maruku deaf and dumb and blind and born to follow 000627
half it's hard to follow with zero senses...Will you take my hand? 001002
half or pass me the pipe? 001002
Barrett "Choices always were a problem for you.
What you need is someone strong to guide you.
Deaf and blind and dumb and born to follow.
What you need is someone strong to guide you.
Like me."

birdmad The Caterpillar's favourite vice.

The anesthetic cloud.

crazychick stop drop and roll what? 001123
Mushroomman ....If you want to get your soul to heaven, trust in me, now don't you judge or question...... 010707
mushroomman You are broken, now, but faith can heal you, Just do everything I tell you to do... 010707
Devilsquishy "I know you well, you are a part of me..
I know youbetter than I know myself..."
mushroomman Better than one might think...






monde god's own medicine:
opiates are the mass
of my religion

or were
methadone satiates
not the same as satisfaction
but close enough

i hear the war is causing heroin shortage
not because america's junkies buy afghanistan heroin
but because the borders have tightened up all over, and the mexicans are having trouble getting their balloon mules through.
unhinged your smell lingered on me
close you were
to make me smile later
i kept touching you in hopes
you could find your way back
to that place
but i have your secrets
and you have my heart
and while we live apart
engendered in our own
drugs of choice
that lingering smell can still
make me smile
the wonderingly small few
molecules of you
left behind
birdmad the morphine that numbed my father through his last days as the cancer ravaged him

the little vials of a potent dose meant to be fed through the stent in his chest

when he was gone, i took a few, i kept them cold and there my habit began, before i graduated to the less conspicuous cigarettes which a knowledgeable friend doctored with heroin

nearly a year lost among the poppies
paranoid martyr singing "Opiate", from Opiate [EP], Tool.

Choices always were a problem for you.
What you need is someone strong to guide you.
Deaf and blind and dumb and born to follow,
what you need is someone strong to use you...
like me,
like me.

If you want to get your soul to heaven, trust in me.
Don't judge or question.
You are broken now, but faith can heal you.
Just do everything I tell you to do.
Deaf and blind and dumb and born to follow.
Let me lay my holy hand upon you.

My God's will becomes me.
When he speaks out, he speaks through me.
He has needs like I do.
We both want to rape you.

Jesus Christ, why don't you come save my life.
Open my eyes and blind me with your light and your lies.
unhinged i have managed to control my descent but i think it will soon be tumbling out of control. all in all, it's only four more months. i could make it out alive in only four more months. i can make it out alive can't i?

i want to do maynard.
paranoid martyr i go first, unhinged. pleeeease? 030109
no reason i'm marrying him. 030110
unhinged sure. go ahead. i've never been the first to do anything. 030110
.... My one true love...
I live and I will die for you.
ergo television 090927
Ouroboros I get cravings, deep cravings, for the cotton/numb/floating/emptiness that vicodin gives. I'm glad I don't have access to any/can't be tempted. Sense memory cravings fade. 090928
In_Bloom I traded them for the bliss of skin on skin
It's rarer, more expensive and a true challenge to maintain but it's my drug of choice, my indulgence
My treasure
Risen Opiate withdrawal is horrible. It hurts. You run hot and cold and you sweat. Tiredness comes in waves, joining with the return of the bone and flesh fatigue of my condition which I had almost forgotten.

It gives you cravings, where your hands shake and your muscles twitch, and you can barely focus enough to tie a shoelace. They gave me a list of things which might help. All would have dulled my mind, except nicotine.

I bowed my head and went back to smoking.
Risen Annnd again 150215
what's it to you?
who go