what_does_sex_mean_to_you Syrope "we just had sex...and it meant nothing to you" "it's just a neat interaction between people...what is it to you? i don't think we're using the same definition of something "meaning" something" "it's a manifestation of desire, and you can't just calmly desire someone" "yes you can" "it's not the same" the sad thing is most people i know won't be able to tell which of those voices is mine... its not fair that just feeling the grooves of your fingerprints run across my skin can make me feel so beautiful, but the way you think about me can make me feel so dirty and hollow. 030314 ... megan deep emotion too deep to be played with lightly... it is true you can drown in desire in my humble opinion, best saved for marriage 030427 ... sixteen it means firstly it is a basic carnal desire then it can progress to a shared connection, combined with the manifestation of desire.. and lastly it can be Love, from love, leading to love, resulting from love, or expressing love. There are different levels of sex. I am fully capable of having sort of meaningless sex. I have myself a fuckbuddy. He's firstly a fuckbuddy, secondly a friend...and we both know what we want and we both feel secure in our quasi-relationship. As long as nobody is confused or has higher expectations, i think a purely physical relationship can work out. Then there is the sort of sex that happens sort of accidentally...between real friends, just because the attraction to one another is so great--and its hard to determine where friendship-love ends and romantic-love begins. Then... there is real sex, that you MEAN with your body, soul, and mind...and I don't think an explanation is really needed. 030427 ... a desolate bird I can't separate body from mind and soul like i used to. for years i could let the body have total control leave everything else behind. but that isn't me anymore because of this, i've gone a lot longer without it than i care to be specific about 030427 ... cube A great diversion and something to always look forward to. ... 030428 ... unhinged it used to be this accidental collision, violent even maybe physically and definitely emotionally. they all begged or took it from me. i had begun to feel abnormal. i just wanted to be normal so i let them do what they wanted. so i would find myself in this drunken situation with someone i barely knew, thinking 'hey maybe this time you'll be normal' and i hated it and i hated them. they were both shocked to hear me say that i had never had an orgasm because of someone else. but it was something i had learned to live with in the two years that i had been having sex. even though it was a biannual occurence, the more it happened that way, the more i began to felt assured that it would always happen that way. until a couple of months ago. he was the first person i ever had sex with more than once. he was the first person that i grew to love even more because of his want to make me feel good before he made himself feel good. and i think that all the past before him still stops me from being completely happy and because he can't make me orgasm all the time it makes him feel inferior. i wish that i could explain to him about all of it before him. i tried once but i thought that over the telephone wasn't the right way to say it. i know that i am a lot farther down on his list than he is on mine; i don't care about that as long as we are both disease-free but i think it is a little odd to him. i don't want to be odd. i just want to be normal. and i am beginning to think that sex as an expression of love is normal. i used to say that i could never have sex with someone i love. i guess i have moved past that. 030618 ... splinken It's a way to get to know someone better. 030618 ... drstrangelove disaster emptiness wasted money shadows of a potentially beautiful time intimate conversation with a phone lover when you dont know the language being spoken it shouldnt be this way not this way susan powder says stop the madness 030618 ... pobodys nerfect For me,it would mean that I felt pretty serious about the guy, because I've been a virgin for such a long time. I'd never even consider having sex with someone that I didn't want to try and have a serious relationship with. That would sort of defeat the whole purpose of all those years of waiting. If the day ever comes,I want "the one" to know that I chose him because I love him THAT much and if I'm lucky,it'll be forever. 030618 ... x it means someone else getting what they want 030618 ... Mr24 lol.. too true. 030804 ... drstrangelove less and less thx to u whats luv got to do with it everything rite anything u want u got less and less i really have no idea anymore take 2 vicadin and call me in the am 030804 ... misstree narrowed to casual sex; a meating of flesh, your skin under my fingernails a tropy, i want to bathe like a cat in self-satisfaction afterwards. each will have a different opinoin of who is conquered, but each will walk away with nose high and tail swishing, and a special kind of light that flashes when eyes meet. or i'm bored. and lonely. and horny. and you're bored. and lonely. and horny. and i like the way your hair falls over your eye, and you can keep up with me in word play... sure, why not. it could be fun. show me your secrets and i'll tell you my tales. or stupid lug... i brought him up here for this? a year ago i would have given lessons, but now i just discard the useless ones. i'm bored... hope he finishes soon, he's not even real enough to be mean to. i wonder if i remembered to put the milk in the fridge... 030804 ... silent storm love 030804 ... niska in a relationship, it's the absolute closest we can possibly be to each other, physically. out of a relationship, it means there's at least one thing i like about the guy, at that time being... depends who it's with and why i'm doing it, i suppose. 030804 ... Aimee My first time was just to get my virginity "out of the way". I actually hated the guy I slept with. I hated him for being a selfish prick and I hated him for the way he had me lose my virginity. The next time it was for love. I loved him so much, and all I was was a piece of ass to him. I never respected him again and I wouldn't allow myself to love him... but I still did. The last person I was/am with has almost always been for love. It's about us expressing our love to each other. It's intimate, and there are nights I still start crying half way through because it scares the hell out of me that someone would love me that much. Why should he? 030805 ... anger he fucked her..meant everything to him and nothing to her,she broke his heart. 030806 ... BigGlen A woman. Just like a woman. Separates her sex from her love. flighty. flightfilled. something happens. lover. betrayer. she leaves their love for sex. love now becomes three. three people. sex. love. betrayal. Nothing lasts anymore. I'm supposed to take you for granted you Bitch. I trusted you. I loved you. 030806 ... Dafremen Sex and love are only loosely related. The association of sex to love is a relic, a throwback to another time when people waited YEARS to fall in love, then later, in the depths of that trusting, loving relationship, they had sex. We have reversed the roles of love and sex and chosen sex for its ease of acquisition and the simplicity with which it can be given. Our generations have grown up in hollow emptiness and a world of love by proxy. Most of us have little or no idea what love really is. So we go with the first squishy feeling related to the opposite sex. "Must be love.", we surmise. It isn't. It's just another exercise in futility that will end with two human beings being less capable of a loving relationship than they were before. Our sick twisted lustlove "relationships" crank out cold predators and stone hearted bitches by the millions these days. Sex. Yay. 030806 ... misstree takes a strap-on to society Yes, and along those same lines our obsession with this pleasurable placebo for meaningful human contact has seriously screwed up our views of eachother, women feeling like meat and obsessing over appearance, men feeling inadequate to get the meat they are raised to obsess about having (but i've got my bud light... now all i need is a babe and i'll find Nirvana!), the way most people closet away reams of issues which fester and rot and make them unhappy because they can't tell their mate they want them to dress up like a construction worker and do them up the butt... yes, daf, casual sex churns out bitter predators with no sense of intimacy. I'm serious, I agree. I myself am a bitter predator (and proud of it, thankyouvermuch), and we'll leave my debatable sense of intimacy out of this. But this is not the fault of sex, nor is it the fault of sex being readily available. it is the fault of a society that doesn't raise people to be able to handle it--it's like the lower alcoholism and teen drunk driving rates where booze isn't a big deal. if a person is able to see it for what it is, be it a pleasent sloshy bumping of uglies or a deep and souldful full-body french kiss with someone whom you cherish, adore, and possibly even love, then they don't get twisted and turned around by the issues that chase us; they don't care that they're not sleeping with Tom Cruise or Nicole Kidman; they'll take the time to show someone not to hit kidneys with a leather belt; they'll say, before anything happens, "I'm just using you as meat--no emotional commitment. Are you okay with that?" And if they see sex for what it is and are okay with that, well, that's been some of my flavorite lays. Don't blame it on sex. Sex is just juices. It's the brain that bends us over, and society that shoves it in the uncomfortable place. 030807 ... Dafremen I never blamed it on sex. I blame it on society. We bred this generation, we "raised" them. We allowed them to advance the cause of frivolous, apathetic, mindless pop culture a few steps further, just as we took it a step or two and the previous generation did as well. What about your generation's kids? How far will they stray from human being? How quickly will they demonstrate that we are becoming brute animals instead? 030807 ... dudeinanigloo Something I want but can't have yet. My mom says the same thing about the car... *sigh* 040702 ... u24 a somewhat ironic post. 040702 ... Jess Snap Dude! Though the question is, who do you want it with? 040807 ... pete it doesn't mean nothing, but what exactly it means... i dont know 040807 ... Novice . 040808 ... Lafiel Sex is a way of just letting everything in the world melt away for a while and to feel pleasure in a way that's addicting. That is if the fucking ass guy could ever get you to orgasm without doing it yourself...*sigh* sorry I haven't screwed in 5 months and I am going nuts. 060418 ... grendel as a satyr whenever i wanted it to *mean* anything, i typically found myself being treated like a hunchback or a rapist or a hunchbacked rapist with leprosy and cooties, so now that i've gone back to the pursuit of the kind of meaningess_sex that saw me through my early to mid-20's i feel a lot more free and a lot less insecure self-cenetered? perhaps, but no more so than anything i've been up against. 060418 ... norwegian blue birdmad meaningless_sex (pining for the fjords) 060418 ... lux sex_without_love 080707 ... unhinged pain heartbreak used 080708 ... Lemon_Soda Sex is sex. Love is love. They are NOT mutually exclusive. That isn't aimed at anyone, just what I think. 080708 ... Lemon_Soda ARE mutually exclusive. Sorry about that. Im used to using that turn of phrase the other way around. 080708 ... . i agree with your uncorrected statement, LS 080708 ... Kurama To me personally? It depends. Sex is whatever you want it to be, with whoever you want it to be with. If this time, it's just the physical act, the intercourse and the orgasm, then that's fine. If it's the emotional act, the love and the intimacy that only comes from having sex with the person you love, then that's fine as well. Sex is one of those things without one singular definition; instead having many depending on who's defining it and what they're going through as they're defining it. 080709 ... Lemon_Soda Thats a much better way of looking at it. Thank you. 080730 ... pSyche It means fear. It means exposing myself. It means trusting someone. It means I_think_i_will_be_a_nun 080731 ... unhinged i have also wondered if maybe i should become a nun. i am starting to pile up bad experiences. yeah, maybe if i just got myself to a nunnery, i could send my love like radio waves. 080801 ... . nonconsensual celibacy Goddamn, somebody fuck me, please! 080801 ... hsg be patient 080801 ... unhinged it means getting left behind 080918 ... In_Bloom Sex is comfort Sex is healing Sex is spiritual amplification Sex is a melding of two Sex is letting go the self Sex is power 081109 ... In_Bloom *I'd like to choose Sex as my time of dying 081109 ... unhinged hurting people and getting hurt 081109 ... Lemon_Soda How much thought do we put into who we are going to sleep with BEFORE we sleep with them? "Oh, but they makes me feel..." When that feeling passes, who will they be? Now, consider asking that question BEFORE hand. If you need to know what to look at, consider how they treat themselves, other people, what they've done with the time they've been given, etc 081110 what's it to you? who go blather from