descent Tess I apologize for breaking the law The Descent of Inanna by that crazy lady Starhawk The Storehouse You are trying to remember something It teases your nostrils like desert dust Take a breath Smell the dry air and the mud by the irrigation canals and the moist earth under the date palms Hear the play of water in the fountain in the courtyard where you walk Remember your name Inanna Lady of the Date Palm Lady of the Storehouse Its gate stands before you From the doorposts streamers fly It is your temple your body This place All comes here to be gathered, counted to be given out again What is it you gather? What do you hoard? What do you give? This is a big place You could get lost here Searching through dusty corridors where everything that ever was still is Whatever you have lost you can find here if you don't lose yourself Take care Call someone to watch for you Who would come after you if you walked into danger? Who helps you? Who cares? Call See that person sit beside the gate to wait And if you know no one you can call Ask the Mother herself to guard you to remember you and bring you back Feel her hand touch your hand Smell the breath of earth as you push the gate aside and enter 991231 ... tess The Storehouse, cont Inside, it is cool You reach out your hand touch the stone smell the damp feel the air on your skin as you walk through dim corridors Lined with oil jars, grain jars baskets of dates, figs pistachios, jars of honey all the land's produce You are the storehouse You walk through your own bowels room after room Here are treasures carved and molded images precious stones, gold Here is a loom and a tapestry and the tattered shreds of history to unravel and roll into yarn What will you weave? Feel the texture See the colors Here is the gathered up knowledge of the ancestors secrets piled like old bones Search through them among them is the thing you need to know... And here is a chamber that is yours alone What do you find there? There is still somewhere you are trying to go You hear a rustle A snake uncoils from a basket glides along the floor You follow Deep in the storehouse a chasm opens up A crack leads down below Listen Put your ear to the crack Do you hear a call? 991231 ... Tess The First Gate When you hear the call from the Land Below it sounds both strange and familiar Like the chorus of a song whose words you can't remember Like the promise of a lover you don't completely trust Like a dare It frightens you Entices you All the treasures of the Upper World sunwashed groves sky-mirroring fountains hillock land, well-watered furrow and the moon's narrow boat All of that seems so shallow You have heard the call from the deep You follow Take a deep breath and go down feeling the weight of your body shift as you descend and the cool stone closes around you Feel the heaviness of earth above you And the snake guides you Down Down and down following the path that leads to the Land Below And at last you come to the first gate Look at it see what it is for you that walls off the depths and blocks your way What does it look like? Feel like? What's there for you? In front of the gate stands the Guardian and you breathe deep and walk forward... And the figure of the Guardian becomes slowly clear You see what it is for you... human, animal, or some other creature? You begin to see its body and its limbs, how it is clothed, its color You begin o sense its size smell its odor on the air You walk closer Now you see its head, its face, its features You can hear its voice, you look into its eyes The Guardian speaks to you... Breathe deep, and hear what it says The Guardian says Who comes to the gate? You answer It is I, Inanna I want to go to the Land Below The Guardian shrugs Impossible You're not worthy You're not qualified You don't have the right credentials Who do you think you are? You say I am the Queen of Heaven The Guardian replies You're in the wrong place, then So you set out to convince the Guardian that you are worthy of this journey You list your achievemnets Your skills what you have produced, what you have accomplished what you have stored in the treasure house what's owed to you The Guardian looks bored The gate stays shut And everything you name seems hollow Behind you the way back has disappeared At your feet even the snake looks dead, torpid her eyes glazed You were stupid to come down here arrogant foolish Now you're stuck Your great achievements all the things you do to prove your value the emblems of your position mean nothing down here They all drop away clatter to the ground The snake rubs her belly on them Her skin splits She sloughs it sliding free It lies in a heap like an old rag She has shed as you have shed The gate opens... Beyond the first gate you wander light, unburdened with the simple confidence of a cat, or a child That your life is worth something Everything you pass, touch, see is outlined in the clear light of wonder that it should be what it is You need only be what you are All that is, has its being in you Go down Continue Down and down 991231 ... Tess The Second Gate The Second Gate is fear When you go down far enough it arises wearing a helmet, armor wearing an enemy face carrying weapons it blocks the gate Fear says Go back And you hear what it threatens you with if you go on Fear says turn around And you hear what it offers you if you obey Fear says something you alone can hear and you know what it is Choose To go on you must take off your clothes Lay down the cloak that keeps out the cold and the shield that turns the spear and the armor that turns the arrow's point Take off your breastplate and helmet Fear doesn't go away but you walk toward fear naked And the gate opens Past the Second Gate you dance fearless in the open your skin one living organ that embraces air 991231 ... Tess The Third Gate The Third Gate is silence Earth eats sound The Dead have no voices And somewhere you have lost yours Words arise in you songs, chants, poetry pushed upward like fountains by the shifting weight of continents but find no outlet Springs dry up What keeps you silent is a voice that has stolen your voice and sings continuously in a low drone that you are, indeed, alone Even the snake has disappeared anyway the damn thing only hisses sssssssssssssss To pass this gate you must sing Emptiness echoes around you No one will hear you But you breath deep and call Your breath becomes a sound that tries to fill the echoing caverns and fails and tries again Sing your own name Sing the names of helpers, lovers, ancestors, children names of power Keep on singing, keep on making noise even as your sound dies away in the dark and your throat hurts from the stranglehold of silence Keep calling Until at last your call is echoed from Below And somehting comes through you that blasts silence into pieces they lie on the ground like discarded jewels The gate opens You pass through singing You have found your voice and all that lives sing through you Beyond the Third Gate Music weaves the fabric of the world 991231 ... Tess The Fourth Gate All that singing has made you thirsty All the shedding has left you hungry Down here You find no food, no water The Fourth Gate is need You are ravenous inside you is a cavern that cannot be filled bottomless immeasurably empty This is the Gate of the Give-away Pass through here to be recycled To make way for something new When you are empty you have nothing to give but yourself Give yourself away Say good-bye to the body soft touch of skin on skin smell of wet earth birdsong, drumbeat sunlight, color Good-bye, good-bye You can bring nothing through here Rip open your skin Throw it over your shoulder Carry it through the open gate Past the Fourth Gate You follow a river that flows backward and forward at once 991231 ... Tess to be continued tomorrow, with the Last Gate and the Return. 991231 ... Q For your breaking the law, I weep, smile and offer head and hand and everything to defend you from all slings and arrows with all the might I have to bare for you. 000101 ... Tess The Last Gate You come to the Last Gate You have no senses left to see it, feel it But you know it's there You know what it is And who sits before it The Guardian says Who passes this gate Does not return But how could you go back now anyway? Nothing but bones and a rag of skin What more could you possibly lose? Your memories Says the Guardian Give them up Let them go They fall out of you like ripe fruit old rotting meat grain and seed lie in the dust before the gate Nameless, memoryless You pass through The old rag of skin they hang it on a meathook by the gate The bones they are scattered, lost This is the end of it all All comes down to a dead meat hanging on a wall And below you march the Dead They come in an endless procession And some come old, eager for rest And some come young, raging And some come sick, and weary And some come riding in battle formation And some come screaming from wounds of torture And some come empty-bellied and stick-legged And some come burned And some come in the great glut of wat The procession winds like a snake They pass by you, every one And there's not one damn thing you can do about it You are the corpse on the gate Your sister is Queen of the Dead She is more powerful than you You know that, now She swallows them all the starved, the poisoned the bombed in their crowded hordes They make her stomach hurt She moans Oh, my belly, my heart They are her children She cries for them Look into her eyes They are your mirror They are your own eyes Feel your belly swell gorge unwilling until you think you'll burst And still the killing goes on and they come the Dead in their endless lines You have lost yourself but you are not lost You have forgotten yourself but you are not forgotten Somebody waits for you Remember? If you have ever known help remember it now help is coming If there is anyone who would follow you down to danger bless them now for here come two strange creatures They have no sex, they have no gender They approach the Queen of the Dead where she moans Oh my belly! Oh my heart! Oh your belly! Oh your heart! They cry She looks up, surprised She does not expect sympathy She is moved, she weeps Her tears join the river that flows both ways at once The Dead are flooded out Who are you? What do you want? Sweet creatures, I will give you anything! Says the Queen of the Dead We want nothing They say But the corpse on your gate Take that old rag, and welcome to it You are lifted You taste honey on your tongue, the Food of Life between your lips, the Water of Life The Queen of the Dead gives a great cry Her belly ripples like wheat in the wind You are blown away Swirling, spiraling around and around You are eaten, swallowed In her belly all souls dance You dance too in rhythm with the round of the stars and the atom's frenetic beat the swirling clouds, the rain they running flying creeping crawling things the swimmers and stalkers and shapers all dance back and forth, in and out death and rebirth You hear voices far away They sound strangely familiar Bear Down! Push! Breathe! The world contracts. You are shaken, Squeezed. She's crowning! Look! Here it comes! You slide free Beyond the Last Gate you are reborn This is the mystery of the Round Dance Birth. Death. Rebirth. What you have learned is that no one escapes What you have learned is that everyone returns and renewal comes as the Vulture taking all that has been wasted to feed what circles and soars 000102 ... Tess The Return You slide free and float down the river that flows both ways at once Your newness almost unbearable the colors of everything so bright each sound so clear each smell so sharp The river carries you What has been born in you? What new thing do you bring back from Below? The current washes you up on shore On the bank you find baskets of old fruit, grain, seed, memory Sort through them Which do you take back? Which do you need? Which do you transform or discard in the river, food for the trout and the water strider? Dive into the river, let it carry you again Let the swirling water knead you into form What form do you take? How will you satisfy your hunger now that you have tasted the Food and Water of Life? Swim to the banks. Raise your voice. Hear its power. What songs will you sing of your journey? What words do you bring back from Below? Look down On the grass is a pile of armor, weapons, clothing They were yours once Do you need them now? Which will you take back with you? How will you protect yourself? How will you clothe yourself when you return? And your skills, your knowledge, your achievements They line the banks like a litter of coins How will you carry them now? What will they mean to you? What new understanding do you bring to them? The river twists like a serpent Blink your eyes They river is the snake She has shed She is new, iridescent She emerges through the crack You follow her leaving the passages Below coming up into the storehouse Examine its treasures with new eyes Is there a gift for you? Something to bring to the people? Walk past the corridors, the oil jars, the grain jars the baskets of dates, figs, seed Place your hand on the door that opens out Say goodbye and emerge into the sunlit courtyard Someone is there to greet you Thank your helper Tell your story Look at the courtyard with new eyes The fountain in the center is the holy well of water from the river that flows both ways at once The flame on the altar is the earthfire, hearthfire They story woman winks at you and you remember that you are not alone Stretch out your hand Touch Feel the living edge Of another being We have all descended We have all emerged The bigges things In the universe Are circles of light Anarchist circles They refuse to obey the laws of gravity By those laws they should fly apart but they hold together So can we Touch Link Circle Hold on Holding together we can hold on to the memory of who we really are and no barrier can contain us Holding together in the circle We can bring the dead lands Water of Life We become healers The flame burns to warm us, feed us in the center of where we are Where we are is the center All our paths are spokes of the wheel 000102 what's it to you? who go blather from