eyedreamism eyedream Untitled Ethan paced in front of me, occasionally pushing a hand over his forehead. “The world is stupid,” he said. I knew he was worried, not just because he couldn’t stop moving, but because Ethan agrees with me that the word stupid does not belong in the English language. “Why don’t you sit?” I suggested gently, and gestured towards the chair beside me. Ethan looked at me uncomprehendingly for a moment, and then finally started nodding, abruptly and vigorously. “Yeah. Yeah, that a good idea. I’ll sit.” He looked at me again, without nodding or pacing, but did not sit. He was upset, but I liked seeing him that way. Completely naked, and with his torment splayed everywhere, he seemed terribly alive. I stood up and walked towards him, stopping when our bodies were so close that only an inch of space separated us. I thought we would touch, but in that second he stilled. We were motionless. It was entirely sensory; I could feel the swell of heat that emanated from his body every time that he breathed, and I could see the sound vibrations rippling through space and time before I actually realized that he was talking. “How long is it?” he asked. I didn’t move, not even to look up at him, and spoke into his chest. “One hour.” “We should probably move now.” Neither of us did. “I was thinking,” he said to the air over my head, “That I should know everything about you before I go.” “Where would you like to start?” I replied to his chest. “What—what do you like about me?” “The nape of your neck.” I could hear him smile. “What is the saddest colour?” “Yellow.” “What is your favourite word?” his voice was becoming slightly more Ethanish. “Exalted. No, iridescent. Or slender…or maybe neanderthal.” He laughed and we both shook. I grinned at his chest, which creased and flexed. “Neanderthal? Why neanderthal?” “Just try saying it.” He paused, and then said “Neanderthal,” as though he were trying it on like clothing. I could hear his skepticism. It clouded me with grey waves. “You can’t say it like that,” I said, “You have to relish it. Neeaaaaanderrrrthal.” “Neaaaannnderthal,” he drawled. “Neannn—” “Neeeeeeeaaaaann—” We both started laughing. This time as we shook my face slid against his chest. We held our position there and I smelled him, the bar-of-soap-and-cleaning-detergent crisp scent that lingered under the soft male smell. I could sense him sniffing at my hair, and my scalp quivered like it was exploding in pinpricks. “Stop that.” “Okay.” He stepped back an inch again. “Is there anything else you’d like to know about me?” He considered. “What’s your least favourite word?” “Pimp. Or sneer.” I said, thoughtful. “Sneeeer.” “Now you’re getting the hang of it.” “I agree with you.” “That you’re getting the hang of it?” “No, that sneer is an ugly word.” “I never said it was an ugly word.” “Didn’t you?” “I can’t remember.” “Me neither.” “How much longer?” I studied the tiny hairs on his skin, and then I blew on them softly. They looked like reeds in a river. “You’re the one facing the clock, Ethan.” “Well, it’s fifteen minutes.” “Not too long.” “Do you ever think that sometimes, the second hand doesn’t want to move so badly that it screams?” he said. I flinched. “Nooo…” It got so quiet that we heard the ticking. “I should probably get dressed now.” “Yep.” There was another break of silence and we both inhaled at the same time, so that our stomachs pressed together. “It probably isn’t responsible for me to make them take me naked, huh?” “Probably not,” I agreed. He sighed. “Did you hear that?” “They’re here.” “They’re here.” he echoed. “Don’t move.” “I don’t think I have been.” “I know. Just don’t move. Let’s just stand like this. Close your eyes. I don’t want you to see.” “All right, Ethan.” “Are your eyes closed?” “They’re closed.” “Do you promise?” Crashing, the door behind us shattered as someone broke through it, and we both cringed. I kept my eyes closed and did not open them, even as unfamiliar arms brushed against me and knocked me off balance. A low, gravelly voice broke through the room. “Should we say anything—she’s just—” “Leave her.” said another voice. Legs moved, there was grunting, Ethan cried out, and the sound of him in pain made me cry out, and then what was left of the door was slammed shut. Footsteps in the hallway faded away. I found my previous spot on the floor and remained standing, eyes closed. “Ethan?” I called out quietly. There was no answer, and in front of my body I sensed no presence. The air was blank, wide, empty. I reached forward, hoping until my throat ached that my fingertips would graze his skin. Instead, my hand stretched into the air. I convulsed, emitted a small animal moan, and stumbled backwards into the chair behind me. I sat there with my hands folded on my knees, trembling. Suddenly I became aware that it was cold in the room. I shivered and drew my legs up, holding myself in a curl. Only then did I open my eyes. I was alone. I sighed, long and laboured. Outside the rain shuddered down the window, and a yellow taxi pulled out onto the street and drove away. 030612 ... eyedream www.googlism.com 030612 ... endless desire i don't understand the googlism and where the beautiful story is from or what happened to ethan. won't someone explain? the story was so beautiful. i don't think i have ever read writing that i enjoyed that much. 030612 ... eyedream wrote the story. All by herself! 030612 ... methinx wants to know "what happend to ethan?" 030612 ... endless desire wants to know also and is impressed! 030612 ... eyedream my english teacher wondered the same thing. I'm working on it. I thought the story was finished, but maybe it isn't. 030613 ... endless desire i think it is an absolutely beautiful/amazing/incredible/lovely story. but the holes in it are driving me nuts. ((maybe it's more mysterious that way)) i wonder if i am the only one who doesn't know where ethan went or if he's coming back or anything such as that. 030613 ... eyedream You know, Desire, if I told you the huge mess in my brain I went through trying to figure out what happened to Ethan, it would ruin the mystique. Simply put, I don't know either, and none of the scenarios I think up seem to work. I'm going to keep trying. The story was never so much about what happened to Ethan--from the start the characters knew about the inevitability of his situation. I just don't get it. 030613 ... Rowbes I like the ending. Art should make you think. People are used to everything being too straight forward in a traditional hollywood ending. The story is perfectly exqusite. Two thumbs up. If I had more thumbs, they would be up too. was here 030614 ... eyedream One thing I don't like is spelling things out for people. Rowbes, you make me feel alone. touches you 030614 ... Rowbes Rowbes doesn't want to hurt anyone. How has Rowbes made you to feel alone? wonders... 030615 ... jane i liked the story very much and i don't think it's missing anything, not even an ending 030615 ... endless desire but why did they take him? that's the thing. i keep trying to invent my own reason but it just doesn't fit and it really is driving me crazy. i think though, that i need to get over it. 030615 ... may I live like you wonderful story. well done. things shouldnt be spelled out. never. 030615 ... birdmad yes, yes, this is quite good. wow. (gives the ebert, roeper and "buddy christ" style thumbs-up) 030620 ... endless desire blathe_of_the_week oh wait, no. blathe_of_the_year. though, i haven't read every blathe. 030620 ... bandersnatch that was wonderful. frankly, i dont care where they took ethan, how he knew when they would take him, or even who "they" are, all that matters is the now, the current moment and the moment that was pertraid was beautiful. 030621 ... karl the weed that was really good. i think that if you added explanation, it would ruin it. 030621 ... endless desire i guess i am the only one in the world who is dying of curiousity (?) 030621 ... screwing for virginity no you arnt, but if you knew what happened it would alwase be disapointing. it is like stephen_king said in an iterview once "the key to a scary moment is to not show them what was behind the door. if you have a 5 foot bug they will say 'at least it wasnt a 20 foot tall bug' and if you put a 10 foot tall bug they will say 'at least it wasnt a 100 foot tall bug.'" and even though i cant stand king (but i do like bachman...odd). even though this isnt a scarry moment, knowing what it is would alwase be a disapointment (do not repeat yourself, do not repeat yourself). 030622 ... oops uh... the 20 is supposed to be a 10 030622 ... User24 is speechless, to be honest. My trademarked "nice." seems to bland. "I like this blathe" Is just weak. somehing like "I agree, this is blathe_of_the_week" is just propelling competitiveness which I disagree with. I was considering just "." but that's like spraying "I woz ere" on the globe theatre. so.. "" 030622 ... eyedream I am amazed. I am amazed. Endless Desire, concurrent with popular demand, I will not reveal the story behind Ethan's capture. But this is not because of popular demand that I do this, but simply because I don't know the answer either and I'm starting to think I never will. 030622 ... Dafremen This truly was an amazing blather. Six thumbs up and a bottle of Scotch Whiskey poured over cornflakes for eyedream! 030622 ... eyedream I'm more of a Tre Limone kind of girl. 030622 ... Jabberwock what would the world be without chocolate? 030622 ... screwing for virginity chocolateless 030623 ... Dafremen dechocklinated 030623 ... eyedream cocoaradicated licks a morsel from her index finger 030624 ... stork daddy there is something pleasant about your writing. i get the feeling even technical manuals written by you would have an different feel. 030624 ... endless desire ooh i read it again. chills and sadness and that empty feeling. it's so beautiful eyedream. it really is. "It clouded me with grey waves." i like that. i wish i could write something like that. stands in awe once more. 030624 ... eyedream =embarrassed 030624 ... ferret not knowing the ending rather made me feel like the "me" in the story (can i call her anna? i associate her personality with an anna) when she had her eyes closed. nice imagery 030721 ... ferret *wonders what he was talking about in his previous blathe 030806 ... misstree Wow. I'm usually pretty blase' about most writing, my own included, and especially short stories... but this was beautifully written without being overelaborate; it was simple and soft and strong... i was/am fascinated... i agree that knowing the details of where ethan went and who took him would be useless, we know what happened in the end, we know what matters... absolutely, positively beautiful, eyedream. *curtsies to the floor, stumbles a bit, and rises solemnly* 030811 ... User24 why -did- you put the googlism.com link on though? 031021 ... User24 according to googlism; eyedreamism is my favourite blathe of all time eyedreamism is incredibly good 031021 ... magicforest is amazed 031022 ... Death of a Rose 'BOOBIES, BOOBIES'......ooops...sorry...you can blame misstree. Don't stop eyedream. 031022 ... realistic optimist ya schnockered me off my feet with that one. powerful, compelling, taut words, miss eyedream. i could feel and sense and smell that blathe; how delicious! 031022 ... icy que hermosa. blather_of_the_year is awed. 031104 ... icy blathe_of_the_year *embarrassed* 031104 ... magicforest I can't believe how people keep finding this and...liking it. I've only met one nonskite who loved eyedreamisms...but she's a blatherskite in soul anyway. 031105 ... sylphide In agreeance with above blatherskite's, well done eyedream. It takes a somehow uniquely beautiful word to keep me intrigued.. I was beautifully moved by your words, in a perfectly imperfect way.. i mean that in the sense that it left me to feel so much in not knowing what happened. However, I'm not wondering so much as to what happened to Ethan, but moreso how it was you came about writing this story ?? Was is sadness? was it desire? 031113 ... Whitechocolatewalrus It's a good thing everything is not this well written, because I would never ever stop reading. It was oh so lovely. 031115 ... magicforest/eyedream Dear young_old_boy_from_Green_Earth, you may like this place, or you may not. I don’t know what your affinity for language is or if it is anywhere near as horrific as my own. But I have many questions to ask you (touché, I know, but I promise you that my questions do not bring me restlessness, but rather some mild elation from every half-truth I fall upon) which I would rather ask without worrying about getting you fired for providing philosophical interest to a girl (who had just spent three hours wandering around Gap/Eddie Bauer/American Eagle as her guy friend hopelessly tried to decide between three identical brown corduroy jackets) rather than selling your merchandise. (But God may strike me down before I get anywhere near one of those freaky lawn gnomes. The last time I was in there, an employee tried to convince me that the facial expressions on the lawn gnomes were friendly, rather than gleefully malevolent, and after a long argument and several words exchanged that shouldn’t have been, we agreed to call it a draw. Preceding this I was in a Sarnia green_earth and humiliated myself in front of yet another worker when I was trying to act cryptic and transcendent and Petrarchian, but that story is not for the telling. But you see, I have a long and deeply-fettered history with green_earth and it’s employees.) Give me a ring at miss_eyedream@hotmail.com if it be thy will, my little sixteen-year-old Celtic queen. likes chance encounters 031117 ... . this is AWFUL 031219 ... reue why? 031219 ... magicforest If I could disagree, Dot, I would. 031219 ... oE This was a-ma-zing! Nothing else to say. I felt the erotic, senual intensity and the promise of what could be between ethan and the "girl" I must have missed this one. *recovers from aesthetic reel, room rocking knees knocking all out passion that must live within your glorious heart*...yeah ya got serious skillz young lady.. 031219 ... magicforest AUGH 031219 ... pSyche This reamains so beautiful... 060415 ... epitome of i Epitome, being lazy, has just read this for the first time and wishes to compliment eyedream on the beautiful descriptiveness. :) 060421 ... see also: eyedreamism_index 060421 ... oren Great reading. 060421 ... the signpost i'm sorry for dragging all this up again, dreamer. 060422 ... . . 061014 ... . again. 130104 what's it to you? who go blather from