awed (_) that my legs don't automatically bend when i let go. i lean forward and have to hold the bar again, but that's all. not crashing to the floor in a heap, like it used to seem i would do if given the chance. more balance than i've ever had, ever. i am so happy. i don't want to know what it means. holy_fucking_fuck, maybe more impossible things can happen. whatever did this to me, it gives me hope. [crying with unfounded joy] 051216 ... phil He danced for the zhombies, and they showed great pity on him. 051216 what's it to you? who go blather from