lost
daxle I fought and I lost
Digital sunset
Too late

You and I are different
I care about you
More than you
About me
990707
...
Drennan in our folly we have tried to resurrect the god we killed, and we shall some day be destroyed by our own foolishness. 990928
...
amy for words, and lost in words. 991211
...
jennifer I float on a steady stream of unconsciousness, lost in the friendly hum of your heart 991219
...
ready2run wait a minute!
how did I get to this website?
mom?
dad?
are you on the same website?
if so, I think, we can chat
991221
...
deb i've lost myself,
it seems
i can't think clearly
can't speak truly
can't breathe easily
can't work naturally
can't stop thinking of the "maybe"s
can't...
can't or won't?

i dream in circles that never meet
themselves
000108
...
wesleann i lost him to taoism, and those obtuse buddhist stories with indiscernible morals. I lost him to the internet, and it's plethora of information. i lost him to the martial arts, to his love of knowledge, and his quest to find himself. i lost him because suddenly, I wasn't interesting. 000123
...
marjorie maze. you let me go in the maze. again. the lights flicker
inviting me to cling to the neon signs
and wait
hoping
until someone comes to see why the sign only says "hotl"
i'm covering the "e"
i'm waiting.
want to join me?
friends are made fast when you're both clinging to a neon sign
dangling precariously over a large precipice
i spent so much time with the precipice that i even named it:
"F I N A L L Y"
000124
...
marina left overly since ten 000509
...
tarin where you are when you try to find 000509
...
red i am waiting for darkness to come, so that i may seek out a white shining star and wish that i could feel like the way i do now all of the time 000512
...
uganda i'm completely lost for a new name. 000606
...
silentbob I used to take the song Amazing Grace literally.

Oh yeah, that's the song about the woman who got a cure for blindness and got found by the park ranger when she was lost in the woods.
000615
...
Anastasia up, look up
the buildings are so tall
sign points one way
but it means the other
people walking, talking
unaware that I am lost
amble, roam, wander
the roads lead to nowhere
when you don't know where you're going
your own ingnorance is the map
should I ask someone?
but whom
there's a person
Should I ask?
What do I ask?
That I'm looking to be found.
000803
...
the puppettron one can never be lost in a world of their own making. and if for some reason you exist in a reality that was accidently constructed by another self identity, you should now consider yourself beyond all hope.

drown yourself in the toilet, its the only way out.
001014
...
j_blue once i was unrequited, now i am lost.

i dont see the other two much at all. if there was justice to be had, its two edged pain has peirced the both of us, as i knew it would.

and i date a turtle, hm.
001113
...
Yogijinn I lost myself, I lost my voice and I am most pissed of about losing my sense of humor. 001210
...
Tiffa Excuse me, if anyone sees anything Gregg might normally post in, tell him he's lost. 8smiles* I miss talking to the boy. Got married and didnt even tell me, so he's lost and needs to be found. *smiles* 001216
...
JACKIE LOST MONEY
LOST FRIENDS
LOST LOVE

THESE THINGS CAN BE FOUND
BUT WHEN I LOST ME

I FELT LOST FOREVER
001228
...
deb an ocean of time
washes thickly over me
drowning these eyes in salt-
no wind to speed things along,
only tumultuous grey blue waters
saddened, as my heart,
to have to keep us apart-
each breath until you near
is more wild gasping
arms flailing about
in an effort to keep myself alive
if only to see the light
that appears in your eyes
when i near

take me from this place
and bring me safely home
to finally find sleep
within the warm shelter of your embrace

i plead with the ashy sky
begging for any wign of hope
but the sun hides herself
from my searching face

and then i see you
on some distant shore,
watching for me.
but you do not see,
you only weep
and i long to kiss those tears away
to search your eyes for
a hint, even,
of a smile-
010301
...
sillylittlegirl i am staring at your thank you note and i am no longer alone in this room... 010309
...
Bran-Flakes I am totally lost in life I can't find anything and have noting to do and am totally bored and yeah we will leave it at that 010311
...
lost lost inside her tanted smile agian. 010314
...
unhinged back to the black
when i was comfortable with being alone
looking at the scar_garden
and how it has grown
even when it started to grow
being in that auditorium
made me feel lost
reminded me of the days
when i had found myself
and the revelation that
those days have been long
gone
010314
...
vampers in you....lost in myself....lost in a dream.... 010325
...
Laura I was happy when I found him, in awe of his talent, led on by his charm, then dropped, just to be picked up by him again and used, I agreed to the time we spent together fooling around, and cried each time thereafter. Then I found love, true love, eternal happiness in these new strong arms, and he, the old flame, came crawling back, he said his dreams spoke of me, I said....... goodbye 010325
...
elisabeth where my mind is, lost in the confusion, lost in the world, i can't find it. I it is just lost 010325
...
abms im always lost 010330
...
Laura I am lost in everything around me now,
no matter how much I try to keep it the same,
It all changes so fast,
the things I needed for my security are gone,
I am hate the feeling of being happy yet sad forever and knowing that sadness won't go away,
that is life to me,
never ending eternal sadness,
jesus didn't was away my sins,
he must've forgotten me,
maybe I was absent that day from church,
it makes you think,
no wonder I am Jewish,
I'd give it all up,
my faith,
my sadness,
sadness which has become the best friend I've ever known,
always there for me,
never abandoning me,
leaving my trust so far behind in the harsh abrading words they yell,
like sand scratching my skin to bloody ribbons,
I am lost in my own mind,
I don't know who I am or they are,
I have no safety net,
I am jumping,
without a backup,
falling closer and closer to the earth,
I don't know what I'll find once I get there,
I've been gone so long.
010415
...
Casey Lost in her beauty

Lost in the mall

Lost in myself

Lost in my worries

Lost in my dreams

Lost in my nightmares

Lost in the world
010415
...
mmm i feel lost without her 010415
...
lost daxle prophesized my coming and created a page for me. How sweet. damn i am stupid, but its fun that way sometimes. 010430
...
Dafremen Your not really lost you know.
You're in self-imposed exile.
010501
...
lost yeah i kinda keep myself on the outside. I dont really want to be found. but the right person has found me, she just isn't here now. she wont be here till summer when she moves back. 010501
...
alegra i think i lost something i cared about. 010514
...
daydream believer help me.
please.
just look me in the eye,
take my hand.
don't lie.
understand.
010515
...
snow_angel Her mom saw my arm and Ask me what it was.."why do you have that on your arm." I thought for a moment, trying not to seem obvious. What could lost mean other than what it was. Should i tell her that I cut my arms to make myself feel better? SHould I tell her that Im lost and that's exactly what it means?
"Its a nickname" I blushed...Ashley sort of laughed.
010605
...
lost i used to cut myself to feel better to try and regain what i lost. then i realized i cant reclaim my childhood. i am supposed to act more adult like. i cant just revert back and act like a child again. its gone and i just have to deal with it.let me explain because if i dont somone is going to say that i didnt really lose it. when i was a kid my biological mother was on drugs and i would have to feed myself and she wouldnt eat so i had to try and feed her too. many times i would go without food for weeks. 010621
...
sam poo.

can't seem to find where i put everything--maybe the solution is to stop looking.

we are all so confused.

i am not a proselytizer.

three days ago i was walking down the central street in my city i live in the city like all the other cities--saw you walking too but hey it's the street and walking is done so that's that.

return to home wait you're already there. true enough, goodnight.

poo.
010621
...
tit
and because my body cannot leave,
my mind must travel on it's own
it searches for happiness
but i fear,
that one day,
it wont be able to find its way home
and there i will be,
a trapped body and a lost mind
010707
...
BioHazzard Between two points I find myself,
Lost in what I see as an eternity,
Fighting what I know for shear confidence that this is true reality
Something has stopped me to think ages ago
Now I search for the truth endlessly
Here I stand wondering where I am
Between two points I’ll never see,
I have no legs for I stopped feeling them decades ago
I have no pain do to this void I feel in my chest
My soul is gone, I could never see it, but now I know it's not there
Time is a never-ending process of never ending space
Eternal time and space I will never see an ending to
But yet somewhere beyond the horizon I hear it calling
From the distance of uncountable life times it finds a way to reach me
It sounds so close, but how far can multiple eternities be anyway
I vaguely remember when I started; I doubt I’ll ever see the end
Somewhere in the distance a secret has been waiting for me
An eternity is ready to take its toll
And here I stand, Non-eternal me. how will I get there, how will it be
010914
...
distorted tendencies Within the swirls of confused pain
Wishing it would go away yesterday
Wondering why it is so progressive
Wanting you to cure it
010915
...
youll find out I lost two great friends over the summmer. I guess when you don't see them other then once a week, itis harder to stay friends when you get older. I love you liz, and laurel, i always will. Stay friends and stay happy 010917
...
adara the word lost. tis funny is it not, that people use it for so many purposes.
well, i'm lost.
i have lost...
and i have lost
because i lost
and i dont want to remember why
010918
...
lost exactly 010919
...
Zy I lost my monkey 010920
...
xoch lost her center of consciousness that generates thoughts in april 011001
...
this is what u get when u mess with me phew-for a minute there i lost myself i lost myself 011010
...
psychobabe eh, sometimes i get lost in so many things. Lost in emotions, lost in repeated routines, lost in your arms, ahhhhhh why must i put myself through that? its all so confusing! mind boggleing! and i just want to understand how you are and what i want out of this! when all i can do is look you in the eye and tell you how i feel and cry. Crying cuz i'm lost in this lie of a world that was given to me and

*sigh*

lost in this...."world" this place i call home..lost in your world of given hatred forced out upon me...I cant look at you anymore, not at you in the eye it doesnt work that way anymore. I am lost in this and if i am damned to this till eternity....then i am taking you down with me to be lost..
011020
...
Rhinna me. 011031
...
ozzy ..and found and turned around by the fire in your eyes!.. 011203
...
Toxic_Kisses ...for words 011218
...
ClairE highway

or love. I know that you get lost sometimes...

You have to belong somewhere before you can be lost.
011219
...
john lennon there's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be 011219
...
Boymansonbowie1 hang my head and keep walking
close my mouth and keep talking
i look up to see your face
and realize i'm lost in this place
lost my soul and lost my mind
lost all hope of any kind
it's confirmed, and i always knew
the best thing i lost was you.
011223
...
daxle it's strange to find blathes I invented several years ago
I don't even know where to start in explaining how what I said was wrong
but it has to do with perspective, and being like cling wrap to your significant others
and love lost
011223
...
hannelore I want to be lost in your dreams.
I want to be deep inside of you.
How can I get lost, if I can't even find you?
020103
...
kerry somebody find me. 020103
...
Miffey Boy, am I ever
Oh well, it makes for good poetry
020105
...
mcdougall here i am again lost in this confusion
i dont know what im going to do
i dont know what's going to happen
i like her
she likes me
she's dating this other guy
she likes him too
he is a great guy, seems really nice
i kissed her!
she kissed me!
we are suposed to just be friends
i hate being lost mentaly and emotionaly
020130
...
etoile not all who wander are lost 020130
...
syncratick how long can a person be lost in their own mind? a month...a year...a decade... i'm heading toward decade. i would look back if i could. 020217
...
Thugstylez Ive lived in the land of the lost ever since i was able to make my decisions. Not knowing where to go or what i wanted i clung to the other lost souls. I found myself. I knew who i was. I was a misunderstood lost soul who found refuge with others like me. These people understood me. But this haven was short lived. With this crowd their were no friends...only aquaintances. Only an understanding. And that understanding was that we were all lost and would step on who ever we had to to find ourselves. Looking for a friendship I was stepped on over and over again and eventually stomped into the dirt. I had nothin left to lose since my soul was already lost. I died. Stomped into a ditch by others like me. Never knew a real friendship. Im now dead looking to be resurrected. Can I find myself reincarnated? Or am I to wander lost for eternity? 020227
...
i miss you
i've lost you
but i never 'had' you
("he was never mine to lose")

i miss you
but never was i with you.


strange, isn't it.
020312
...
me Lost... Don't you sometimes think the only usefull reason for your existance is to serve as a warning to others...

Blimey!
020411
...
Me thx me i wont tink it. 020412
...
Invisible Butterfly years ago i lost my soul...i want it back...but maybe i didn't exactly lose it , i gave it away , and maybe i dun't exactly want it back , i just want u to treat it alil better. 020528
...
Liz am i...

...Losing...
...Obstructing...
...Suffering...
...Tormenting...

not sure... but i'm lost....
020629
...
blown cherry I feel like I've lost you again.
I don't even know whether you're mad at me or not, but I feel the risks are great.

I've lost you so many times, over and over,
though I never had you to lose in the first place.
I've lost you so many times that I don't even feel like crying this time.

I'm so tired of this tug-o-war.
I don't want to lose you, ever.
But if you're never mine I guess that's not a problem.

I wonder if that blathe by "I miss you" was by me, or by someone else?
Can't even remember that.

lost cherries, lost marbles,
lost me in my thoughts of you
020716
...
Rower1 Lost without My soulmate...shes only gone for 2 weeks. Its amazing that one person has left my world, and i feel like nothing. No one can compare to her. Life without her is not worth living. Miss you Baby. Guess i should be happy i actually have someone to miss. Shit happens. Im not over it. 020804
...
Perspective_Of_Soul I know not who i am.
I doubt i ever have.
All i see when i look back on this sad existance that is my life is the pain, the suffering, the overwhelmingly vast waste of it all.I feel as if i am walking down a dark tunnel that i see no light at the end of.I have been lost here for so long that i fear if a light was to shine, i would find myself blinded because of it.The darkness embraces us all at some time or another.
The candle of hope i have, flickers in the breezes of my reality.When the light shifts for a moment, fear and sadness leap into its absence constantly reminding me that it shall always be there, waiting.

Waiting for the moment reality destroys the shimmering of hope.
Waiting for the inevitable breath of sadness that shall end the need for its light.
Waiting for its chance to engulf me forever.
020815
...
sic If there were no blood in my lungs, and the whisper came? Would you be my salvation?
If I were beaten incessantly with sand torn hands? Would you offer sympathy?
If I took the whimsical leap toward the plateau of knowledge? Would you look at me different?
020918
...
~gez~ lost in a world of joy and frustration. joy, because i am with you in one sense, but fristration i can't be with you in another 020919
...
jamie I don't know which way to go. Should I go? Should I stay here and be found. 021011
...
*silent screams It hurts to think, hurts to touch, hurts to blink, to breathe, to hear. Everything just hurts and nothings in sync with anything else and i feel like i can't do this anymore and just wanna give up, yet know i can't and i feel to much, yet i can't feel anything. i'm overwhelmed by confusion, and confused by everything around me. I hurt, i don't do anything to stop the ache. i'm numb, i can't feel anything. The feeling is consuming me from the inside. I can't think, there's to much on my mind. I need yet don't want. I want but can't possible need. I'm so lost, i'm stuck. Heavy air is forcing me through to ground. I'm shaking, i'm motionless. Nothings right, stop this. I'm in a bittersweet world of love and hate in which i'm consumed by the nothingness of confusion, yet i know, but i want to be blinded, i can't do this, all i wanna do is stop this. 021207
...
Chilly D If your're readin' this, then I finally did it
Sorry I didnt say goodbye, there was no time
Understand I was stressed
Livin' day to day was hard,
And I gave it my best,
But there was nothin' left for me in this world to convince me to stay,
Now I'm long gone away
030112
...
carbonunit the way that I feel when I am not alone 030305
...
Rael Why do I feel so lost. am I ever gonna find the place where I can belong? I want a home. I want friends. Is that really asking so much??? 030312
...
elocin I am lost and can not recall asking to be found
Did I ask you here?
Who asked you to be my savior?
I need no savior.
I don't know that I can be saved
But if I can
I am sure you are not the one for the job.
I am the only one who can save me
If I choose it.
So turn around and walk away
Because I didn't ask you to come here.
I didn't ask you to pick me up
I didn't ask you to take me off my cross
That's it, leave.
Don't come back till you can be lost
and can't recall asking to be found
030502
...
Grace Consider it done *s 030502
...
lost i'm so lost in this dream of a life. now that i'm finally finding myself, i'm more lost than ever. maybe they were right. who i am without him? without anyone? i'm me...but who is that? i'm finally on my own, with the freedom to find that out, but why him? why now? i know it doesn't mean anything, but i still feel lost. i don't want to feel dependent. i'm ME. that's all i am. that's all i want to be. why do i always have to be somebody else? i'm sick of being somebody else. i'm lost within myself, within his eyes... 030617
...
sean not sure what i am anymore
not sure what anything is
got a bit uncertain somewhere on the trip, doesn't mean anything anymore
030712
...
ferret lost and solemn
poser
looking for my own way
finding nothing but failure
oh well, perhaps i'll find it tomorrow
030712
...
xXShadow_GoddessXx Am I lost? Do I know where I am at? Have I ever...
Do we as humans know where we are, or are we lost within ourselves too deep to even fathom where we really are?
Have we hit rock bottom and been left to only dream of a truer reality of past years gone? Or are when inside of our dreams which have become out reality?
I feel I am lost, forgotten deep within the darkness of myself...
030726
...
the nights child lost and forgotten in the darkness 030727
...
lost lamb everything i thought i knew about you has been lost. everything i thought i knew about ANYTHING has been lost. lost in your eyes, your hair, your hands. lost forever and never to return. 030913
...
lost i lost her
and now its just me
but now i realize it was always me
no one ever loved me
it was just plastic
030922
...
lalagirl i was happy
truly happy
for the 1st time in 9 years
and i lost it
how could i lose it?
but its gone
and all i have left
is a dull
sickening ache
031017
...
Freak The autumn days swung soft around me, like cotton on my skin
But as the embers of the summer lost their breath and disappeared
My heart went cold and only hollow rhythms resounded from within
031103
...
ren It says it was a cold day, but I donīt remember shivering before it spoke.
I couldnīt stop after, though.
And I remember thinking Ļnow where do I gobut getting no answer, even from myself.
And all I could think over and over again was that I was lost. I could walk back, or start walking foreward... I could probably go in any direction I saw. But. . .

I see no direction. I see no foreward or backwards, I just donīt see anything, I just feel the anger, because of what it said.
I called out for days, or months, or minutes. I screamed as loud as I could, I even wept. Then I started throwing things, like rocks and branches. I fell to my knees and started pounding the ground, and shivering. And I remembered it said something about being cold; and I wanted to stop shaking, but I couldnīt control myself.

I heard it walking around here the other day. I ran behind a tree, then inside a cave, and hid. I knew it would try to hurt me again, but I will never let it find me. I am as lost to it as I am lost from the world I once belonged to.
All thatīs left is the cold.
031107
...
Whitechocolatewalrus We all die alone, but that's okay because I am a lost child. 031107
...
scorpion heart what is it about lost,
it drew itself to me,
i click, i feel impulsed to write.
but about what?
i feel lost, yeah, but how to explain?
lost in math, duh, but the feeling-
the feeling its whats so confusing
what hurts so much, swirling, losing that precious control i once had.
shaking my head in anger as i fail yet another test or stare at a problem with disgust. surprising how this one subject can tear me apart. but it makes me feel so-how to say it? hollow?
ripped up, each piece of me,
ripped into shreds as the grade drops.
031120
...
seeker each day is another step in this journey some call life
why am i so lost
maybe in the midst of my search
i will find another as lost as me
and we can keep each other
company
031205
...
ambermoon sometimes late at night i come here and get lost in all your words.thank you. 040109
...
kegger Where ever you go, where ever you are. You seem to be missing, unfindable. Somewhere you really dont want to be 040112
...
brittney I find myself scrambling for air again. Unbroken skin. 040115
...
lost why does it feel like the world is spinning and im stuck on the edge unable to get into the rhythm everyone else is following. Do these people even think about the meaningless lives they lead everyday. they spin into nothing. i need something to beleive in. 040305
...
wonderful why does it feel like the world is spinning and im stuck on the edge unable to get into the rhythm everyone else is following. Do these people even think about the meaningless lives they lead everyday. they spin into nothing. i need something to beleive in. 040305
...
PrEtTy LiTtLe PrInCeSs Not knowing what to do,
Not knowing what to say,
I'm lost here without you,
While night turns into day.

You left me all alone,
When I got rid of Dave,
I called you on the phone,
We had nothing left to say.

Your damn boyfriend is a liar,
But you refuse to see the truth.
I want to light something on fire,
Or knock out someone's tooth.

I miss you a lot, Laura.
You don't seem like my best friend anymore...
Would you come out to play,
If I came and knocked upon your door?

Or would you stay inside,
With your ugly, mean, fake friends?
I wish I could hide,
I wish this pain would end.

Alone I sit tonight,
While you're probably out with them.
I don't want to fight,
But our friendship you condemn.

You try to "fix" this problem,
Too bad it's not working.
And now I must write this poem,
To try and keep from hurting.

I guess that I must,
Give up on you.
And the friendship and the trust,
We've built together, too.

Goodbye, dearest Laura,
You meant so much to me.
I must now go search for a
New best friend, you see.
040311
...
LateForTheSky my first blather
and a worthy word

here we go . . .
040313
...
Rachel Does anyone have a map?
I can't seem to find my way out.
These puzzle pieces
(So oddly shaped)
Decieve my steps and
Make me lose my place.
~
040324
...
FORK im so lost in other peoples thoughts i cant find the page i want. Isn't it wierd how the only way to find Lost is to get lost again in the first place? 040331
...
ethereal I am so afraid of being lost. 040413
...
somedaysam i can't seem
to navigate
this map of words
where do i go
from here?
040415
...
PrEtTy LiTtLe PrInCeSs i HATE being lost! 040419
...
misunderstood the worst feeling in the world..being lost but then again i think it would be the most amazing thing to be lost w/HIM..in the middle of nowhere just us two. Cool' 040425
...
Babyblue I feel lost all the time, being in the crossroad, without knowing where I am.
I need someone to lead me, guide me.
040428
...
when darkness falls still lost, don't know what's going on... trying to put my life back together but everytime i start something else gets fucked up... 040512
...
katie everyone is lost, but no one more than you. lost in the world without friend or foe, wandering like a river, meandering in and out of conciousness 040528
...
katie everyone is lost, but no one more than you. lost in the world without friend or foe, wandering like a river, meandering in and out of conciousness 040528
...
obvious and found 040528
...
mood ring im going to cry.
because now i have lost you.
and even if i come visit next year, it wont be the same. we wont even know each other anymore.
maybe you'll be really different.
would you have the same smile?
would you act the same way?
could i still make you smile?
now, i think, if i could do these two years all over again, i'd swallow my pride, follow you like a lovesick puppy.
because pride aint worth shit,
and im losing you.
040529
...
t.r don't you say you're lost...
can't you see I'm trying to find you?
041006
...
ofsuch go find it 041006
...
insane_child you found me! YOU NEVER FIND ME! YOU NEVER TALK TO ME ANYMORE!! 041006
...
mullet Wasting my time wishing you would come watste your time with me. All feelings i felt are lost inside me trying to escape. Come waste your time with me. 041020
...
Laura I am.

I don't know where I'm going,
I don't know where I want to
041114
...
Laura go. 041114
...
tr i made a map for your mind, so you would not get lost over and over again.
but as I wanted to give you the map, you smiled and I saw the change...
041218
...
rage why am i here
what the hell am i doing
why do i feel like im missing something
Why do i have such a strong need for something i evidently dont have
why am i craving something to fill this hole?
how come im never satisfied
why do i panic whenever i see him
why do i care?
050320
...
belly fire it feels good to be lost in these many words, maybe you can't keep track of me here
I miss red
but I can't go back

the sea swept up to save me
a sea of my tears
and washed me clean again
I opened my eyes to blue
050503
...
*Amy* I feel like I cannot trust my friends anymore. but, do I really need them? do they need me? are we all alone in our lives? 050503
...
*Amy* I`ve lost myself 050505
...
camille once i found my inner self, i became lost 050506
...
icy and nowhere left to fall... 050729
...
whatever I wrote something on blather almost a year ago. I just spent forever looking for it. I don't even remember what the name was that I wrote it under. I feel like I lost something important. 050816
...
whatever I wrote something on blather almost a year ago. I just spent forever looking for it. I don't even remember what the name was that I wrote it under. I feel like I lost something important. 050816
...
love is staged words move your hand across the string. slips from your lips like those salty kisses. dressed up in a hollow beat not heard but felt. tonight i'll sleep in comfort of my own, blue not grey. tonight i'll die in dreams of your own, lost not love 050909
...
boboramma hmmm.... i'd like to speak of the one i lost, but the words, it seems, are lost ...... 050930
...
no reason where was i? i lost myself. 051013
...
jordie when I was a child I lost my doll.
I remember her lifeless eyes - cold, black, vacant and staring.

I remember her hair - stringy red yarn, slowly unraveling, the tips frayed but soft. I remember losing her and feeling some sort of strange relief I did not understand.

when I was a preteen I lost my ignorance.

I remember the sensation I felt when I realized I was a person too, like my parents, my president, my teacher.

That I had the power to make my own desicions. rebel against what I didn't believe in. And I felt some sort of strange relief that I did not understand.

when I was full-fledged teen I lost my innocence.
I remember discovering alcohol, and later drugs. I remember understanding sex - loving it.
And I felt some sort of strange relief I did not understand.

And though I feel lost when I think of death, I somehow believe it will bring some sort of relief I will not understand.
060519
...
Locke "I was wrong" 060527
...
Television That show is a game. In the story, and in real life. The true purpose of it is to see how long people will continue to watch it every Wednesday night, despite the fact that it doesn't make sense. In other words - It's the perfect TV show. 060823
...
f god! i think i'm normal these days anyway.
maybe its because i've been out of the country for so long....

everyone is looking really weird.
there was this girl with devil horns, pink hair and a batman backpack!
- well i'm sorry but i don't normally come across people looking like that down my street. I wanted to ask her why she looked like that but .. then i thought no i can't do that .. it must be me having another culture shock or something.

then later on .. i saw this motorcyclist... in full leathers... he was wearing a pirate patch over his eye... now for fucks sake .. this place is more shocking than India... what is this place freak land or something.

theres loads of really weird things going on around me ... i have not taken acid or nothing.


this place has changed so much.
India seems more normal to me.
070220
...
f god! i think i'm normal these days anyway.
maybe its because i've been out of the country for so long....

everyone is looking really weird.
there was this girl with devil horns, pink hair and a batman backpack!
- well i'm sorry but i don't normally come across people looking like that down my street. I wanted to ask her why she looked like that but .. then i thought no i can't do that .. it must be me having another culture shock or something.

then later on .. i saw this motorcyclist... in full leathers... he was wearing a pirate patch over his eye... now for fucks sake .. this place is more shocking than India... what is this place freak land or something.

theres loads of really weird things going on around me ... i have not taken acid or nothing.


this place has changed so much.
India seems more normal to me.
070220
...
krupt could the kruptone be explained in any other way? i am lost... falling into a sea of black, where once depressed, once happy, once confused, and once everything else that could be felt... i am just fucking god damn lost!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 070613
...
kuffsleeve REDICULOUS!

why are there hundreds of bloody different bottles of ketchup? meeerrrr...

i don't effing care what its called or how much the difference in price is... i just want effing ketchup, why make me stand there or ten minutes just to confuse me, and now i don't want effing ketchup, i don't want anything.
070614
...
no reason i'm getting swallowed up 080108
...
anythingbutcryptic 'what do you think?' he says sharply. he doesnt know what hes doing. he feels confused. he doesnt know how he got there. here. anywhere.
'i dont know...' she shudders, shes not the only one lost. and now she looks at him with disgust. but thats ok because he hates her too, her voice, her smell, her face, her mouth when it moves when she talks when it moved when he kissed her? is that what boys think? i dont know. im a girl. i know what i want them to think, sometimes, but thats not the same thing, is it? anyway, felt mountain by goldfrapp is playing in the background. but that fades out. everything. to black. everything gone. gone now. im sorry. im sorry for myself. not sorry for you. self pity is so lovely sometimes.
080126
...
you dont need to know my name i lost this site and all that it meant to me.

i used to stop every day at least to view the new scribbling on the abandoned walls, i used to laugh about what i read, i used to ponder about what others contributed, i used to cry over what i read and posted, i delved into various blather historical moments, i got lost more than once in the hedge maze, also in the city, and i even used to explore the mysteries of red.

i dont know if i want it back. i dont know if the wonder will still be there, and if it is i dont know if i truly want it.

i used to get here and i want to again, but i dont know if i can.
080827
...
you dont need to know my name i lost this site and all that it meant to me.

i used to stop every day at least to view the new scribbling on the abandoned walls, i used to laugh about what i read, i used to ponder about what others contributed, i used to cry over what i read and posted, i delved into various blather historical moments, i got lost more than once in the hedge maze, also in the city, and i even used to explore the mysteries of red.

i dont know if i want it back. i dont know if the wonder will still be there, and if it is i dont know if i truly want it.

i used to get here and i want to again, but i dont know if i can.
080827
...
dosquatch If you are a dreamer,come in.
If you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar, a hoper, a prayer, a magic-bean-buyer.
If you're a pretender, come sit by my fire, for we have some flax-golden tales to spin.
Come in!
Come in!

posing as Shel_Silverstein
080827
...
In_Bloom I lost my voice
I lost my nerve
I lost my balance
Only the crooked grin is left to deflect from my eyes that don't want to see the truth for right now
081028
...
rhin besides survivor, lost is the only other show that i watch. i'm not sure why i'm still watching. it gives me a headache. after the 6 left the island, the producers began tripping. i think i continue to watch because i want to see just how far they will go with it. 090517
...
Jay I am lost without her 100302
...
no reason i feel like i've already lost so much 100503
...
Ouroboros small source of joy, takes me out of myself. 110413
...
iPsycho =me 120123
...
Lost Lost again 170228
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