. Furry Fun 41. Fuzzy Fun 42. Finger Fun 43. Parting the Red Sea 44. Petal Pushing 45. The Sweet Slide 46. Buzzing 47. The Wild Ride 48. Southern Comfort 49. Enjoying a Little Southern Comfort 50. Navel Maneuvers 51. Blooming 52. Blossoming 53. Praising the Orchid 54. The Southern Slide 55. Taking a Trip south 56. Exploring the Deep South 57. Traveling Past the Mason-Dixon Line 58. Lady Fingers and Cream 59. Southern Seduction 60. Digitizing 61. Romancing the Rose 62. Ringing Southern Bells 63. A Little Southern Romance 64. Southern Pleasures 65. Buying an "E" Ticket 66. Making Waves 67. Fanning the Furnace 68. Mistressbate 69. Hoodwink 70. Juice It up 71. Jill-Off 72. Polishing the Pearl 73. Battery Testing 74. Setting the Oysters 75. Uni-Sex 76. Dating My Palm 77. Tossing the Pink Salad 78. Rocking the Little Man in the Boat 79. Tip Toeing Through the Two Lips 80. Petting Kitty 81. Finger Dancing 82. Playing Fiddle 83. Spelunking 84. Churning the Cream 85. Making Butter 86. Pearl Diving 87. Stroking the Snail 88. Shelling the Bean 89. Feeding Fish 90. Jump Start the River 91. Crossing the Swamp 92. Yawning 93. Invoking Venus 94. Four-lip Whistling 95. Playing Piano 96. Feeding the Other Mouth 97. Shooting the Rapids 98. Scuffing the Muff 99. One Hand Clapping 100. Harp Playing 101. Digital Special Effects 102. Flipping Through the Pages 103. Pitching in the Bush Leagues 104. Touch Typing 105. Making Bumps 106. Rolling the Mink 107. Spreading the Petals 108. Skimming the Cream 109. Watching the Butterfly Smile 110. Making the Oysters Smile 111. Pressing the Pleats 112. Basting the Meat 113. Tickling Her Fancy 114. Making Five Fingers 115. Going on a Finger Ride 116. Dunking the Beaver 117. In the Hand Cream 118. Greasing the Skillet 119. On the Waterslide 120. Doing Laps 121. Surfing at Finger Beach 122. Crossing the Great Divide From Blue Stocking, Summer 1994. Compiled by Pat Moriarty and Ellen Forney Blue Stocking P.O. Box 4525 Portland, Or 97208 (503) 241-4513 (Reprinted in Women Who Masturbate issue 6, summer '95, published by Theresa Kimm, PO Box 3690, Minneapolis MN 55403 Most Frequently Encountered Terms Used for Female Masturbation* By Men - 1. Fingering 2. Playing with herself 3. Frigging 4. Getting off 5. Using a dildo By Women - 1. Playing with herself 2. Fingering 3. Getting off 4. Feeling yourself *This second list of slang words was collected from sociology classes of all levels at a New England state university in spring 1990. The sample of 167 included 102 females and 65 males from the same state. STANDARD TERMS FOR MALE MASTURBATION 1 MASTURBATING 2 Onanism (A biblical term) 3 Playing with your penis 4 Playing with yourself 5 Beating your meat 6 Beating off 7 Jacking off 8 Jerking off 9 Stroking or stroking it 10 Stroking your cock 11 Stroking your meat 12 Getting a hand job 13 Whacking off 14 Shooting off 15 Wanking or Wanking off (Mainly a British term) 16 Getting your gun (Military term?) 17 Frigging 18 Friggin' your riggin' 19 Fucking your fist or fist fucking (but this last usually refers to anal or vaginal penetration by a hand) OTHER PURE VERB FORMS 20 Pulling your pud 21 Pounding your pud 22 Pulling your putz (Yiddish term) 23 Flipping off 24 Rubbing the wad 24 Smacking off 25 Jerking rod 26 Firing your peter 27 Spike your cock 28 Pop your peter DOING THINGS--ANIMAL METAPHORS 29 Milking the mouse 30 Sperming the worm 31 Loping your mule (A southernism) 32 Milking the bull (Another southernism) 33 Riding the bull 34 Whipping your turkey 35 Slapping the monkey 36 Stroking the muskrat 37 Chocking your chicken 38 Charming the snake 39 Making the hooded cobra spit 40 Strangling the goose 41 Making the rooster crow 42 Shaking the snake 43 Skinning the lizard 44 Ride the dolphin DOING THINGS--VEGETABLE METAPHORS 45 Popping your nuts 46 Pealing the banana 46 Rubbin' the nubbin 48 Juicing the plum (Very descriptive, I think) 49 Jerkin' your gerkin 50 Spiggin' the twig 51 Sap your woody 52 Juicing a woody 53 Spanking the stick 54 Shelling the bean pod 55 Skinning the onion 56 Slicking the slippery stick 57 Slicking your stick 58 Peeling the wand 59 Slicking the willow twig 60 Popping your cork DOING THINGS--MINERAL METAPHORS 61 Pumping a gusher (Obviously from the Texas oil fields) 62 Panning for white gold (From California?) 63 Getting your rocks off DOING THINGS--MUSICAL 64 Playing your flute 65 Tootling your flute 66 Pounding the pipes 67 Playing a tune on the pork flute 68 Ringing your dong 69 Playing the skinflute 70 Organ solo (or duet?) MEAT AND BONE -- Beating your meat (Not counted--repeat from standard) 71 Skinning the weenie 72 Bone it off 73 Bopping the baloney 74 Bouncing your boner 75 Slapping your boner 76 Boffing your boner 77 Slapping the salami JUICE & CREAM 78 Jazzing your juicer 79 Creaming your cock 80 Pumping up ball juice 81 Churning man cream 82 Letting loose the juice 83 Milk your dick 84 Making prick juice 85 Milking your doodle 86 Cruising for an oozing 87 Pumping the juice handle EXERCISE & GAMES 88 Rubbin' the rigid rod 89 Playing pocket pool 90 Four fingered shuffle (as opposed to 2 fingered shuffle; female) 91 Five fingered shuffle or 92 Five fingered exercise (There seems to be some disagreement as to the number of fingers used--but everybody has his own technique) 93 Pumping the muscle 94 Stiffening your noodle 95 Hand to gland combat (I also like this new term!) 96 Blasting a pocket rocket 97 Tickle your dick THINGS ABOUT PEOPLE 98 Irking the dude--Recently sent to me--I really like it 99 Flogging the bishop 100 Pleasing the pope 101 Spanking Elvis 102 Making out with yourself 103 Punishing your clown 104 Having a date with Rosy and her 4 sisters 105 An outing with Tom Thumb and his four brothers WORK? (Nice Work If You Can Get It) 106 Lubing the tube 107 Sowing your seed 108 Trimming your wick 109 Polishing your knob 110 Pumping the piston 111 Pumping the magic Jerkins' lotion handle 112 Popping a wad by hand 113 Cumming by hand OTHER 114 Jerking your joy stick 115 Jazzing your joy stick 116 Jacking your joy stick 117 Juicing your joy stick 118 Wet dream on demand 119 Having the urge for a surge 120 Cum in the air 121 Go to Bangkok or Come from Bangkok 122 There is also ABUSING YOURSELF--I've never understood why it's called that, since everybody does it and enjoys it so much! 000728 ... startfires it's a long lonely drive back to the city on weekends. thats all ill say. 001112 ... startfires hee hee. 001112 ... Barrett If you ever need a co-pilot... 001112 ... Thyartshallshant I wish more women would masturbate. If i could give every woman in the world one thing, you know what it would be? A vibrator. And they would love me. Millions and millions of womem would have there first orgasm because of me! Wouldnt that be great!?! Its actually sorta of a fantasy to me. 001201 ... Thyartshallshant again I feel bad for my girlfriend. We have a long-distance relationship, so we cant touch each other and give pleasure to each other. But I masturbate. She doesnt. Im getting pleasure and shes not. That makes me feel bad. Ive tried to convince her to finger herself, but shes reluctant. I wanted to send her a vibrator, but she said no. What should i do? 001201 ... Dr. Rhin If I may offer some advice here...first you need to discover why she doesn't masturbate? If this problem stems from her being taught as a child that sex is a 'dirty' thing, then this will take time for her, and patience from you, until she learns that exploring her body is a natural and healthy thing to do. However, if she is just reluctant from embarrassment, and lack of knowledge on the skill involved, then help her open up to you, in anyway you can, especially when you two happen to be together. Show her how to do it...and be patient. 001201 ... Dr. Rhin If all else fails, tell her to become re-acquainted with her Maytag. There's always the spin cycle baby! 001201 ... unhinged i'm too sick to masturbate right now...i just sleep all day long. you have no idea how much this sucks for me since i've been getting off at least once a day for the past couple of weeks which is a lot for me. i am a girl. i admit to masturbating. so there. sometimes nothing works better than your finger.....unless it's someone else's finger. 001205 ... grendel see: blathercriticisms (and maybe our responses too) 001205 ... god dear doctor- how can i get my wife to masturbate? she is catholic. is there no hope? 001209 ... Thyartshallshant I know the time will come when she will put her fears, and opposition behind her. She will open up to the fact that her body is beautiful, and its a wonderful thing to give pleasure to it. But until that day comes, im just short of being a happy man 001209 ... j_blue started when i was ten, maxed out by 12 most_times_in_one_day i would have to say like maybe 15 times in college i would take brakes between classes, go home and do it for a few hours 001229 ... damntheradiogal I dont finger i rub up and down really fast is that weird? sticking something up does absolutely nothing for me 010118 ... unhinged penetration with a finger is really pointless if you think about it... 010118 ... birdmad "lying all alone and restless unable to lose this image sleepless unable to focus on anything but your surrender tugging a rhythm to the vision that's in my head tugging beat to the sight of you lying so delighted with a new understanding somethin' about a little evil that makes that unmistakeable noise i was hearing the unmistakeable sou