sim Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease.

Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And, then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

Glibido: All talk and no action.
Dafremen Glumball Machine - A depressed nymphomaniac.

Lafugh - The half chuckle that slips out before you realize that the joke is on you.

Abored - Cancelling an activity that has become overly tedious.

Moxon - The act of applying mox as instructed to by a martial arts teacher. (See also moxoff)

Womain - A player's most frequently visited lady friend.

Booobs - A particularly oustanding set of hooters. (Also used in reference to any knockers seen after long periods of mammary deprivation)

Beeer - Similar to booobs, but in reference to liquid nirvana.
paste! fasteroids - really speedy rocks in outer space.

goldfather - the highest-ranking treasurer in a legitimate mafia.

carcinogent - an urbane, polite cancer-causing agent.

porchard - the section of fruit trees at the entrance to a house.

craption - a shitty, useless subtitle.
paste! copera - a musical drama strictly intended for police officers.

cannibalk - to almost eat somebody.
anyone hintergland - Area around the buttocks where "Old Faithful, the Whitehead" makes embarrassing appearances; esp. on obese slobs.

sublimpinal - When Bob Dole appears on anything besides Viagra commercials. (not to be confused with subliminable, as defined by Dubya, able to mispronounce certain words to draw attention away from the matter at hand.)

starcophagus - The Hollywood walk of fame.

hilaridous - so humorous as to parch one's throat. Alternatively, slang for a sarcastic term to define extremely dry humor from someone who believes they are the world's foremost comedian. As used in a sentence: "Wow, that joke from Carrot Top was hilaridous."

gesturde - Placing a dog's fecal matter on the lawn of your new Mormon neighbors as a formal greeting.

soleipsist - One who believes constantly being stepped on is the only knowable thing in life.

This is fun...should I continue, or stop now?
Dafremen I asked myself the same question and decided against continuing on the grounds that folx couldn't handle THAT much brilliance all at once. 010622
anyone Lafugh. 010622
paste! are those booobs or fasteroids?

just don't gesturde on my porchard, or i'll, i'll, i'll go and giraffiti your house! only after i finish this beeer though.
paste! verticali - to pull massive air off a wave, brah!

forechaster - a weatherman who has sworn celibacy.

dieseal - an internally-combusting, high-powered sea creature.
enriquecito heartbleak: that sinking feeling you get when you realize that, after so much disappointment and pain, that you may not ever be able to love again. especially disconcerting when there's someone, let's say with red hair and almost-pale skin, who deserves that more than anyone else you've ever met in your life. 010627
Dafremen oozel - If sentimental drivel were a painting, where certain love-struck sentimental drivellers might place it if they needed to slather some more emotional, romance-related rhetoric on it.

ghetton - The act of progressing in life after romantic setbacks rather than slumming around in the BARRIO of one's own disappointed ego.
kingsuperspecial Mextingusish – to cool one’s mouth when eating hot salsa by drinking a Negra Modello

Scoftware – when a company makes laughable computer programs.

Mananger – when you’re so mad you ask to see the manager

Fadmonish – to criticize someone for jumping on the bandwagon

Sintellectual – a person who knows a great deal about sinning.

Exhillaration – the excitement of being atop a really big hill.

Spontangeous - when you suddenly go off on a tangent
(not affiliated with any other antagonists) Dafiremen - those who must be called in when someone leaves a large volume of flaming bags at someone else's door. 010712
lothar of the hill people bluzzard: a verbal antagonist who scavenges the emotional scraps from others' blathers, becuase his or her own life has been unfortunately waylaid by a passing greyhound bus. there are a couple of these characters on every interactive Web site, I guess, who have given up on the world outside and instead cannabalize the life and love of others. we must pity them, brothers and sisters... 010713
Dafremen blothar - A bluzzard authored blather. Antonyms: see also Dafremen 010713
kingsuperspecial valaidate: a test that returns a value of true if you date puts out.

coupoon: remeemable for access to certain parts of the female anatomy.

bluffet: availble for free at many hotels if you lie about your room number.

examindation: requirse drill and small flashlight
kingsuperspecial Comfartable – when you’ve been with your girl long enough to float a biscuit without going into the other room.

Composser – the person who writes the theme music for a group of cowboys

FrAnkly - when some speaks in a forthright manner during an innerview.

Madnanimous – when someone does something nice even though they’re pissed off at you.
paste! pelicane - walking device made from the bones of a big dead bird.

Swheaties - an obsolete cereal; got crushed by Frosted Flakes in the early 80's.

hoarseradish - a spicy condiment that temporarily makes you lose your voice.

saxowphone - an ear-bleeding woodwind instrument.

manifeasto - a written declaration saying that you're going to eat a shitload of food.
phil hornyd (need)
chaird- burnt chair
retard)y- late again
breade- bread getting it on
dhope- idiot hoping
fugly- fuckin' ugly
goast- dead goat
parrows- two arrows -- --
naivel- virgin belly
lotusk- ivory carving of flower
penist or pienis
trumpest- annoying trumpet player
secrest- most secret
starel- clean stare
colora- sickly color
sapple- apple sap
scereal- wacked out cocoa puffs
homelesst (think molest)
juistice- juice law
ph(a)il- is getting good at this
kingsuperspecial showder - to bathe in clam chowder

sketchup - great bussiness ideas drawn up on a napkin using a french fry dipped in Heinz.

lickense - a permit to taste strangers without warning them first.

poretry - what kingsuperspecial writes
Persona Luftwaffle - A German eggo 020107
ClairE Goood. The extra "o" is for orgasm. 020107
paste! classifrieds - crispy, fat-saturated want ads.

legendairy - illustrious milk products.

Brushmore - enormous sculpture of 4 untangling devices located on the face of a mountain in South Dakota.
never dumbening cello phone: cumbersome wooden communication device, though beautiful if the connection is clear

dialdo: long rubber implement to assist in the selection of the correct numbers on your cello phone [warning: 976 is often the automatically chosen prefix]

conefucius: wise offspring of dan aykroyd and jane curtain

apeple: a most stimulating fruit

scat: poopie feline

skitty: feline with teflon paws [also, young scat]

pleather: duh

snugget: gold ingot stored in buttocks for secure keeping

xannex: additional room added to an existing building, used to store anxious people until they CALM THE FUCK DOWN
Persona erectify - To correct one's wrongdoings with a good stiffy 020108
Persona Misteake - A deep regret for ordering your t-bone extra rare due to a huge case of the power runs and spontaneous puking 020108
Teenage Jesus Cold WarD - Where old hawks are treated for their afflictions. 020108
paste! insignifichant - a meaningless repetitive droning.

phylegm - snot classification.

margabrine - heavily, and i mean heavily salted butter substitute.

stragedy - a tactical disaster.
paste! Mount Olympuss - magestic haven for feline gods. 020108
kingsuperspecial Fleelings - the trouble inside that makes you want to run away.

Refunged - when you get your money back for finding fung in your salad.

Stickets - what you bought from a scapler, and then realized the show was last night.

steoreo - when you put a popular nabisco cookie in each ear.

bananal - an unmentionalbe fruit based pastime.

automobyile - what moby drives

fibear - how bears stay regular
ever dumbening scroteum: repository for artistically rendered ball sacks

bourbone: a part of what once was your skeleton, now just a corroded, gelatinous mass due to over consumption of corn whiskeys.

masse: catholic billiards ritual
ever dumbening blather: that bitch in the pool that just won't shut the fuck up. 020927
ever dumbening add one letter addict sparking ticket: citation issue for stationary hotboxing
ever dumbening gapoplectic: vein-busting shock associated with seeing the price you paid for your sassy little pocket-T and easy fit stone wash button fly denim (don't forget socks and a belt), knowing full well the cost of manufacture in southeast asia. 021104
.. . 021104
kss conchoction - that weird lumpy stuff at the bottom of a glass of chocolate milk.

rantdom - a tirade on a subject not related to anything in the previous tirade

hangovert - a hangover that is obvious for anyone to see

relatted - having to do with a snooty coffee beverage

also addicted
kss pleadsure - what you feel after begging for some action.

cloneliness - when even your own genetic material is "in a weird place right now"

dumbilical - the cord the connects james to the rest of the world.

maglical - when you lick the beaters and get 3 wishes
kss zenthusiasm – when you get really excited and clap one hand.

sobjectify – when you cry over a woman’s breasts

affordlable – an agreeable price tag

dharmalade - essential nature of a thing that goes on your toast.
ever dumbening ah, and what a tenuous thread it is my friend. 021104
ever dumbening transom: fee paid in hopes of being freed from one of those windows above a door

Maceo: burning spray issued from police saxaphones, used to subdue teen pop fans

snail: substandard, slow, squishy fastening device for wood

shistory: a particulary good bit of the past, my nizzle

reeference: someone who can confirm that the herb you sell is good

farth: methane-burning stove
kss druink – that bender that finally does you in.

pearjury – lying about what you did under the fruit tree

tentuous – not sure you like to go camping

cleviathan – quick witted on a large scale

coptimist – someone that figures they can talk their way out of it.

evanglelist - will convert you to the church of geometry

cantildope - smokes up a nice, fruity buzz

playstic – synthetic material best used for toys
paste! chimichangar - a deep-fried airplane storage unit

horse d'ouevres - before the hay

eskimop - kinda like a squeegee; used for ice floors.

Kryloan - when you just can't afford spray paint...

cravity - i so want holes in my teeth.

Laundromoat - the first designated spot for mass washing of clothes; est. 1022, near a castle. no shit? yep.

herodin - opiate that makes you wanna sculpt. (oooh!)
ever dumbening scenter: the sweet-smelling middle

juniverse: the totality of all the stars, planets, and little hats
[i was forced at gunpoint to post this one]

grape: napa valley sexual assault

spasm: violent shaking caused by processed ham and pork shoulder product

violint: fuzz trapped in dryer during laundering of stringed instruments

foold: beautifully crafted, synthetic renderings of edibles, usually sushi

fyodor: foul scent often associated with russian novelists [add two letters, fuck you]

swine: poorly fermented and bovine-smelling, this could lead to date grape
paste! planktron - algae in the computer

monopolly - ok, but you can't have ALL the crackers...

discolaimer - what you might have been aware of in the late 70's in case you broke a leg while getting your smoove on

debutt - the first time you show off your ass

yartist - pirate portrait painter, else creative pirate
ever dumbening fucking stop, my stomach hurts 021104
ever dumbening lego: a building block of one's inner child

crampaign: the muscle tightening caused by excessively mudslinging politicians

slease: contract for a ghetto apartment

speakhers: cute little pink boxes used for reproducing sound, often poorly, but they match the upholstery

pupholster: cover furniture with dead baby seals

fhamily: a group of related pork products

heminem: o.g. tailor from da hood
"i'm hype wit da needle
hype wit da threads,
stichin up suits to look fly wit dreads"

scorruption: when you hit it big under the table

cattitude: fuckin pussies--who puts the goddamned food in your bowl?

cheavy: you're too fat for that vette

shockey: when your 1950's NHL tabletop game has loose wiring
kss mediocare – it’s big business at HMOs

helichopter – for aerial culinary work

smegaphone – for announcing your hygiene unpleasantries.

catcophony – throw a bag of cats into the orchestra .

tentomb – memorialize eternally with nylon

philanthropeist – someone who is generous with twine

misoggynist – wife beating in the rain

pornotgraphy – what you didn’t hide under you mattress

egg salaid – when bad breath gets her going

porchestra – for symphonic delite in your front yard
paste! penichillin - fight that shit yo, while a take a nizzap.

charmcoal - aww great just great barbecue.

shampoco - motel-sized hair products.

shit-ups - abdominal exercise/accidental laxative (c'mon now, that's stupid)

drividend - 18 wheeler overtime bonus

oclean - the freshly showered part of the sea

afreudian - fear of resolving unresolved infantile psychosexual conflicts

porchelain - a toilet, i do say, a toilet! pre-entry to thy house and shit?

vas defereins - the controlling ducts of horse semen

prepto bismol - what you take before taking pepto bismol
kss anteurysm – poor little guy must have been thinking too hard

chiminey – Cambodia surplus; for deterring satan for keeps.

groptesque – feeling up the chick you found with your beer goggles on

madternal – when dad come home, you’re going to get it.

interlaude – a respite from praise

plopulate – indigenous people rained from the sky

distorte – a confectioners delight from the cubist period

ghandis – snubbed by a pacifist
kss tofurist – someone that just visits the land of vegans

whaile – a rare and extremely violent meteorological condition

phunt – when the football gets lost WAY out of bounds

canknot – being bound to not do something

flmunky – an underling with a prehensile tail

dheadache – when your hangover is truly killing you.
paste! camelt - sometimes the sahara just gets TOO hot

politergeist - such a nice ghost

guitarp - when you can't afford a guitar case...

protassium - to be + K+
ever dumbening decembert: last month of the greek calendar [dig deep kids, it'll hit you eventually] 021105
paste! [nope, no it won't. you're on drugs.]

novembear - ever dumbening got attacked by one and so traumatized him that he lost his lid
p2 doctober - the person you call to cure someone who has been traumatized by a novembear 021106
werewolf midterminally ill - when midterms have reached a critical point and the taker can no longer be saved by studying or drugs and loved ones must sit quietly by and watch as the victim's body and mind are ravaged by the disease. 021106
werewolf oh only one letter eh?

boo to that.


blaste- an apathetic response towards the possibility of nuclear annihilation
ever dumbening [foolish mortals]

borgesh: brilliant south american writer who for some reason has a strong dislike for alex trebek

[dats for you splashy; just let 'em fly]
ever dumbening every seven seconds undebrestimate: false reading of what turn out to be serious bazooms, often due to loose fitting clothing 021106
kss fisherdmen – the harvesters of the goat_fish

Brititsh – found on women from England.

evapotrated – what happens to your weed when freeloading friends visit.

delicitous – an appealing flavor arrived at by logic

negotitate – you wanted to go all the way, but settled for a feel

dumbenking – when I hang out with e.d. too much

customber – you won’t be getting much repeat business
kss intearnet – collection of very sad websites.

moankey – small primate adept at sexual stimulation

sherbert – a sherbet enjoyed on Sesame Street

massticate – chewing the body of Christ

drawma – soap opera comic books

expjunge – analyze to the point of annihilation

cointaminate – I shudder to think where that penny has been.
kss dopera – it's like singing, and some fat chicks or something, uh, with lots of pretty colors, uh, and some other trippy shit.

vulava – baby, you're so hot!

crapyons – these only draw in brown, and your friends won’t want to play

someathing – not sure what it is, but if you put it between a bun, and try it, you might like it.

delierious – when the answer to “why did you come home at 4 am” is so implausible it makes your head spin.

copulater – not now, I have a heaache
ever dumbening reverentd: holy man for hire

froset: when it's so cold your gheri curl stiffens a bit

carrote: root vegetables you know by heart

button down shirat: well-dressed rodent

storque: that is one twisted bird (straight fucked up vector stylie--don't forget the right hand rule!)

plaint: boring vegetation

paradon: death-row inmates allowed to join the festivities in pasadena new year's day

shoeck: electronic footwear gone haywire

boatox: when your ship needs a little lift


sterious: quit joking around and concentrate on the road

pretire: fuck if i'm waiting until i'm 65

saturdate: so many women, so little time

borofice: so many holes, so little interest

[oh, and sherbert is often enjoyed in decembert, you fucks]
p2 septrember - the little shiver you get when eating your sherbert in decembert 021107
p2 (i'm not picking on anyone
just like going with a theme)
ever dumbening [why the hell not?]

aperil: primate pride month

mayt: getcho swerve on in month number 5
werewolf misolation: the feeling of lonliness one experiences when one lifts a bowl of hot japanese soup to their face and temporarily loses sight of their dining companion.

moreale: a general feeling of well being positively correlated with beer consumption.

starget: when you draw your bow on orion.

tearnish: when the silvery necklace you cry yourself loses its lustre and it's time to smile again.

skincere: a lover may use false words, but take solace in the truth of a touch.

spygmy: a secret agent from a tribe of diminutive people in Africa

sprousts: roughage you put on your sandwhich which when ingested invokes a remembrance of things past.

bonerd: what arises when you mention seven of nine to your star trek fanatic/ computer programmer friend.

copiate: donuts, the chosen drug of police officers

stalekers: what happens when you don't store the psycho hiding in your bushes in the proper tupperware container

cornvenient: those little thingys that allow you to hold hot corn.

hactor: a thesbian who couldn't even make a believable corpse

spreef: when coral just goes nuts

blust: a feeling of desire for the bust. often occurs after underbrestimation.

smuttered: to say something obscene under your breath. also often occurs after underbrestimation.

comaedian: carrotop

fartistic: bodily gas expulsion as a valid form of expression with its own aesthetic variations and norms.

bloode: a poetic tribute written non-metaphorically in the medium your heart pumps.

lieability: vulnerabilities and weaknesses inherant in being a good fibber.

adorkable: even dorks are cute as babies. also- any object which reminds one of a whale penis while also being particularly endearing.

pundermine: to deflate a person or idea's validity with a well timed pun.

eveer: to swerve suddenly into eternity

gopress: what the g.o.p will do to reason now that it's in power.

singelet: what a scorching guy like myself calls his wrestling uniform.

chinap: mao's answer to the siesta

cabort: drop me off here taxi driver!

sleuthanasia: after holme's condition worsened, watson had no other choice.

twashington: the name the mutants will give to post-apocalyptic washington.

shaggard: looking worn and run down due ot heavy duty swinger activities.

sinitial: the original sin

egoad: to push my buttons

sharm: the devestation in the wake of a fakery.

begoat: to give bring forth or accquire a goat. often the phrase ill begoaten is used to describe improper accquisition of said goat.

shalelow: as deep as this commonly found stone.

sorry i know it's a bit much. i was rather bored in class today. also...i used one dash and one instance of two words. but the benefit to humanity far outweighed the potential costs.
stork daddy shadism: enjoying inflicting cruel shadow puppets on another person. 021107
stork daddy blinguist: the term rapidly replacing the outdated term rapper. 021107
p2 aperil - also the most dangerous month 021108
p2 augbust - the best summer month to go to the beach to see all the lovely bikinis (at least in the northern hemisphere)
(hey s. diddy, blinguist is awesome.
if i ever become a rapper
i'm using that)
paste! waftermelon - downwind in the gheeto

Marlbjφro Man - notable Iceland cigarette icon

spearm - the product of ejaculating at a dangerous velocity

slurprise - i didn't expect you to call me THAT

pomegryanate - what Meg Ryan eats...over my naked body...drippily

diaperm - Huggies on the head, Huggies on the head

archerry - William Tell was accurate, but not this accurate

crampsite - it doesn't matter what kind of tent, terrain or sleeping bag you chose, something will be sore tomorrow.

centrifrugal - moving away from the center, inexpensively

spewing machine - oh, nice patchwork asshole.
birdmad digitall - clean optical reproduction aith added elevation 021108
grendel poptical - when the soda bubbles get in my eye

puncture - image captured through the proverbial rose-coloured lenses

fhorse - obligatory equestrian

sloda - when there's too much syrup and not enough water in the fountain

mountaint (1) - that funny little ridge between the caldera of the volcano and the steam vents

mountaint (2) - not really a mountain

grendell - computer for cave dwelling avatar of evil, and dude, you're gettin' one

potarto - for a little sour mash
grrendel hrm, second one should be "pincture" 021108
kss pickale – leafy and green, yet tangy.

haremony – a furry currency rated against the value of the carrot.

craniumy – a adjective describing food that is a zombie delicacy

mriscreant – an unruly child with a reduced instruction set.

gigabbyte – a large amount of idle talk.

lobottomy – rare procedure where sanity is restored by removing a part of the patient’s ass.

punkgent – that tasty aroma found around the crusty mohawk types.

sinterrogate – when the priest really goes after the dirt during confession.

proliftic – producing a large amount of work while riding the elevator.
stork daddy pimport: a pimp from a foreign country 021108
kss elephkant – a critic of pure pachyderm

bifogcal – special reading glasses for those living in the Sunset District of San Francisco

kintercourse – practiced mostly in the south

maleviolent – bad vibes taken to the logical step

vegestable – a broccoli you can rely on.
kss forkmidable – reigning terror with an eating utensil

fwishing – come on, fish! bite!

grantdma – when nana floats you a loan.

boredoom - I’d sell my soul for some stimulation
yenaldlosi blathroom - i felt the compulsion to rant and compose poetry aloud from off the top of my head while i was in the shower 021203
paste! hammertimer - U CAN'T TOUCH THIS STOPWATCH!

spausage - tea bags on the eyes, ground-up pork on the face

Moorphine - provides Andalusian delusions

Gatourade - for that deep down body thirst for high-energy sightseeing or checking out the facilities at 110%

Gloch Ness Monster - yo nizzle, i be mythical, slimy and packin' hizzle

ex-ray - what used to be a relatively high-energy proton

Loxford - Jesuit school in England

geriatrick - whoa, nice one gramps!
Calculus Luver #46 animalanche - when your stuffed animals fall off your bed when you're asleep 021203
ever dumbening pretarded: when you don't get it, well before everyone else 021203
Teenage Jesus calculust- math baby! Yeah! 021204
werewolf deepressed - when you're gonna need a real pickmeup just to make it back to sad. 021204
j teenage jesus gave me an idea

here is my new schedule:

scivics - palindrome class
menglish - write all day about boys
methics - the morals of drugs
calculust - see above
darnce - accident prone p.e.
stork daddy protocold: and the weather's not throwing us any surprises this day. it's another frosty one in anchorage.

emacifated: no one asks to be born in abject poverty. remember that when you're stuffing yourself with christmas goose.

prodcure: to obtain by insistent poking

loafern: all you do is sit there all day you stupid ugly plant
kss wishding - all that stands between me and recess is that bell

wainting - when desire is fading

phopeless - without John Paul, all is lost

brokzen - spare some change for enlightenment?

direary – when things become seriously bleak

memorey – expanded cranial storage

glamoronus – looking good, but not much going on upstairs
kss stayple - for really disobedient dogs

pfesto - a party of garlic and basil

interscourse - good clean fun

laspirin - better hope you don't get another headache

artwist - different, but creative
ever dumbening negligeence: i seem to have forgotten my silky underbreeches 030601
kss hjello - a colorful, jiggly wave
stampedeo - what european sun-bathers where to the bullfights.
bmarket - shopping center for dogs
lauwndry - good place to clean up after doing some yard work.
hjammer - a heavy tool used for smashing berries.
malfundction - a problem with your bank account
distplay - show off your goods from far away
negotigate - taking you way into the castle
nbegative - a grumpy homeless person
Dafremen blovine - A cow so light that it must be anchored down to keep it from being carried away by the wind. 030831
Doar . 040831
suicidalchinadoll instrant - the ability to launch into sporadic, and often idiotic misplaced dialogues.
freel - no charge to fish
enterstainment - a little too much fun
stwalker - a stalker with a walker
- or, a stalker on foot
forrum - a fan of booze
andru235 boaby - a decorative scarf made from infant children

bibile - a toxic substance spewn from the mouth of fundamentalists

korant - a toxic sentence spewn from the mouths of fundamentalists

monotheifsm - any of several "philo"-"sophies" bent on pilfering infinity from the societal mind and imprisoning said concept in a tomb called "god" or "physics"

nihilisum - the "philo"-"sophy" that everything adds up to zero, if less

philostophy - a set of tenets which contend that mankind is trapped in a maze of mirrors, built by the evil villains named "religion" and "science"

scantankerous - searching for a reason to reaffirm one's irritability

wonderfoul - it's amazingly malodorous

yoyou - a device which, when attached to your belt, allows you to be tracked wherever you go, and requires that you periodically talk to it. conversations become the property of the manufacturer. also known as a "mobile-cell".
superleni wangst – guilt over self love.

painskiller – nasty conditioning eventually leading learning & relief.

bierd – feather implants to the chin. the latest look.
epitome of incomprehensibility Loccult - supernatural shenanigans happening near you

Shurricane - a whirlwind of irritation only perceptible to people who insist on "sure" being pronounced "shoor" instead of "shur"

Trooth - a verifiable fact from the dentist's office
helpfull public_hair: every hair that's not down there hair 160426
what's it to you?
who go