how dare this land be called America in a blather where there is no blather with birdmad.
ducky True, but there are the ever famous; grendelbirdmad and imissgrendelbirdmad. 000904
florescent light Today is Birdmad's Birthday!

I will refrain from telling his age.

Happy Birthday Birdmad!

celebrate it well.
birdmad ~~dammit, you're makin' me blush~~~

like any good drunk born under the sign of pisces i'm celebrating it a day late by going to a big art show and getting really wasted this very afternoon

i 'll be back
laura hi, you're quite interesting. i just wanted to tell you that i thought so.
i picture you like a raven in a long black coat, under a grey sky, walking through a field to jump a barb wire fence to walk on an empty country street.
birdmad ~~~does best elvis impersonation~~~

thank you, thankyaverymuch.

i spend my time in the framework of the city

between the lowest of the low and the corridors of power

waiting for the rain.
god i read some of his stuff. a loss to blather 010805
nocturnal we'll miss you. do visit us often. 010805
unhinged he's been here the whole time. it always saddens me to see the long time customers leave 010805
mmm BEEFY! from what i've seen, this would mark the second time in almost exactly a year that the first week of august saw some unexplainable drama which ultimately resulted in someone leaving

now that's just weird.
Gollum I'm hiding in your laundry basket. 010806
sliver suffering from puncture wounds
let us all worship blather's new jesus fucking christ
)-( can we crucify him on his front door?

give us barabbas!
fairydust wait- birdmad's leaving?
i'm a little confused here.
birdmad gave me something to write back to a long time ago, thus sending me on an enjoyable train wreck of words spiraling about my mind, and let it be known i am grateful
birdmad not gone just not really here either 011003
nocturnal he couldn't leave if he tried - I know cuz he has tried, and just look at him. quite the junky, I must say. 011003
silentbob i made out with him in his camper. he told me i was the best. 011004
blurred-mad say what?

i must have been tripping, i don't remember that.

wouldn't surprise me though.
silentbob You said i was great *sniff* 011005
blurred-mad sporting the three day hangover i don't doubt it 011005
CheapVodka i like him...i think he'z way neato 011110
birdmad the song by the_cure from whence i took this name: (except i'm not a girl so i left that part out)

"birdmad girl" (smith/tolhurst)

This girl has got a smile
That can make me cry
This girl just burns with love
She's burning burning deep outside
Night time night time
Sets my house on fire
I'll turn into the melting man
I'll lose my life
To feel I feel desire

Oh I should feel
Like a polar bear
Like a polar bear
It's impossible

She flies outside this cage
Singing girl-mad words
I keep her dark thoughts deep inside
As black as stone
As mad as birds

Wild wild wild
And never turn away
Sends me all her love
She sends me everything
She sends me everywhere

Oh I could be
A polar bear
Oh I could be
A polar bear
But it's impossible

I try to talk
The sky goes red
I forget
So fill my head
With some of this
Some of that
Some of every word she said

Oh I should be
A polar bear
But it's imposible


"the polar bear was a symbol (zoo-wise) for me of insensible savagery caged to be stared at. or something like that...? "
R. Smith, December 1990

and apparently robert_smith got the idea from a dylan thomas poem:

Love In The Asylum

A stranger has come
To share my room in the house not right in the head,
A girl mad as birds

Bolting the night of the door with her arm her plume.
Strait in the mazed bed
She deludes the heaven-proof house with entering clouds

Yet she deludes with walking the nightmarish room,
At large as the dead,
Or rides the imagined oceans of the male wards.

She has come possessed
Who admits the delusive light through the bouncing wall,
Possessed by the skies

She sleeps in the narrow trough yet she walks the dust
Yet raves at her will
On the madhouse boards worn thin by my walking tears.

And taken by light in her arms at long and dear last
I may without fail
Suffer the first vision that set fire to the stars.
sabbie .:blinks in surprise:.

you know, i really wish i would read things properly, instead of scanning them and jsut assuming i know whats going on.

i have read 'birdmaN' all this time. how fuckin insane!

now im paranoid. i know there are heaps of other stuff out there that ive made weirdass assumptions about.

sabbie lives in a world of her own creation. adam might have named the animals, but i name the players on my own stage.

i think i might turn the sky blue today
sabbie the ever (non?) assuming .:wanders dazedly off singing a little song about gremlins:. 020204
who the fuck are you? who the fuck am i? this has really worried me. maybe i should take a rolecall of all the people i think are on blather.

maybe im not sabbie afterall?

gods... i wonder who i am then...
C_ _ _ _ d_ m_ _ _ _ know you are j_ _ _ _ _ MC _ _ _ _ _ _ _
give us $32 and I won't say a word.
CDM so? 020304
peter pannick oh boy! If I were you, I'd pay.... 020304
silentbob close_to_me 020304
sabbie oh no... my secret identy as james macgyver has been discovered! i must flee! 020421
god i never knew you were writing a novel. 020526
freakizh pajaro loco, maybe? 020527
Dafremen Sup fatboy? (I call my son fatboy (no he isn't chubby either) I'll have you know, and I happen to LOVE you are a fondly thought of character in this blather_book, like it...or NOT.)

Anyhow, thought I'd pop in and let you know that you are fondly thought of.
birdmad and may the force be with you too, daffy 020527
boils rabbits once again, i light in your branches,
a reversal,
in drunken a-mused moments....

yes, you are an avatar for a god which is not yourself.

but gods do not choose lightly.

the things that in this moment i would like to do to your flesh
must not be described in the presence of such young thoughts,
though i think that you would find a scarlet familiarity
with the realtions of sex_and_violence,
the saliva sting in a fresh wound...

no, to relive that
would bring us too close to times past,
but tonight, i will share with you
the taste of razor tongue,
the feel of icy nails in moment's heat,
because you are the avatar of such thoughts,
because you have them contained within you,
and at this moment,
the thought that you may be an unwilling participant
is all the better.
boils rabbits relive = believe.

screwdrivers. lots of them.
perched amongst the powerlines colour me flattered.

perplexed, and even a bit stunned. but flattered enough to feel a definite shiver along my spine

yes, even if this flight of fancy was conjured in the vapors of a few screwdrivers, and would likely evaporate just like the volatile spirits that provoked it (which of late would be apt enough)... yes, my feathers are appropriately ruffled

thank you very kindly
birdmad hdgfhbdjlasbfdbs 030205
irritated bird in reference to the previous post:
what the fuck is this shit?
User24 is a real hoopy frood who knows where his towel is. 030509
Dafremen Will a letter addressed to still reach you? If not..would you email me? It's important.(?) 030717
birdmad it'll get there 030717
workin bird of course i won't see it until i get home from the office, though 030717
Dafremen Sure. Hog all that employment for yourself! 030717
misstree reading you after silent hill is somehow more disturbing... 030821
z your work is consistantly beautiful. i find myself in awe of the complexity of the imagery, the literary and cultural references, the language and the ideas. i always read your work. thank you for it. 040709
. cool hair 040811
birdmad cool hair?

hmm, i didn't really think so, i was just seeing if i could get the half-dead digital camera to function.

with the humidity of the half-assed storm that was brewing overhead when i snapped the most recent pictures of myself, it was only moments later, even after repeated brushings and combing to tame it, that i was sporting what i commonly refer to as a "mexican afro" in that it was not as tall or nappy as the super-sized blowout afro that you might see Ludacris wearing in some of his videos, but it was pretty damn close.

when it's this long, i prefer it when i can get it to fall as straight as possible
u24 how's the tarot coming on?

I was looking at:

and thought you might be inclined to send your artwork.
god birds
i couldn't let her eat that bird
i couldn't let that happen
misstree you've been in my thoughts lately.
strange days, o addled avian.
i'll toast to you in my next excess.
flap flap swoop splat (ow) heh.


(of cource it is always much nicer to be flatteRed than flatteNed, so do know that i sure ain't complainin')
Grendel (O! O! O!) eet's friday, i've had a weird week weirded out, tired and my glucose levels are still loooooow from the craptacle that was yesterday


I told my little friend that, well-intended though he may think he is, if he doesn't back off for a bit i'm gonna make sure someone spikes his KY with menthol and Ben-gay

(Down goes the whirlpool Eek! no, no)
gja Hey you - birdmad. Would you turn if someone called that on the street?

Firstly, great name - from what I read that name is perfect. Wouldnt the world be even more interesting if we could choose our real life name?

I have been rooting around blather for a while now - blathe a bit and read lots more - I go through phases of seeking out certain blatherereres or topics.

And, I often, and recently come back to you.

Youre fine. I mean really fine. Fine is the word for you.

I read a blathe of yours that got me big time - it was a scene - you and some comrades eating watermellon during (after?) work. It was simple and lovely and I read it over, twice. Thanks for that.

Anyway I am not all yours - I am not that kind of guy - I am down with you.

There is lots of angsty sort of Molly Ringwaldish stuff here sometimes - but you get past it, and add a more "grown up" and clever perspective.

I know that sounds patronising. I dont mean it to - I mean I wouldnt be here if the gems didnt shine frome the ore, huh?

That sounds patronising too. What I mean to say is that you are a noticable extra bright glint in a glowing pile of jewels and bright stones.

So cheers. And, if I dont get distracted on the way I'll try and remember to give you my UPS on red too.

1) I think we may be about the same age.
2) I am sure you would like and enjoy (tolerate at worst) the indomitable, pared back and insigtful voice of Mr Raymond Carver.
3) I should make a blokey joke now so no one gets the wrong idea.

Cheers Birdmad
grendel/birdmad oi, thanks, man 070628
Doar thank you man. it's good to hear from you.

heard somewhere....probably from you...that you are a lean mean kitty machine now.

keep good care of you and yours my friend.

bird landlord busted me for having too many cats, had to scramble to find new homes for the little ones, but i think i did well in the homes i found... I miss the mischief, but i'm enjoying the sleep that comes with not being a launch pad, a back-stop and occasional bite-force test target for a litter of young fuzz-nuggets 090428
grendelbirdmad that, and, yeah...

i'm a rather slender bastard now
.angry you_are_busted 101114
irritable bird i'd be busted if i was the one plastering stupid shit all over the recent page, but i'm not, so do take that shit elsewhere.

fuck through.
Ouroboros handsome, if i may say so 130627
epitome of incomprehensibility I wish I had a contrary cat as a muse, but people in the same dwelling-place as I have cat allergies. I miss my Ontario cat.

Did that have anything to do with birdmad? I don't know, but hello.
Phil The voices never stop
They get louder and louder
Their meanings, whatever they are
Are an Ill omen
You may win them over
And sort them out
But nothing stops the Ocean
Phil My mind uses words to switch emotions. 140705
unhinged i hope you and all the felines are well; i will be near phoenix soon. i always think of you when that happens



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