random_thoughts 444605 she could have done it blindfolded. she knew it so well, nothing could stop her from completing her daily routine. and all she ever wanted was a kiss. but it never happened. why? nobody every asked her what she thought. all she was was a piece of furniture. a token on the mantlepiece. a speck of dust on the carpet. you would think with her stunning good looks, someone would notice her. or at least pay some attention when she said something. but no. she was just a brainless body. floating around in space. skateboarding is cool. i love watching extreme sports. my friend always calls me a 'skater wannabe' but its all good, because i know i am. i always tell myself that someday ill find the nerve to actually start, but im just bullshitting myslef. i know i never will. you hurt yourself too much, and i have a fairly low pain barrier. but i love to watch skaters though. the fact that they tend to be hot guys just helps. im more inclined to try snowboarding. that just looks like so much fun. its a pity its so expensive to rent snow gear and shit, but i dont mind. when i live in a country which actually has snow and mountains, snowboarding will be the first thing i do. i love all the tricks they can do. and if i ever learn what all the names mean, ill be quite happy. bmxing. that is another thing i love to watch. matt hoffman. too much pain involved for me to try though, but for some reason, i would be more likely to try this than skateboarding. i suppose its because im used to doing some fairly stupid things on a bike.so this wouldnt be new. how does everybody here know each other. am i the only loser who is antisocial, or am just missing something? aim probably. everybody has it. its stupid, and they have the most anoying advert on cnn. what about the people who dont live in america? u can prolly get it in europe, but dammit, thats just too much trouble. kill aol. what the hell is david doing? he has a cool voice. its kinda dead sounding(ie hoarse) and thats cool. i like people who have a fairly different voice from whats usually on tv/radio. i dont listen to the radio here. mtv is quite ok here. not quite as bad as in america. they play some fairly decent music, and once i saw a pretty underground band on tv. just outta the blues and i was like, 'HOLY SHIT!' i cant belive they are actually playing 30 seconds to mars. i love that band. i was pretty stoked about that.i think its so funny though, that mtv(in america) hardly ever plays any music. and carson daly is a fucking ass. so are most of the presenters actually, i cant stand their accents. and the day i listen to an american radio station for more than about 10 seconds is the day i shave my head. never. i dont understand how people can actually listen to that. it drives me crazy. ill go make some coffee now. 021206 ... unhinged i know i don't listen to it. but sometimes i get sucked into all the stupid reality shows that they play on mtv here especially the one about the sorority and the_osbournes. yeah; i think i would agree. the music industry in this country REALLY sucks. 021206 ... the godfather trilogy is out on dvd uuh...im bored. hello everyone. yes. here we go again, another friday night of boredom and depresseion. yeah. we closed school yesterday! im happy. but today was so frikin boring. dammit, my coffee got cold.bah. that always happens when i come on here, i lose track of time. yeah. hmm.. i dont actually have much to talk about. hm. i went to blather red today. i didnt even think about posting there. nah. i dont think my posts would be. right for there. and i dont care what people may say *looking at silentbob* thats like, 'the exclusive' blather. and i mean that in a good/funny way. thats for like, the veterans of blather. or for the people who post really moving peoms/whatever. yeah. me - im all about bitching about my life. and why i hate it. and anyway, i think blue is a much nicer colour for blather. =P so yeah. whatsup dudes! *burps* - this is when the caffiene(sp?)starts to kick in people! so. what else am i supposesd to talk about then? one of my classmates is having a new-years party. i kinda wanan go, but i genereally hate parties. so i dont want to know what's gonna happen if i hate it. and im also supposed to be going with my mum to visit some friends. and id feel bad for her friends, because they are kinda nice. and we'd already planned this ages ago. but still. fuck dude, my palms have started hurting from typing to much. blegh - blather is evil...its a strange feeling though - like, the inside of your palms, where it kinda bends/folds when you are typing. the creases near your thumb. yeah. strange. we might actually get a detention for skipping our last class. but theres alot of us who didnt go, so that would be a fun detention actually...it would be my first come to think of it. haha. im such a dork sometimes. i want new frames(for my glasses). the ones i have are kinda old. and i just want something new. different to be precise. dammit - i have 20 euros somewhere which i cant find. and its so annoying because i know its somewhere in my room - i just cant find it. bloody hell. ooh - fight club is on tv on sunday. niiiice. such an awesome movie. ha - edward norton --- good shit brad pitt --- good shit too haha, ok - im freaking out here for no reason. i always seem to have really long-looking posts. i think its cause i 'enter' alot. but thats mostly on long rambling posts like this, where every paragraph is like a new idea/thought goddamit! they are gonna be bringing all these other cool movies on tv around christmas, and i might not get to watch them. and trust me, theres hardly ever any good movies on tv here. so yeah. thats annoying. ok, this has been a seriously useless post, ima go then. lates 021220 ... the godfather trilogy is out on dvd man, i cant spell for shit nowadays...its so embarassing. and the little 021220 ... the godfather trilogy is out on dvd what the ???? it only posted half my thing. *gives blather an evil look* 021220 ... the godfather goddamit. and i mean that in a good way. its like - you just read a post. and its super depressing/really sweet/moving. and its like - wow. that was super beautiful/moving/emotional. what should i do? should i try and respond? yeah - but if i do, its gonna end up sounding wrong. then you feel like a dumbass. but i want to respond. at least to say that 'hey - dude, that was cool.' but you cant say that!?! i mean. not when someone was posting about something depressing. you know? bah. isnt this an annoying feeling. 021227 ... Rhin my car research is getting me nowhere! i want a honda, because honda's are the poo. however, i want a small, sporty car and the only one honda makes is a s2000, and there is no way in hell that i am going to pay 32,000 for a car that would disintegrate into a million pieces should an impact ever befall it! besides, like i can really afford that! so, what do i do now? buy used? ok, that's cool. honda made a del sol. it's a small, sporty 2-seater. however, they discontinued them in 1997 for a reason. reliable they aren't and leaky they are! maybe i should just nix honda. i'm not buying american, so don't even go there. what else is out there? the mitsubishi eclipse! not exactly tiny, but rather cool looking. i wonder if daddy would go for this? yes, my daddy's opinion matters here. i trust his judgement, given his background in auto mechanics. he's the poo as far as engines go. if daddy says no, then i agree. besides, he's my mechanic and if i buy something he hates, then he will refuse to work on it. he gets his stubbornness from me. i like the eclipse. i wonder if i can sell him on this? probably not. i'm not buying a damn 'family' car. i will NOT do it! ...and when did i begin expressing myself with words like 'poo' & 'bank'?! i have been hanging around my niece too much... she wants me to buy a bug, but they are just too cute-looking for my feisty nature. i want something that says 'get the fuck out of my way, or suffer the consequences of a semi-recovered road rager'! ::sigh:: ...and where did i put that list i made on blather? my list of things to do? i spent the time blathing it, so that i would remember them, and now i don't remember where i put it! that makes sense. someone just knocked on my door. i didn't answer it, nor did i even want to. it just reinforces my anti and/or asocial nature. bry keeps calling, and it's annoying me. i would have returned his call, but he has called 3 times in less than 1 hour, and his persistent 'talk to me now, or else' attitude turns me off in a way that i cannot even describe. actually, it's not him. i'm just moody again. surprise surprise. i'm soooooooo bored, even though i have a million things that i should be doing. i think i'm going to make pillows. i'm not exactly miss homemaker, but i have new cushions for my massive bubble-wicker furniture, and i refuse to pay out the heinie for pillows for it! no, nevermind. i can't make them. the sewing machine my mother bought for me (because every girl should know how to sew!) has mal-functioned. i knew from experience (my mother) not to ever alter the tension on the machine. so, i did just that...just because. damn! ::hmmmmmm:: okay, i'm just going to grab a new piece of canvas and paint something hideous, and then auction it off on ebay. i will bet that the more hideous it is, the better it will sell. sometimes, humans are just beyond sense. the balls in my galileo thermometer have all sunk to the bottom. this is interesting to me, because i'm freezing. how could the temperature be above 80? it's probably just me. i'm craving fish, which always means my iron is low, which equals my body temperature dropping. my hemaglobin is blue! blah blah blah... 021230 ... gmw that was me that just knocked on your door, i came to your house twice last night, and called you when i got home....i really need your shoulder right now, and you are ignoring me.....what did i do to piss you off?? 021231 ... Rhin i swear i had no idea that YOU were at my door! ...and i was going to return your call, but i'm not sure why i didn't. no, i know why. we haven't spoken (for some unknown reason) in almost a year. what are we supposed to say to each other? 'i'm sorry' or do we just pick up where we left off? we have been best friends for 17 years, and never gone this long without contact. it feels strange. i think i'm afraid that you are going to bitch slap me or something (lol). for the record, i'm not pissed. i've just been in a very bad mood for a year. what's going on anyway?! forget this. i'm calling... 021231 ... Rhin (for the record) i tried calling, but your line is busy... if you read this, do not respond, just call me! 021231 ... the godfather its annoying. i cant find one of my blathes. and its fairly pointless to blathe about it again. i just want to find it. bugger. 030102 ... minnesota_chris unemployed computer wizard do a google site search: go to google, click advanced. In the box marked Domain Only, return results from the site or domain: enter blather.newdream.net with no http:// and at the top, put in the words you're searching for, and your name (hogfather? godfather?) I think you'll find it... 030102 ... braindead godfather eh? im stupid. i dont get it. ill try anyway. 030103 ... Freak dried_tears 030103 ... een stom kind the shining is gonna be on tv again...haha, that movie is awesome dude! haha, it was actually on tv on saturday, but i wasnt really paying attention then, so i wanna watch it again properly on thursday..problem being its on at like 10 - and thurs is a school night..but ill just have a fight with my mum...im used to that. anyway. its wierd. ive bene spending all this time at red. i dont really like posting there, but i find the post there easier to read. its like, in a way, they are more complicated, but they are simpler for me to understand....if that makes any sense at all... or maybe its jut cause theres less posts on there, so i actually take the time to read them? im not sure... hey! we have coffee...i havnt had coffee for the last 2 days...i missed my coffee... anyway..i just wanted to get that out. so yeah. 030114 ... you dont know me i am so happy! i've lost 10 pounds in 2 weeks! and im going to continue losing weight. its making me so much happier and i can't believe i never did this before. 030114 ... Lilac hell is coming but I will survive. 030124 ... margadant11 How can you survive hell... 030124 ... god asbestos undies 030124 ... the godfather haha. yeah. im laughing at that last post before this. that was funny. yes. im on crack again. anyway. is it so bad to want to get revenge? people always say you shouldnt. im fairly religious, and they also say you shouldnt. but dammit - im sorry, but i always want people to get what they deserve. okay - im not phrasing that properly. what i mean is i get a great amount of pleasure in being able to say 'i told you so'. i really do. maybe im a bad person, i dunno. but i just love to prove other people wrong. and not just in real life. tv can be quite annoying in that respect, because you cant control it, but you really want to start yelling(or laughing in my case) at people when things go wrong. and you cant. its stresses me. anyway. im not quite sure i explained that properly, but hope you get the point. hm. i havnt really been on blue for a while. its so big compared to red. and coming across a couple of blathes which were cool. its interesting to see that she said shes changed alot. when i first read her blathes, i was like 'YO'. in a good kinda excited but shocked kinda way. especially when i thought of the fact that she was the same age as me. i was just in shock dude. i dont know why. i mean - ofcourse people are all different, growing up on different continents and so on. but when i would think; 'shes the same age as me. what if i was like that?' it was strange. in a good way. thinking of how different people can be. odd. i wonder what shes like now? well, its not really like i knew her then or anything though, but i just wonder what shes like now as compared to what little i know about her then. if i confused any of you. sorry. but it makes sense to me. so yeah. haha. i do that alot. i just go on about stuff which other people dont get. but as long as i get it, then its all good. ha. thats quite mean actually - but yeah, thats just me. woo - coldplay...aiight...good shit. and dammit. someone email me. its so depressing when you open you inbox and theres nothing there. 030304 ... Nathan88 i wrote on your cheek with the pen im writing with right now 030304 ... phil some people are just too serious. http://www.qsl.net/sars/sarspic/CHIA%20NYUK%20YIN.jpg 030304 ... een stomme kind blegh. stupid stomach, not working properly. what is wrong with you??? and im fucking tired man. i had to type out this suuuuuper long biology project....well, it wasnt that long actually, but well - i was sitting in an awkward position, and ive been spending too much time on the computer anyway. i need to exercise more. too much computer, not enough exercie...i feel rsi coming on. which isnt good. its pathetic how much i know about that. well, i have a reason to - but its a pity i dont actually take any of that advice. rsi=repetitive stress injury...hm, i thought it was repetitive stress syndrome. but anyway, its when you spend too much time in one postion - eg at the computer, then your right arm gets fucked from being in the same position the whole time cause of holding the mouse. and yeah. i can feel my arm hurting when i spend too much time on the comp. but i have shit to do basically. so yeah. i should be doing more exercise, cause that helps. but im a lazy ass. so yeah. anyway, stupid stomach isnt feeling too good. and i can blame it all on the stomach. yeah, cause i was doing a bio project on the digestive system - so i can blame it on the stomach - get it? ha. prolly not, but whatever. moving on. 030306 ... quissmo godverdomme - im like - cursed today or something...and its really annoying...nothing really important, just that all the teams ive been surporting on tv today have lost...damn bastards. i mean, theres was so much good shit on tv today. i mean, lots of sports for me, cause theres not much else on sautrdays. and all my bloody teams lost! well, except for arsenal, cause they drew - but dammit - the were leading until the bloody 82nd minute. cows. im pissed off now. yeah. oh well, replay in two weeks. but still, they could have won that so easily. argh. frustrations frustrations. sux0rs. hm. is it poosible to put a link to an outside website on here - which is actually a link? not where u have to copy it i mean. hm. i wonder. man, i hate gym. its stupid and evil. and portishead are good. yeah. hm. ouch. my neck hurts. 030308 ... Casey My room smells like potato chips. 030308 ... angie one time these one guys returned a bag of potato chips that they bought but had already been sorta opened in the back...i think it was just a packaging error or something...(um i work at a grocery store) so for some reason i smelled the chips after they had left and the reaked of cigar smoke! i didnt know chips could retain such a fragrance... 030310 ... Lilac scary_thoughts 030311 ... een stomme kind dude, how can some people come up with such..i dunno - 'deep shit'. and i mean that in a good way. but seriously, why is it that some people can find really...poetic and complicated ways to say stuff? cause thats just a skill i dont have. its wierd. i dunno. 030316 ... een stomme kind blagh. today is one of those days. and i dunno. it is, and its not. its almost like i want to get stuff out - apart from the fact that i have nothing to get out. and yeah. today was a pointless day. i miss my sister. fuck, i cant wait for the summer. shes coming to visit, and i cant wait. then ima go home when school is out, and for that one week, its gonna be the four of us. man, that is gonna be so good. we havnt all been together since 1999 dude. shiiiit. theres gonna be alot of fighting though. i know that already. but just being all of us. thats gonna be awesome man. i cant wait. its all ive been thinking about. especially since spring is coming, i just associate nice weather with her. and i know the perfect spot to go and sit during the summer and just maybe read a book, or just chill. and i might not actually get to share it with her, but fuck it. i cant wait for the goddamn summer. you have no idea. and stuff. i need to get away from here tho. sometimes i dont know how i get through. i mean, sometimes i feel like..i dunno - how people who are recovering addicts(or something like that) always say how you have good days and bad days. i feel like that. and its so annoying, because i know something that could make it better, but i can get it, and it annoys the fuck outta me. lord. ok. thats it. 030318 ... unhinged i've come to the conclusion that i am scared of this war. on september 11th, i knew it was inevitable. but for awhile it buried itself under other things. i am scared of this war because my brother is 17. i am scared of this war because the president of the united states is a fucking idiot. i could say that anyone who supports him is also a fucking idiot but that would be unamerican of me i suppose. in anthropology class a few weeks ago, my professor (who is french canadian) asked the class: "if you wanted to portray someone that was intelligent in a movie would you pick a texan?" and the girl that answered was like "no." and he asked her "well why not?" and as she shrugged he said "well they aren't all that smart are they?" and she shook her head. he was standing right in front of me and i said "but we elected one president." a bunch of people snickered. the republican fix for a bad economy is going to ruin all the foreign relations this country has. our president have the UN a big fuck you for christ's sake. and all these people over on the ivet messageboard saying they are glad that bush said that and they will gladly support war...what a bunch of assholes. they are all too old to get drafted if bush starts up the draft again like he was talking about a few months ago so what do they care. 'people in iraq need to be liberated' BUT THEY HATE US YOU DUMBASS. they don't want to be liberated by the united states. our evil capitalism is what makes them poor and that is probably not as much propaganda as a lot of red-blooded americans would like to think. and if we liberate them who will replace saddam? they all hate us anyway....george w. bush is a fucking asshole. and he can't speak english. americans get all up in arms when they hear stories of governmental brainwashing in oppressed countries....what do you think our media does to us? anyone that thinks that george bush is doing the right thing by going to war must be brainwashed. we will see when someone they love dies how much they support war. 030318 ... kx21 French Fries: The M_species which made the smoke in 1441 & caused the Regime Change of a kingdom... 030319 ... een stomme kind oh fucking hell...whoo...fuck...this isnt funny...i feel so wierd right now. anyway. i cant believe it took me this long to finally find out that they werent exagerating. this is like - the perfect album. its not even funny just how good it is, and it took me fucking forever to just download like, 2 songs which have forever changed my mind about them. damn. and yeah, i agree with what unhinged(i think) said about the war. and i agree more with what she said about bush. the guy is just...man, dont get me started on what i think of him. glad not to be american i think. aaaaaanyway. blah. 030319 ... antisocialbehaviour i think this thing ate my entry. or maybe i just didnt post it here..i dunno. strange... oh well. im back. after a long time. im tired though. i dont understand how i used to be able to spend entire nights just doing nothing on the internet. i feel like such an old lady cause i always go to bed early these days. anyway. 031128 ... divine madness why is it so? Just a thought from you and me... is it that eternity shall pass in a moment for time is nonexistant... time the man made prison, a jail cell that is disregarded everyday but really one become accustomed to it. Can it be that we may one day realize truly this paranoia in me and leave to a realm of deep meditation and finally fulfill that abysmal urning inside of me... just a question and a thought... or so ? 040114 ... cocoon * Theres so much music I need to download * I keep remembering things I want to talk about, and then forgetting them again * QAF episodes on my computer, almost and entire season that I need to watch * Need to buy blank cds. Burn my first cd * All the other ones Ive listened to have never been the same. They miss the trumpet bit at the end * My computer makes this annoying hiss/whine. I dont know why. Its practically new. * It also already seems to be having monitor issues. Dammit, I thought Dell's were supposed to be reliable and good quality? * Back of my neck itches. But I shouldnt scratch. Only make it worse. * Do they seriously think Im that stupid? * As far as Im concerned, my exams are over. * I feel like I should talk about it. Everyone seems to be able to do it. Everyone else seems to do it. So why cant I? * Trying not to think about the second half of my summer so as not to get too excited incase its not what I expected. * Should I reply? Or is it fine as it is? * Too much fucking time at the computer. This is what comes of not having a life. Now its actually taking a toll on me physically. Not funny. 040526 ... Syrope i like doing your...our laundry together :) i was hoping you'd leave my sheets smelling like you, but they just smell like iodine from your arm, but finding your clothes in my load from the dryer is almost as good. this could get dangerous. freecycle is so addictive. i could give away so much but i feel like i should be trying to sell it...or at least documenting it for a tax writeoff... i want to go to the beach. i have so much to do but all i've done today is clean, and it's great. i could do this forever. i might go to the beach after work, or i might just come home and clean some more baby powder makes floors really really slippery. they should put a warning on the bottle or something. seriously 050219 ... sahba random thoughts eh hmmm ahhhhhhhhhh oooooooooooooh ihhhhhhhhhhhhhhh lets see its 8: 04 am as i am stumbling on my keyhoard i have been up all day as usual doing nothing until i was akwne from my slumber by my guest/ friends mom ooooh wake up dear its 1pm la la la great you just killed me ahhhhhhhh yes its saturday now see we were supposed to build ramps but somehow suddenly everybody finds a girl on that very specific day and hour whereas theyd been trying for a better part of their live to do so if only god would have granted them their wishes a day earlier or a day later my ramps would have been in place and we would be happy dirt jumpers great so its a fundraiser lets go make some crappy coffee yay we run out of milk so geeta and me go get some yay we run out milk again ahhhhhhhhhh see this is when it starts to rain and you know when it rains in winter its getes COLD COLD COLD and driving around at 90kms is not very pleasent in the rain without a warm jacket and without a helmet specially since the rain stings in your eyes yes and now finaly its time to go back home] great so now my parents forget their car keys okay now your supposed to go all the way back and give them and yes the rain intensifies yay im drenched and im freezing great so now we sit there to wait for the rain to finish there was a movie "tears of the sun" bruce willis and monica belluci in some african war scenario pretty grim and really sad makes you want become the next koffi anan and end every possible war great so now we run out electricity yaaaaaaaaay now were cold wet and blind but noooo i wont go like that its time to go to fat guys place pretty nearby so you will only get drenched not really drenched which is pretty much the same though and yes what do we do there argue about wich mp3 player is better and then i play nfs till y eyes fall out only to put them back in and watch "taxi" so now its 7 am put as many pieces of cloth on me as possible and yes its fucking cold outside cooooooooooooooooooooooooooold i wonder you know if you could have a remote control for weather that would be nice yes that would be coz then you could you know do "stuff" and yes for breakfast banana's dipped in choclate sauce and now we come to its 8:16 am means ive spent aournd 12 minutes typing this since my eyes are blurry i cant walk straight from all that glaring into the screen adfha;sf as df asdf afalksidf la la la aooloooo liiiilil ioooah yes time to sleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep 050219 ... u24 is bsc related to the (now deprecated) acrs? 050527 ... Doar I wrote today... "Woe be to them that are as just as they have been". Wrap your noggin around that one. I can't. . 161012 what's it to you? who go blather from