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minnesota_chris
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Neal Boortz
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It would seem that the Neal Boortz bobblehead doll has attracted the interest of a young Afghan girl in Kabul. Also, if you could see the enlarged picture you would note that his golf club is broken. Probably the work of the Taliban who outlawed golf and cancelled the PGA Tour stop in Afghanistan when they took over.
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021212
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minnesota_chris
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fuck you. you're really pissing me off.
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021212
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SuicidalAngel
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I dunno - is it supposed to be funny?
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021212
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unhinged
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i haven't forgotten that you wanted a picture. i haven't gotten them from my friend yet. soon. smile. it's just blue words.
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021212
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doc holleytruck
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i want to cover your writing in fudgy bananas
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021213
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gay gizmo
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let me just take this time to profess my undying love for minnesota chris...i dunno what it is...just somethin about ya that always keeps me coming back for more!! :)
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021213
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minnesota_chris
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um... that's... sweet.
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021213
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p2
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"yes, yes, very sweet... for me to poop on!" - triumph, the insult comic dog sorry, the fudgy banana comment made me do it
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021213
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jimmy hoffa
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Boo!
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030127
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minnesota_chris
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shit it's jimmy hoffa back from the dead, to blather about me!
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030127
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minnesota_chris
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this page is just weird. Not an artsy literary sort of weird, more of a "dream with no pants on" sort of weird.
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030127
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Arwyn
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well, you ask me on a different blathe how mommyhood is treating me... I'd say fairly. I mean, I really don't feel pregnant or anything (aside from the nausea and being tired all the time). I just feel like i have the flu... :)
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030128
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minnesota_chris
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my brother and sister-in-law just had a kid, like a week ago. They're home now of course, recovering (c section). They are still in shock about it... once in a while they hear him cry, and think "oh my gosh, where'd that baby come from?"
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030128
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Arwyn
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lol... now that's a beautiful story... I heard one really bad morning sickness story from a friend.. i guess she was at work and had to go to a big meeting, but wasn't feeling well, told her boss, but he said (just like a man) you have have to be there... so she went and within five minutes she threw up all over the conference table... needless to say she went home... I'm so happy I haven't had that kind of trouble... but good lord is that sad... in a funny way
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030128
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minnesota_chris
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that's hilarious! Sally, is there something you want to add? URRRFFFFFF
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030128
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spoons
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I had a dream about you last night... It was really really weird... especially considering you have no idea who I am and I no idea who you are The weather was perfect all damp and rainy. I was carrying a bag, and I was just walking past this restaurant and through the window I caught sight of you out of the corner of my eye. And I was just like "OMG MINNESOTA CHRIS!" and threw myself up against the glass. Then you looked up and saw me so I ran in becuase I wanted to meet you cuz its a hey i sorta know you from blather thing... So i ran in to go meet you but you got this horrified look on your face and you just took off running you were running into people and jumping over tables just to get away from me... then I was sad and when i finally lost sight of you I just turned around and left... everyone pretended nothing happened...and im just like YOU DONT GET IT! THAT WAS MINNESOTA CHRIS! The End
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030220
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minnesota_chris
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that happens to me all the time. I have a press agent.
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030221
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:-*
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is the coolest. no better way to put it.
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030221
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:-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-* :-
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I want to give him many mini kisses.
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030325
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...too scared to leave a name...
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minnesota_chris could be really really cool, he's really funny sometimes, but there's just something about him that seems downright scary, and not in a scream 2 way, more a norman bates way. Sorry.
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030509
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User24
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lmao@above comment! I must register my disagreement, here and stick up for a fellow blather_hacker you rock!
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030509
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minnesota_chris
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I am downright scary. Blahhh!!! Come here little girl. Yesterday and today I was teaching first graders. I'm not sure how this relates to me being scary. I guess I was kinda scary when I was threatening to send notes home to their moms. I can be pretty creepy and annoying when I'm feeling lonely.
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030509
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User24
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minnesota_chris > look at funshiney_test_page it is fixed.
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030517
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minnesota_chris
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ta very much, you're a diamond geezer.
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030517
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somebody
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you are a rock, and one that is needed for many people. you deserve to be happy.
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030625
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elimeny
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hahahahahaha.... that is frightening, i know i wouldnt want to be a first grader in your class... "nooooo mr minnesota_chris! please dont send a note home to my parents!!"
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030824
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minnesota_chris
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*scowls at the little brats* GRRR they all wanted to sit in my lap.
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030825
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elimeny
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who wouldnt? hehehehe
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030829
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trustme
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plenty
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030829
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whitechocolatewalrus
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Hi! Just thought I'd say "hi minnesota chris, how goes it for you? hopefully splendid." Anyway, yes, I have this cool story for you. Do you want to hear it?...Oh, probably not. Oh well, maybe some other time. SEe yOu sooN:)
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031216
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pipey
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made me my ask_pipedream page, and showed me that cool google thing, and sent me my first e-mail from a fellow blatherskite. chris is me blather godfather :D
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031217
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minnesota_chris
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(with stuff in his cheeks) I'll make ya a blather you can't refuse... Oh, and as long as we're typing lowbrow nonsense, what is your story?
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031217
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whitechocolatewalrus
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Haha, okay, if you really want to hear it. It goes like this.... there was once a sheep who had this friend named hippo. hippo and sheep did everything together. i think they even went ice skating one time, but that's besides the point. anyway, hippo and sheep decided that they wanted everyone to knew about the wonders of flying. (this was back in the day before birds and stuff, yeah..) they would find a tree that looked easy enough to climb, but they wound't climb to terribly high. they would tip toe out to the end of the branch, usually sheep would go first because sheep was made of wool. sheep would JUmP and flap her legs as hard as she could and float gracefully to the ground. hippo was always in awe of sheep because his descent was always a bit more... rough. hippo would take a really long time standing at the end of the branch so that he could muster up enough courage to take the flight. he would always land with a bit of a boom and a shake. one day hippo and sheep invited all the rabbits and dogs and ferrets and other animals out to the tree field and did hours of demonstrations. from that day on you would see all types of animals flying out of trees, thus the creation of animals with wings. the end.
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031217
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pipers
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yeah, so what did the walruses do then? huhuhuhuhuh? and the octopus and the yellow submarines, submarines have feelings too you know..
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031218
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whitechocolatewalrus
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walruses are grey and sleep all day, but that is another story entirely. yellow submarines didn't exist because, remember, this was in the time before birds, get it? and for the octopi, they of course are not pink, as commonly assumed, but black. they originated from the underground, but as the water kept flowing and expanding, octopi discovered that they liked the way the water felt on their outer shell and abandoned their underground abode to live in the water. this would exlude them from the tree jumping/flying demonstrations because they had never once set a tenticle on land before. fish can fly though, but this would all be explained in the other story that the grey, sleeping walruses refer to.
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031218
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pipedream
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there have always been yellow submarines, i have a fossil to prove it too! the submarines used to live in caves and ate only twinkies, but then they got bored of that when they were trying to get jiggy with one particularly foxy octopi and decided to camp out in the water for a while. the wooer submarine did, and he liked it so much that he invited his family to stay, and the rest as they say, is history. or herstory. mbwahaha.
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031218
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miss... er just some random anonymous person
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chris, do you speak russian?
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031219
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minnesota_chris
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*stares at you in a daze* octopi... twinkies... jimmy_hoffa... Um. Hi. Yes I speak Russian, miss anonymous person with a black x on her lips. Shto tebe nado (what do you need?)
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031220
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mt
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dangit! i shoulda made you speak russian to me. darn my negligence. bah. (i just love hearing the language. 's yummmy.)
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031220
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endless desire
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ooooooooooooah!
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031231
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endless desire
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oh i am so entertained
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031231
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minnesota_chris
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so call me already. I got this cool Minnesota postcard to send you.
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040103
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endless desire
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id call you but you wouldn't understand a word i said. i'll wait until the swelling goes down a bit more. wisdom_teeth
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040103
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randomly recent
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dressed as buddha. !
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040128
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octopi wearing twinkie suit
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can i bite you?
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040128
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minnesota_chris
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I am at peace
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040128
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oldephebe
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So you have seen the other side of soy eh? whoooo methan clouds a rollin' cross the desert sands...hmm gastronomic or rampant lower intestinal discharges in the pursuit of a clean colon and a heart and arterial thoroughfares scoured of all or most impediments..cholestoral..acclusions.. man..what a price!
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040128
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minnesota_chris
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not quite so bad, I guess... I only use my home brew soy milk when I want to eat cereal... real milk will give me much worse gas actually this page gets worse and worse. Anyone know a booger joke?
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040128
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pipers
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oh oh, i do! there's this cave where a cannibal lives, and nobody's ever had the guts to go explore it, so one day an intrepid indy-aspirer decides to go check it out. so he goes into the cave, and he hears a voice echo- 'im gonna getcha, im gonna eatcha' eerily. he's really spooked, but goes on. again, the voice echoes through the cave. knees quaking, he advances into a pool of light where he sees...a boy, digging around in his nose, and telling the 'treasure' he finds 'im gonna getcha, im gonna eatcha'. *canned applause* heh
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040128
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booger joke lover
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eh heh heh
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040128
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minnesota_chris
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yay! pipedream is always good for a booger joke when you need one.
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040205
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pipers
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hahaha glad ta be o' service :D
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040206
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christopherlevesque
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Isn't this the worst website...i mean, as far as organization goes... You never get to see whether someone has responded to your blathes...i have too many to count...anyway.
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040206
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minnesota_chris
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it's not a message board, it's a writing website. So it's better for writing, and worse for communication.
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040206
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dosquatch
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Did you ever get the rest of my answer about the underscore and apostrophe thing?
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040530
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u24
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Your comments often make me laugh. for the right reasons. just thought you should know. :-)
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040621
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minnesota_chris
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thank you! I know I'm not the most creative person on here, and I'm not a great writer. All I can shoot for is amusing.
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040621
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sameolme
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I'm amused, thanks. Where is tree?
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040621
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minnesota_chris
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I have her locked in my basement! No, actually she is in Colorado till winter. She wrote about it in letting_go.
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040621
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u24
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not amusement as in funny. your comments often have two meanings. your wisdom often shows in them. I think you are easily mis-judged.
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040624
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