variations_on_a_theme_by_someone klairchen I just felt like writing this. No reason, just boredom. 000922 ... Barrett and for lack of anything better, I will now tell you about a cute fuzzy little bunny who had an ice cream cone. It was chocolate ice cream. He liked chocolate ice cream. Then a big mean wolf came by. He liked chocolate ice cream too. He also liked cute fuzzy little bunnies. So he ate both of them. Then he took a nap. 000923 ... silentbob *applause* 000923 ... splinken as we grow, we take everything we see from people around us, television, movies, music, books, magazines, etc., and we fashion a personality. likes and dislikes, memberships in fan clubs, favored sexual positions, blah, blah, blah. we arrange the pieces in the jigsaw puzzle to make a picture we like (or dislike--for you people in the self_loathing camp). you aren't born special, you know. you have to sweat and kick and scratch and knock a lot of things over before you can even begin to be special. 000923 ... Q There is best often variation on the theme of sexual position. I just felt like writing this. No reason, just boredom. 000923 ... klairchen I just felt like writing this. No reason, just boredom. Again. 000923 ... Barrett Coming soon ... "THE CONTINUING ADVENTURES OF THE CUTE FUZZY LITTLE BUNNY" 000923 ... klairchen I saw two bunnies the other day, one was all white and had black elegantly surrounding both eyes. It looked like the bunny had gotten into the liquid eyeliner. Nethertheless, I'm pretty sure that he/she was trying to seduce the other bunny with his/her made up eyes. 000926 ... j_blue wow 000927 ... Barrett Once there was a little boy. He had two cute fuzzy little bunnies. He loved the cute fuzzy little bunnies. And the cute fuzzy little bunnies loved him. One day the cute fuzzy little bunnies chewed up his favorite blanket. They also pooped under his bed. The next day the little boy loved his new cute little bunny slippers. 000927 ... klairchen And after I saw the bunny with the liberally applied liquid eyeliner, that guy appeared again, wearing his bunnyhug. But I wasn't wearing any eyeliner, so all attempts at seducing him failed. 000927 ... Barrett Once there was a cute fuzzy little bunny. The cute fuzzy little bunny had a problem. Because the cute fuzzy little bunny was always looking up at the clouds, he was constantly trippng over things. One day Mr. Owl noticed the cute fuzzy little bunny's problem. "Excuse me, cute fuzzy little bunny," he said. "But if you were to look at the ground ahead of you, instead of the sky, you could see the rocks on the trail. Then you wouldn't trip." "Thank you Mr. Owl, I will try that." said the cute fuzzy little bunny. The next day the happy cute fuzzy little bunny walked down the trail. He did not trip once. Instead of seeing clouds and butterflys, he saw flowers and tasty treats for him to eat. The cute fuzzy little bunny did not, however, see Mr. Owl's talons before they pierced into his back. Mr. Owl had a good lunch. 001019 ... Return of the Eruth Be 20 OCT 2000 001019 ... not god the fuzzy bunny approached the open door of the massive c-130 cargo plane. he peered through the mist, then jumped. he felt the familiar rush of wind over his fur. his ears whipped franticly like a pair of snapping locker room towels. after a quick minute, he spied the target through his WWI flying ace goggles. he pulled the ripcord, and... nothing. 001103 ... god bunny patted his chest desperately hoping to locate the ripcord for his spare chute. he was gathering speed at a fantastic rate. his thick haunches pumped vainly and involuntarily. 001211 ... maybe satan The cute fuzzy bunny hoped against hope, his legs and haunches still flailing, that the emergency chute powered by the CO2 cartridge would deploy before he crossed terminal altitude. As he saw the other chutes some distance above him, he had a moment of zen and was at least grateful that this was not a live fire excercise. 001212 ... grendel with a gasp and a jerk as the breath was yanked out of him, the cute fuzzy bunny felt the small emergency chute deploy. Hard. A moment of panic ensued as he fought to regain his breath. He was far from the target now and descending toward a clearing in the forest several miles from the nearest highway. The sound of hounds and banjos in the distance as he drifted down could not be a good sign. 001228 ... god he scanned the ground for a place to land so he could enjoy his great relief. out of the corner of his eye, he noticed an early 70's dodge charger, painted bright orange, and with a rebel flag painted on top. 001229 ... Thyartshallshant Its funny, anyone that just "stumbles" across this blather page is gonna really wonder why its compleatly about bunnies. But i know! Yes, I, Thy, knows why this is, will i tell you? No, i can give you a hint though. Bunny. Ok, ive had my fun. 001231 ... god daisy's jeans rode up the crack of her ass as she reached for the oil filter deep within the engine department of her beloved jeep, "dixie". 001231 ... Presydent Barrett The Presydent pulls up in his Presydential limo, and cracks the window. "Do you need some help, little girl?" heh heh heh 001231 ... daisy sajak uh, hello there sir. i cain't seem to reach this here lil' ol' aahhwwl filtah. wait! what's that! up in the sky!!! 001231 ... The emperor wears a %#$&ring Cook! Where's my lunch?! Cook! Where's my dinner?! Cook! Where's my Hasenpfeffer?! 001231 ... syd barrett uhhhhhh.... anyone here order a pizza?? 001231 ... ass facely sausage sajak jr thoughts of rabbit pizza immediately filled daisy's inbred little mind. she must capture this rabbit and go to the boar's nest, where she can cook up this critter in the fancy 'lectric stove they got. 001231 ... the spork utilising the contortion techniques he learned while in the captivity of mongolian circus acrobats, the cute fuzzy bunny flopped about, feigning a seizure, upending the cage and squeezing out through the small opening. Before the inbreed and the man in the limo could catch him, the bunny unkinked his small frame and fled into the woods, trying to orient himself with the aid of the afternoon sun and find his way back to the LZ to rejoin the team But first to find the flares that had been in his pack... 001231 ... Si-Rhin "Mr. Presydent?" *The V.P. shakes her head, walks out of the room, and goes to tidy up the doghouse, for him* 001231 ... Presydent still drunk for last night "I ain't drinkin' ma..." 010101 ... ass facely bunny scurries off to hide behind uncle jessie's still. he thanks his lucky human's foot for the safe landing and narrow escape. he then throws it down, cause it was very heavy and foul-smelling. he watches the man in the limo and the mysterious dark haired beauty talking to him. they provided much-needed distraction. 010101 ... god bunny surreptitiously unzips his fly and takes a long, slow, steady leak. the entire time he fondles his rabbithood whilst eyeing the crack of daisy's ass, barely covering her womanly nether-regions. he felt a burning in his loins. with a little help from the potent fumes from the still, his mind begins to drift... 010102 ... Rhin Daisy decides to stretch her gams out, upon the lush upholstery, inside the Presydent's limo. She absentmindedly plays with a perky nipple, and tries to ignore that ache between her thighs. She then looks down to the floor, and notices a small, lone book - pages doggeared, and a little smudgy. Regardless, she begins to read...(and yes, she can read!!!) 'Puff, the Masochistic Drag Queen' (a warped variation (by Rhin) of a classic childrens tale: 'Puff, the Magic Dragon') Puff, the Maso. Drag Queen lived by the sea. He frolicked in the ocean mist, in a land called Mi-am-i. Tiny Ruby Paula loved that raunchy Puff. He bought him beads, and candle wax, and lots of bondage stuff. Together, they would cruise the strip, in a hot pink covert. caddy. Ruby kept a lookout perched on Puff (cause he was short), can't you see. Naughty kinks and perverts would bow whene'er they came. Pretty men would lower their pants, when Puff roared out their name. A drag queen lives forever, but not so pretty boys. Painted faces, and nipple rings, make way for other toys. One blue night it happened, Ruby Paula came no more, and Puff that Maso. Drag Queen, he ceased his feminine roar. His head was bent in sorrow, red sequins fell like rain. Puff no longer went to play, in the drag bars down the lane. Without his life-long lover, Puff could not make a wage. So, Puff that Maso. Drag Queen, sadly slipped behind the stage. 010103 ... Rhin ...Once upon a time, there was a lonely kind of a guy, who resigned himself to the fact, that love was blind. Now, if love is blind, he thought to himself, how will it find me? It honestly seemed such a crime. Well, how many times has love knocked on the door, when it should have been knocking on mine? And so one day, he went off in search of the aloof creature. He soon happened upon the cute & fuzzy bunny gang. Perhaps they could help him? "uhhhhhh....pardon me, cut & fuzzy bunnies," he said. "I wonder if you could help me find love?" "Ahahaha....love would have nothing to do with such a stupid looking creature," said the first cute & fuzzy bunny. "Ahahaha....with that nose, and those shoes, and that stomach, and those eyes, and those ears!....Roses are red, violets are blue, but love would have nothing, to do with youuuu!!!", they chanted and danced around him. Naturally our hero was very saddened by this, so......ummmmm, he......actually he uhhhhh...heeee...he reached into his suitcase, and pulled out an Israely sub-machine gun, and he started splattering the cute & fuzzy bunnies - alllll over the place! "Grrrrrrrrrr!!!" (excerpt - One Crazy Summer) 010104 ... WingedSerpent Bunny, realizing that Daisy (although likely a great deal of fun) would only be a distraction from his plan and purpose, scurried back to the place where he had cut himself free from his pack and gear. He did not find the flares he was hoping for but did find the small GPS locator that he had requisitioned from supply a few days before and had only barely remembered to pack in with his gear. He sighed with releief to realize that he was only a few kilometers away from the target Landing Zone. But he was not looking forward to facing an angry platoon commander when he made it back in and the incessant kvetching from the man about how there was "no place in this man's army for lop-eared varmints" Who in the hell did he think he was anyway, Yosemite Sam? 010104 ... Rhin see: love_you 010105 ... god rabbit woke with a start in a strange bed. he heard the bleep and whir of medical machinery. was it a dream? his mind felt like a shredded sock on an abandoned clothesline. his eyelids grew heavy. his head spun madly. 010115 ... grendel The man in the white lab coat stood over the cute fuzzy bunny and flipped him on his back, gently scratching his belly. Even through the drugged stupor, bunny recognized and act of kindness and let one of his hind legs kick weakly with pleasure in a manner similar to that of a lazy lapdog The strange visions began again when the gentle hands scratching his belly righted him again and he heard the click of buttons as the man in the white coat began pressing buttons on a console and the odd, exhilarating rush of the machinery wired to his head pulsed to life again 010117 ... birdmad he did not know how he found himself driving the motorcycle, only that he was driving it... ...fast. The highway rushed beneath and around him in a grey-black blur. the cold desert morning air whipped his eartips wildy about and the sound of the sirens, however unfamiliar to his small rodent brain, seemed to increase his desire to run. he could fel the gun in the pocket of his coat and figured he wouldn't go down without a fight meanwhile, in the real world, the machinery next to him whirred and hummed and the man with the gentle hands and white lab coat scribbled frantically on a notepad 010123 ... crappon for the ultimate scary/fuckedup bunny story read the maxx 010123 ... god bunny woke suddenly. his eyes focused on the doctor's name badge. "crappon", it read. he reached for his gun, but felt only matted damp fur. he wretched violently, spewing forth an orange, acidic carrot-laden stream. 010124 ... frankenfistkitten Alarmed by the vomiting bunny, Dr. Crappon began the program shutdown sequence to ease the bunny's transition to reality, if he disconnected bunny too suddenly, his fragile, furry little mind might not recover and in spite of his professional obligations, the good doctor had gotten quite attached to the little harirball why else would he have gone through the trouble to make the neural receiver a non invasive device (that and the fact that all the test subjects that had been hardwired to the machinery had the habit of spontaneously combusting under extreme stress situations...made him glad that they had tested those crude versions on sociopaths and war criminals, people who ordinarily would have functioned best in violent and chaotic situations.) he cleaned away the bunny vomit, laid down fresh bedding and put him back in his cage, still frozen with the strange mix of his own tiny brain and the sudden, and increasing suffusion of human consciousness snapping back to his more base level, he realized that he was terribly thirsty and crawled lethargically to the dripper bottle. 010131 ... birdmad as mundane as the sensations were, the water filling his small dehydrating body as he drank from the dripper bottle was the sweetest feeling he had ever known he could feel the other consciousness seething below the surface and felt the strange dual feeling of appreciation for what the doctor was giving him this way and a gnawing hatred for the way these experiences ravaged body somewhat invigorated, he moved over to the food dish and ate slowly from the blend of roots and greens and sprouts in his dish The doctor turned off the main overhead lights in the laboratory and the bunny slept fitfully, enjoying the respite, but knowing that the experience would resume tomorrow. that night, he managed to avoid dreaming. 010208 ... god he woke suddenly yet peacefully. "is it the tenth?" 010218 ... johnny west "No," answered his mother. "Your breasts are showing." He quickly covered them with fur, and went back to sleep. His mind told him that love was an angel, but it was also impure. He smiled. Impure love was the best kind. 010304 ... god then hot spikes of steel rained down upon his head like the teeth of satan. "ouch", he cried. 010430 ... god rabbit woke with a start in a strange bed. he heard the bleep and whir of medical machinery. was it a dream? his mind felt like a shredded sock on an abandoned clothesline. his eyelids grew heavy. his head spun madly. 010430 ... god he lept spryly off the bed, then turned to face himself in the mirror. the very next instant, he was buried alive in a shoebox sized casket. he gasped for air that had gone stale minutes ago. the hot muffled mad clawing ceased. rabbit's mind went out like a sheet of black nothingness over the sun. 010518 ... the brother of that guy over there "I am not a number! I am a free man!" read the back of the bunny's T-shirt. 010606 ... grendel As the doctor toyed with more switches and buttons on the console, the rabbit could feel the returning of his consciousness, but was now keenly aware that the simple impulses were gone. somehow, in the primal recesses and curvature of his brain, he could think, he could feel, he could KNOW. he sucked the stale carbonated air once again, drawing deeply like the gasp of a rat in a pythhon's coils, trying to get to the last remanants of the oxygen he could he was not far below the surface he was not below the surface at all he kicked, and though sedated and restrained, his panic-stricken flailings knocked the cover off his holding pen, much the same way as it had in the simulated capture scenario he had endured earlier. "yes" the doctor thought, "it works" ...in a small room isolated in the back of the laboratory, the figure lying in the bed breathed another slow and raspy breath as the monitors beeped to indicate that all was as it had been for some time now 010607 ... god rabbit was now fingering the frayed tassels at the end of his rope. how much more could a mind designed to focus on carrots take? he didn't want to find out. still, the apparitions came. nameless ghosts from a time before the sun. they wheeled and spun towards and away from him at light speed, caressing the dark recesses of his mind with feathery wisps of unknown emotions and overwhelming information. 010618 ... grendel in the little room the doctor pondered the withered frame and began to rig the machinery to its head the raspy breathing continued, the respirator hummed. in the main lab, awake, aware and increasingly perplexed at his new level of awareness, the rabbit pondered the latch mechanism on his cage apparently the doctor in the white coat had thought of this eventuality and the rabbit noticed that although the scent of the bedding was still his own, the cage was not he drank from the dripper bottle and looked arounf the room 010619 ... Sol concerned by the detrimental effects that the 'experiments' were having on the poor rodential frame of the increasingly self aware Rabbit, the man in th ewhite coat began to, in a misguided act of what he took to be kindness, add steriods and protein suppliments to teh rabbits feed, "never enough to cause an unprecidented change" he thought. The Rabbit woke once more form the enforced otherness it experienced via the captured memories of the past subjects of the machine, their memories, experiances and beliefs turning form a trickling brook at the back of his consciousness to a steadily increasing torrent. he could feel the cold steel bench through his fur, depleted by the effects of the machine. the probes making the skin itch around his eyes and ears. the light had a new quality, he now knew of its artificiality, the scent of disinfectant brought memories from the past of a previous experimentee to the forefront of his mind. frantically he whipped his body round, thrashing within the tiny bonds holding him down. his buck toothed mouth fighting to scream words he knew he could say, he knew the meaning of. The doctor looked on with concern. This was unexpected, at least so soon, before the moral blocks had been put in place. his small charge ceased its struggle, already its frame increasing due to the hormones that the doctor had administered, human testostorone, rather than that of a rabbit, due to the fear of hampering the proccess underway. absentmindedly the doctor returned him to a new cage, not noticing the change in alertness and apparent interaction the rabbit was attempting. The Rabbit would wait, It was begginging to get a thirst for this, the new experience forcing open his mind. He considered the lock, but having determined its functionality, he decided to wait. Before long he coudl try if he wanted, first more knowledge must be gained 010619 ... grendel he fell back into a fitful sleep and if the man in the white coat had been close enough, he would have heard a whisper, weak and broken from the general vicinity of the cage. a sound made from a throat that nature had never intended to produce human speech as the rabit fell into sleep he whispered "let me out" 010619 ... Ziggy okkay, so I'm just about to ruin your lovely story but hay it were quite short any how. 010624 ... birdmad "Just a brief cycle of the steroid suplements" the man in the lab coat said as he began making instructions to the food handler to doctor the rabbits feed supply. He studied the charts and looked at the library of recordings. If these few samples had that level of effectiveness on a rabbit, he thought to himself, regardless of the short term physiological trauma, imagine the effect it would have on a more capable brain. the sheeted figure sleeping in the adjustable bed in the small observation room in the back rasped another slow breath 010705 ... velvet spasm rabbit burst out of bed like a shot from a cannon. with one mighty leap he flew across the room and up to the air-conditioning vent near the ceiling. one ear grabbed the grate and slung it to the floor, while the other propelled him down the ductwork and out into the light. his eyes were momentarily stunned. after a short second, they focused on an orange dodge charger, with a rebel flag painted on the roof. 010711 ... rabbit of the morning christ!, i'll never be able to reach the clutch and shift at the same time. he searched the lot for an automatic. 010711 ... velvet spasm his eyes landed on an '80 amc spirit with cracked glass and two broken leaf spings. "jesus", he thought. he lept into the drab cockpit and deftly crossed the wires and drove south as fast as he could. 010712 ... god after an eighteen hour drive, he pulled wearily into panama city, florida. it was spring-break! all the beautiful youg people were disco-dancing! he spied a girl with eerily familar features. he stuck his head out the window and yelled. "wassup baby girl?" 011114 ... the spork the girl and her other companions did a double take at the sight of the rabbit behind the wheel. but then resumed their conversation assuming it was just an ecstasy fueled hallucination brought on by the dose they had ingested at the foam party going on in the club rabbit called out again "Damn, baby, what, you can't even say hello?" 011115 ... god the girl apprehensively approached the car. rabbit's eyes narrowed. she cautiously peeked inside as rabbit fell into stunned silence. a flood of memories came rushing back in an overwhelming tidal wave of realization. 011120 ... not god he felt something warm on his upper lip 011216 ... birdmad the sleeping boy woke up in the fuzzy blue light of pre_dawn and could see the dark stain of blood on the pillowcase. he looked at himself, unsure his vision shifted violently, almost enough so as to knock him off balance he felt the notch on his head where the IV had been fitted and shuffled to the small bathroom, turning on the light and wiping the slowly flowing blood from his face. he still felt realtively strong, but feverish and a little sore, his boots lay by the bathroom door and his uniform was neatly folded and draped over a chair by the door he took a wad of the folded paper towels from the dispenser byu the mirror and ran them under cold water, packing them tightly and putting them on the back of his head and near the stent, tilting his head forward over the sink and letting the blood drip into the icy water. taking a handful of fresh water from the tap he spashed it over his face, breathing through his nose as he did, repeating this and repeateing the towels until the water that splashed his nose ran clear and the blood flow had been stopped rabbit's foot keychain on the desk by the bed, strange image flashing in his mind of his mother with a prosthetic leg elsewhere, the man in the labcoat monitored the images and scribbled notes, the serious, studied look on his face not betraying his elation at the progress he was making. the shrouded figure in the back of the lab slept on, unchanged and seemingly oblivious 020208 ... grendel it did not register on the machinery but the sleeper was dreaming - slow colorless dreams that looked like worn out videotape, news footage of some unseen catastrophe. "have to get away..." silently in the sleeper's head. The crescendo of bioelectric energy seeping from what remained of his brain coursing for the first time through muscles fed only by tubes and excercised occasionally by electric jolts in the other room, looking at the m onitor for a moment, the man in the labcoat was startled when suddenly the EKG and EEG in unison registered the twitch of muscle from beneath the shroud He was unsure whether to perceive this as a setback or an advance. suddenly things seemed very different In a forest, far away, in a small ruined shack, a raven tapped on a window... 020403 ... jessica this underappreciated bunny was hopping past a blue velour couch in front of an apartment building, when he met an octopus that spoke the native tongues of opapolopolus; his (the octopus', of course) fur was red. they danced up the apartment stairs, but the eight legs of the octopus tripped the bunny and they both fell to their s. 020515 ... god bunny got up off his s, and skittered down to the pay-phone near the local Pump N' Sump. if only he could get uncle jesse down here, he'd set things right again. goshdarnit. 020921 ... krimilda but uncle jesse couldn't show up, instead some nuns came running after a huge camel who had just escaped the knife of a purple butcher... the bunny ran after the nuns, he knew he could get them to take him to jamaica 020922 ... ... When He Came To a Stop he found someone blue, he asked him who he was. He just said "Uh?" He knew it was Brainy Smurf 021207 ... edith prickly RABBIT PAUSED... 021213 ... not narpf rabbit looked around, pausing just for a moment, and stopped to think about what was going on. He wasn't sure he liked where his thoughts were taking him, so he figured he would take himself to mexico 021213 ... cresentwhench The Bunny drove to tiajuana, smoked some marijuana, and drank some tequila. He had forgotten about the bacteria in the local waters, and half way through a dripper bottle, he relized he'd better get something to stop the diahreah. He went to Jesus (pronounced hey-suse) the pharmisist, down at the Grande-Mexicali Pharmacy and realized that his last name was Crappon. The man in the white lab coat had found him... 030101 ... thespacebetween variations on a theme is actually a song written origiannally by rachmaninov and the variation part is done by corelli no wait its the other way around anyway they use it in ballet classes alot its good stuff.. 031130 ... u24 classical composers often produce several 'variations', much like modern remixes found on singles. 031221 ... whitechocolatewalrus Anyway, Dr. Crappon was delighted at his discovery of the magical rabit. He grabbed the bunny by his furry, little tail, looked first left, then right. Seeing no one important, he ran out the back door. He had to get to the lab. Had to, had to, had to... mexican strees are dangerous. He spotted two scary men to the left. Unsure as to whether these men would be interested in this particular rabbit (because there was no way they could know of its powers, but Dr. Crappon wasn't willing to take any chances)he darted down the first alley on the right that he came upon. At the end of the alley there loomed a crazy large fence. Dr. Crappon slowed his mad paced run and quickly pondered his options. He could close his eyes and jump as high as he could with rabbit and all, he could toss rabbit over and climb the fence and hope that rabbit didn't run away, he could hold rabbit with one arm and climb the fence in a slow and grueling way. Damn it all! He closed his eyes and JumPEd! To his delight, he had somehow jumped on a trampoline built into the ground and flew high, high, high into the sky. Instead of coming back down and landing harshly on the ground, possibly killing himself and the precious magic rabbit, he landed on a cloud. 031221 ... birdmad again, outside the dream, the shrouded figure breathed raggedly. 040513 ... grendel As one of the attendants passed by the darkened room, the ruined fingers began to twitch. The computer monitors in the next room and the screens of the EKG and EEG machines went blank for a moment, and a silhouette of a man, wreathed in fire appeared for a few seconds 061020 ... birdmad The rabbit paused, feeling a strange jolt. In his mind, he saw a fleeting image of a forest in flames. 061020 ... Xipe Totec An old woman opened the window of the shack. The raven flew in and perched on the railing at the foot of the bed. a few delicate flakes of snow began to fall. the forest was nearly silent except for the faint whispering of the wind through the bare branches. 061020 ... jane rabbit was troubled by the image of the man. he only made out miniscule facial features, but they seemed achingly familiar. he struggled to delve into the deepest corners of his mind before realizing that he had progressed even further since the last bout of self-awareness. he realized that he had evolved to having a subconscious. 080417 ... grendel The rabbit waited the sheeted figure slept on The young man in the uniform shed a single, crimson tear, though he was not at all sure why 110125 what's it to you? who go blather from