what_i_always_wanted_to_be_when_i_grew_up monadh loved 010313 ... nocturnal taller 010313 ... mikey in love 010313 ... monadh something more 010313 ... mikey successful happy rich a pro soccer player a porn star 010313 ... monadh on the cover of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition *L* thank goodness I wasn't 010313 ... twiggie olympic swimmer a stripper at jake's (ok not really...jake's is yucky) happy a different person 010313 ... Rhinna A Ballerina An Olympic Gymnast 010313 ... silentbob an astronaut a construction worker a fireman a cop (read that as pig) a comedian an actor in a band 010313 ... startfires that's funny cause i always wanted to be a spaceship or a firetruck. 010313 ... johnny west A cool guy who wore dark sunglasses and always had girls around him. Instead, I'm a crazy guy who wears all kinds of glasses and always scares girls. Go figure. 010313 ... jem a rock star a veterinarian a teacher an actress a model a ninja and who says im not? 010313 ... Rhinna Princess Buttercup :-) 010314 ... mikey my dream also ..but its not a realistic one was always to be a knight. lay my cape down over a puddle so a lady could walk and not get her feet wet....etc.. chivalry. i love chivalry. these days you hold a door open for a girl or open a door for a girl she gets pissed and calls you a male pig or something worse....gotta love how life goes. im a mommas boy shes explained it but its tough when your a gentleman. i guess with all things theres a time and place for it. 010314 ... unique butterfly i always used to want to be a teacher. that was my dream when i was little. funny how dreams change. 010602 ... florescent light I've always wanted to be an actress or singer. Wanted to be on talk shows wanted people clinging on to my every word where everything I said would be greater than the breath of god. I still have that dream. But as anyone who has heard my singing can verify, that dream ain't happening. 010602 ... Casey Same with me, acting...i would probably be one of those actors who wouldn't stay in the chair. I would dance around making a fool of myself 010602 ... sweetheart of the song tra bong I wanted to write. I wanted to be a writer. 010603 ... Aimee Happy, a mommy, and a teacher 010716 ... yummyC famous. acting, singing, dancing, anything that gets me lots of recognition...and fans. now I know that isnt gonna happen so I'm thinking maybe psychologist of some sort or critic but i doubt i could succeed in anything in life, so I really dont know what i want to be. if i could be guaranteed ANY job, I would choose to be a professional skydiver or an actress. yeah. but since that aint happeniing, who knows... 010716 ... Sol until i was about ten i guess i wanted to be an inventor, have a lab hidden away and create wierd and wonderful things, i already had the receding hairline and the goggle glasses, but now im not so sure, id like to do simian behavioral studies at uni, but only cos i'd sound cool to say, "yeah i have a doctorate in simian behavioral studies" but i dont know, happy and enjoying life. making people happy and speculative, probably in art or music.......... 010716 ... nemo some one else 010716 ... kingsuperspecial regular 010716 ... silly I wanted to be an invisible thief, magician and things like that. I was the only one of the kids I knew that wasn't scared of strange things and the dark. 011031 ... nocturnal anything but a lawyer. off to law school I go. just a matter of years. 011031 ... dB I dunno. Alive is a good start. maybe then a butterfly. 011031 ... niki a pediatrician but then my older cousin decided to be one and everyone forgot about me now i want to be an actress so that everyone will know and remember me 011031 ... Sonya an animator an artist a writer a photographer an architect an archaeologist a paleontologist a singer a dancer a pianist a humanitarian worker a chef a bride, then wife a mother a grandmother an aunt happy fearless emotionally resilient and I always wanted to be sure that when I grew up I wouldn't lose my imagination or my wackiness, and so far I haven't lost either. :) 011031 ... anti-social butterfly in order of what i first wanted to be... an actress (a looong time ago) a singer a rockstar (secretly still want it) a writer a youth minister (was going through self-righteous phase) a teacher a professor (sociology, anthropology, or english) a psychiatrist a bride/wife a good mother a mentor a friend loved understood understanding and open-minded someone who somebody looks up/admires a wanderer a traveler in the peace corps (still going to be) poor making other people happy happy myself (i pray that it's possible) 011101 ... anti-social butterfly oh, i forgot that i originally wanted to be either jem (from jem_and_the_hollograms) or shera (as in shera and he-man) =) 011101 ... nemo i wanna be a wombat 011103 ... mmm a fishstick... oh wait, no. i meant....... i dunno.. 011104 ... Becky I wanted to be a doctor.. I'm not sure why.. I've always wanted to be doctor Piquette. 011108 ... Jenna a dancer a writer a singer an artist Then I went through my computer-programmer phase, which was completely random, and then: I thought I was going to be an artist for years and years. Now, at the cusp of actually being able to do something about it, I'm thinking, yeah, I could do that, but, music is my new love. I've been looking into concert photography, running light and sound boards, being a roadie or talent buyer or anything. This actually all stems from a secret desire to be a rockstar, and even though I can sing, I can't write songs, I can't play any instruments, and I have massive stage fright. I'm never going to be a rockstar. I have to settle for being close to them. 011108 ... jestification when i was real little......... a photographer for national geographic (so i could travel and take pictures).. i also wanted to be she-rah, but that was just a fantasy............. when i was still little but more grown i wanted to be a rockstar. now i just want to make stuff....... is my mental grown process set on reverse? 011209 ... girl i went through the she-ra thing and the thunder cats thing and the silver hawks (does anyone else remember that show??) and i did want to be a rock star (1st grade?) then i wanted to be a pro football player (or better the first ever girl football player)..3rd grade then within that year i decided i wanted to be a fashion designer seventh grade i wanted to be an actress and me and my best friend had everything planned out on how to get "discovered" and get to know the right ppl. 8th grade i got a thing in the mail about a pagent and then i wanted to be a model...i never competed in the pagent in high school i wanted to be an art teacher now im in college for a studio art degree and i still dont know what i want to be...a starving artist i guess? (oh here we go! i'll marry a rich man) i still have this wanderlust thing so as soon as i can i'll probably have sort of a nomad deal going on... oh lordy... my mom is 45yrs old and she says she still doesnt know what she wants to be when she grows up.. 011220 ... ClairE I never knew, and was puzzled that others did. I figured that that stuff just came along as my bones did, stretching me out without me noticing. Eh, I was wrong. Life is still as thin and lowdown as it ever was. I want to be content. But I just strive for happiness. 011220 ... Joana. A hermit, living poetically from the loneliness. Perhaps more in the mental sense than the concrete one. I always wanted to be a writer too, but sadly lack the required content. 011221 ... zerzura I wanted to own a fish and chip shop. That's right I wanted to work fast food. 011221 ... Toxic_Kisses A Vet A Are-q-tect A perfect speller Wise And finely a V(ictoria)S(ecret) Model 011221 ... evolutionending happy 020408 ... sabbie someone with lots of good socks and knickers. 020408 ... carne de metal johnny cash. 020409 ... jimmy ray lungfish the most_hated_blatherer 020409 ... vampers a ballerina 020409 ... werewolf a drifter a muppeteer a pro wrestler a comedian a writer a psychiatrist a sex therapist a lover a father a mother a carny a travelling man a translator odysseus a shoot fighter a poet a king some glorious hard work too a paleontologist (i love dinosaurs) and an actor in cheap b horror films 020409 ... A ♠ the stunt cock 020409 ... fall of a sparrow First aspiration at the age of four: Philosopher. Second aspiration a year later, after I've matured: Window washer. By far the best answer up there is Odysseus. 030513 ... metamantrg a happy person and I found it in the love of one special person .I LOVE YOU DEVIN 030921 ... nom grown up 030921 ... blah-ze something i never thought of. cos everything i thought of seemed mundane. 030922 ... x a teacher... and here i am 030922 ... User24 I never really knew, and still don't. 030922 ... oldephebe a english professor, or highschool english teacher before i got into music..there's still this inchoate ache, like there's this calling upon my life and i'm really overdue..i can't get into what that calling might be because aside from sounding delusional it's not quite something i've ever shared with anyone except for a 5 page typewritten letter to Mother..and she didn't even get it or read the entire thing..i think she said something subtly deprecatory like, "what letter..i remember getting a bunch of poetry from you or something"..and I was like "mom it wasn't poetry it was my heart bleeding and throbbing all over the pages"..she just sighed and dismissed my words as usual..oops I almost typed my real name..heh heh..but yeah we all do what we gotta do to pay the rent..but i'm still not doing what i was shaped, what i was born to do..maybe it has something to do with my watching my ego to make sure it doesn't inflate..so i hold myself in check..hold my self back..even had people say that to me as far back as high school and college..and no i'm not talking about music or anything..any way i've always felt uncomfortable being in a position of authority..weilding power and all that..subtly sabotaging my career and all that.. why in the world did i just reveal allll ...THAT!? ... 030922 ... misstree because it's truth, 'phebe, and that's what this place does. and for the letter to your mum, well, blood ties are like that, sometimes desperately misunderstanding us, but they'll always be there for us. i also am not doing what i was meant to do, "fulfilling my potential" as counselors called it, at least as far as occupation. i bounce from job to job, some lasting a month or two, none lasting more than a year and a half. i have a rather long and sordid list of job titles, with "waitress" appearing with distressing frequency. the one career that i dreamed of as a child, being a teacher (either english or sociology or both) has been beaten out of me by bitterness. some day i might like to run a coffee house, but that day is very far off. but in ways, i do fulfill my potential. they called me an "underachiever"... well, i'm a slack-ass at work and proud of it. my gifts show in my personal life, not the one that i rent out to someone for forty hours a week. i have weekend adventures so mind-wrecking that come monday i can't think. this is monday, isn't it? sheesh. 030922 ... misstree thinking about it, i guess that wild misadventures were more on my agenda than a career for day one... so i'm not doing too bad... 030922 ... x loved unconditionally oh fucking well 030922 ... oldephebe yeah blood ties..the painful relationship that never stops giving..family..hah..they'll always be there for us..you don't know my family nor i yours..but one thing i can definately say about my family..they will definately never be there for me..never have been..gotta love 'em though..gotta just assume a buddhist pose and not have any expectations whatsoever..so that on the off off chance that they do show a glimmer of empathy, decency, filial affection..it as well as thier odious (er wait odious implies a characterization, an emotional attachment or response..hmm)..okay as well as thier usual pose of strenuously composed distaste..or reticense..hmm..this sucks..it will just wash over you like tepid toilet water..okay so i haven't achieved an enlightened distance from my family..yet..but i'm getting there..my jaunt into a jaded state..yep..the old scar tissue is growing nicely over my heart..boo hyphen hoo.. ... 030923 ... misstree your family seems a lot more distant than mine, but i've always kind of held blood ties at a distance. i haven't talked to my dad's side of the family in nearly 10 years; no falling out, really, i just stopped going to christmas over there, and none of us cared enough to keep in touch. on my mum's side, though, everyone's a black sheep in some way or another, so there's at least affection for eachother. my mom's generation was pretty close-knit, too, but being an only child with no cousins within close age range, well, i guess i just never bonded. i can't imagine what it would be like for a family to be completely alien creatures, though. mine gives me funny looks and verbal pats on the head on occasion, but they at least acknowledge that i'm just a bit more of a black sheep than average. to have a family that didn't have that acceptance, that minor patch of common ground... man, 'phebe, i want to send you a puppy just so someone will show you the unconditional affection you deserve. tell your family i feel very sorry for them that they're missing so much from behind their walls. 030923 ... misstree and watch that scar tissue, man, it'll give you a heart attack some day. don't mistake it for a good thing. what you need is some cardiovascular excercise; harden it with strength rather than old wounds. 030923 ... celestias shadow when i was little i always wanted to be a teacher. since 5th grade i've wanted to be a writer. i want this with a passion i can't explain. writing is a part of me. i do it all the time, whether i want to or not. for me, writing is like breathing. but writing takes a talent i may never have. i would love to be a songwriter. a singer. i worship some of these people- i have never understood how some music can move me so deeply. i would love to be someone who could touch people like that. but again, that requires talent. i guess, all i can say now is that i want to be loved. and isn't that all we can ask for? 030929 ... oldephebe i've taught people to bring music up and out of their souls..sometimes it's just a matter of basic mechanics..and tuning the ear..i think every one has a beautiful song to sing..i would encourage anyone who wants to make music with words or with their voice,..umm it all comes out of the soul right?..so..look i have two sisters who have these amazing voices..so i never really sang because i held myself to their standard..i sang in the school choirs but really it was just to keep my sisters company..one day a buddy of mine encouraged me to audition for the honour choir..and around the same time my friends in the band began encouraging me to sing jazz standards and such..and once i started..this wonderful music that i didn't even know was there came out of me..sure i'm no where near as good a my sisters but this sound was all me..my own soul being made love to by the muse..giving me birth..in a baptsism of tears..to sing with your soul is to be wounded every time..at least that is how it is with me.. ... later ... 030929 ... white_wave i have some writing my parents saved from when I was in kindergarden. it said: When I grow up, I want to be a bigger child. It sounds kind of obvious and I was kind of a dummy for saying it. But I think i wanted to be a bigger child, because I wanted to grow in physical size, but always feel youthful. That is to remain a child at heart. And so I guess even at that age, I knew what I REALLY wanted to be when I grew up. 040222 ... cinzento A child. 040222 ... white_wave for what i really want to be, see Jenna's post. her thoughts closely mirror mine. 040222 ... nom funniness this 060808 ... LS An actor. 060809 ... Keil Some one apart, having some bizarre ability that shows exactly how unique I am and etc. Incredibly smart, being able to do anything with any technology made. Now I can't do much more than hook up a playstation. :) 060830 ... somebody I always assumed - mistakenly - that when I grew up, I'd be a Grown Up. 060830 ... grendel I wanted to be a priest until i was about fiteen, then i wanted to be an attorney, but all of the required courses was a math class i repeatedly failed (I have a savant's grasp of certain concepts, but it's not consistent enough to pass College Algebra) so, i dropped out and did all sorts of stupid shit for a few years. I wanted to be a forensics technician and work for the local crime lab, but apparently, the fact that i've ever done LSD and the years i spent as a junkie are permanent disqualifiers for such a position (because admitting these things honestly is apparently not enough of proof of good faith and character to get the job) so i dropped out again and now i'm a faceless bureaucrat with a moderate background in IT and tech support and i'm reasonably happy with it 060830 ... pSyche i always wanted to be able to still have fun, and not have one of those boring jobs with a boring life, with a boring husband. 080202 ... Bree When I was little it would change. From a vet to a fairy princess. Then it was to be a weapons engineer in the Navy. But I failed half of my physics papers. So that idea is gone. I also want to be a mum. A wife. Like that's going to happen any time soon. Now I just want to be thin. 080203 ... Lemon_Soda Sure of Myself 080203 ... falling_alone a ballerina until i discovered i hated dancing. a fashion designer when i was ten. an artist at 11. a wizard through 15 to currently... but a wizard doesn't earn an income, so i fell back on the notion of being a fashion designer, hm still going. 080205 ... minnesota_chris The world is filling up with places in which I do not fit. I'm wondering if there is any place in which I will be happy to work. 080206 ... olive a dinosaur and a firetruck, my cousin told me later when i was 18. we laughed and imagined how it would be if firetrucks were people too. 100106 ... epitome of incomprehensibility Usually a writer, though when I was five I wanted to work at McDonalds because I thought I'd get free food and toys. Hmmm.... 100106 ... unhinged a writer a violinist 100106 ... rgo I wanted to save the world....bit of a Jesus complex...never got to the planning stage. 100106 ... freezerkitty Actress, model, singer. My aspirations were crushed; I could never be anything big. Anything that involved time put in by my parents. Then I didn't want to be anything. I guess I've succeeded. 100107 ... lunatic jesus I always wanted to go back and try again with what I know now. Or Superman. 100107 ... . . 100107 ... n o m life is pretty funny 130216 ... n o m "artist or a model or a fashion desighner" - star_stickers 130216 ... Doar when I was older. to grow towards. . 130216 ... in a silent way the more we change, the more we become who we always really were. 130217 ... unhinged a writer 130217 ... thieums Alive 130326 what's it to you? who go blather from