torn psyki now i am torn. i can't trust myself again. my picture is torn. be my friend. 000205 ... deb i am just a butterfly with torn wings tonight fluttering in pain falling fast to broken ground willing it to tear me to shreds for it must surpass this sunken hole my heart has swollen and deflated to become i love but what of that-? nothing seems to matter as it is anymore no matter how high my hopes may fly 000210 ... birdmad like an old sweater 000427 ... miniver Eight-billion roads diverged in a yellow wood. 000427 ... doggy Dear god (and santa claus and enya) Thank you. Thank you: for there are no Natalie Imbruglia lyrics here. 000428 ... deb how can my heart be so cruel so cold to those i love; admire; adore-? how can it be i am pulled so between two jewels, each bright in its own strength, reaching for me to hold and make all the brighter-? one loves wholly, truely, the other needs, but cowers in the dark sadness of that which he threw away. one close, one far; both equal in distance of the heart. -both lost- i long to pull the two who would hate each other from within their own musty hearts- -i long to embrace and grow something glorious with each, yet, there can be only one. -how do i choose who to hurt like that-? 000803 ... misstree the shirts are a bit tattered at the sleeves, these days... all the costumes fading, falling into the past, being left on the side of the road. i never want to let them go, but just like you, and you, and oh god you, they all just fade, and memories fray, and eventually they'll all end up somewhere else, somewhere but here, somewhere but slung around my body, my armor, my costume, my home, my life. 020413 ... silentbob i want to stay and experience every molecule of you. but you don't want me to. so i want to move three or four hours away where i can forget my own name again. but your face just feels like home. 020804 ... muwahahahaaa natalie_imbruglia 020804 ... slothisily torn in half my insides are bursting i can't decide what is most important to_me 040201 ... misstree oh my words, my children, seeing you creep out of the shadows in drink's haze breaks my heart, but the mundane calls in callous growls and snores, but poppa needs dinner, but the world and its calloused edges waits to call me back into the cradle. but just one night, just for a few moments, we danced, even as i question_everything 'd, even as i dove deep into murky warm saline, we danced the way we once did, and there was never a dance as pure as yours, as selfish and as sweet as yours, i'll never love someone like you and i swear that whatever blistering tides and searing floods come, i will always worship what you are to me. words, i love you as i love my soul. it wrecks me to say goodnight. goodnight. 041211 ... misstree and i wonder what i did to wound its heart so bad (operating_language) as i answer sleep, no Sleep 's call. forgive me, my love. 041211 ... Purgatorii Where am I to go from here? What am I to do? Caught in a battle between heart and mind, And time is running out.. 160603 what's it to you? who go blather from