youhaveagirlfriend yummychuckle Your head was in my lap And I played with your hair As we watched the movie. youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend You left for the bathroom and I laid down… You put my head in your lap and played with my hair As we watched the movie. Youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend your fingers started tracing my ear softly and slowly as we watched the movie. Youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend Youhaveagirlfriend Your hands were rubbing my neck And that spot right below the corner of my jaw bone As we watched the movie. Youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend I laid on my belly and you Began rubbing my back As we watched the movie Youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend your fingers lingered on the skin that was peeking out below my shirt as we watched the movie. Youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend your hand slipped up my shirt centimeters at a time as we watched the movie youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend almost to my bra my skin seemed to stretch on forever as we watched the movie youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend “be right back, you sexy thang” he smirked as I watched the movie youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend He was back and gave me a massage And under the pillow I had propped up, I stroked your thigh As we watched the movie. Youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend Youhaveagirlfriend The movie ended and we went into town In the back of a truck, And you gave me your sweater to wear as you called me honey and sweetie and cutie. Youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend youhaveagirlfriend we got to town and ran into your girlfriend who gave me a hug. Iknewitwasyourboyfriend Iknewitwasyourboyfriend Iknewitwasyourboyfriend I’m sorry. 020302 ... Logan I was not going out with her then, and will not ever go out with that bitch again 020302 ... bijou the pick up line: "i want to fuck you". you have a girl friend. i'm in love with her, she's the sweetest. she is so wonderful. "i want to fuck you." it's not fair though, i love tara too much. "i love her too. i still want to be with her. but i want to fuck you." i can't do this. but i did. and she still hugged me the next time i saw her. funny. 020302 ... continuous ache you have a girlfriend, and i know who you are. i listened to your argument with her on the phone last night. it was so funny listening from that perspective. i could guess what she was saying (because i had said it all before), and all the things that you said i had heard and believed. hell, kevin said most of those things to me when we fought, and i always believed him. it all sounded so sincere, so sensible. "if i wanted to be with her i would, wouldn't i?" but tony, you are with me. here i am in your car while you placate her with these lies, and all i can think about is how gullible i've been. and here i thought i had come so far in my worldly knowledge of men. ha. she believes you don't do drugs or fuck other women, but she's starting to wise up, isn't she? she's asking all these questions about shannon, and now there are questions about me. forgive me. i knew i was the other woman, but i needed this. i needed this because i am heartbroken like you soon will be, and i needed someone to hold me too. it won't be any consolation to you when the time comes, but i think he does care about you to an extent. i heard so much of myself in your end of the conversation. i really hope you stay innocent and pure. i really wish for you a life that i will no longer be able to live. i have been ripped apart and put back together with so much left out. so much innocence, intensity, drive, sweetness, feeling, happiness, love. the parts of me that are lost are gone forever. i don't want them back even if i could have them. but despite the fact that i am a pain factor in your life right now, i wish you peace and i wish you happiness. love is a concept i don't believe in anymore, but if it does exist, i wish you that as well. i am sorry that i will be something to pull at your heart and make you worry. i never thought i'd put myself in this situation, but i opened my eyes to life awhile ago, and i just can't forget all that i've seen. my heart is not as compassionate as it used to be. i am a burned out star. i am nothing good anymore. 020303 ... she Fuck, she's not just a girlfriend. She's your fiance. Why do you have to play with me? You know in a heartbeat we'd drive down to the lake, hop on my boat and do the things we "joke" about. But you're always talking about your fiance. Licorice thongs, threesomes, taking off and leaving everything behind. Do you think you're fooling me? As long as I never meet her, I wont feel bad when you're calling out my name and not hers. 020303 ... blown cherry I read this the other day yummychuckle, and it's stuck in my head. I really like it. I wish I'd told you sooner. Feel good yummychuckle, you deserve to. You've given me a gift and I'm saying a great big thankyou :) 020304 ... yummyC aw thanks so much, that made my day :) it was a wicked bad thing i did tho. not that i did anything too bad. it was just a back rub. But the intent behind all these little things just gives me guilt. so no more being the bitch that some guy cheated with. i dont want to be that girl. plus there are like 4 guys that have things going on with me right now besides him that im trying to figure out. oi. luv. 020304 ... lycanthrope i might...what's it to ya? 020304 ... blown cherry I'm behind you a hundred percent in trying to sort stuff out and not being the other woman. I've kinda been there myself. I've also had to accept that where love is concerned, and attraction, sometimes shit happens. You just have to know that and move on, the guilt will pass. 020305 ... yummychuckle thanks. the guy is seriously not a bad guy. hes super nice, everyone likes him. but because he *attempted* to and maybe *did* (depending on definition--he was walking a fine line) cheat on his girlfriend, my friend Eve thinks hes this awful person and ....I REALLY want to be his friend. He is really cool. just because he fucks up by flirting too much doesn't mean hes a bad person and i shouldnt hang out with him. Its not fair to me. 020305 ... yummychuckle you are going to prom with her tonight but last night we camped at the beach and you insisted... and I couldn't help myself. And now I am the bitch that messed around with sombody elses boyfriend. actually t was a bit more than messing around. oh guilt ridden. why can't I stop living in the now? I need to care about the future. I have no self discipline. 020309 ... misstree *you* have a girlfriend. *i* am the apple you shouldn't pluck. *you* are the one who should be strong. *i* am going to live for myself. because there's no one else to do it for me. 020309 ... CRO .... good to know, but not, at the same time. I'm still worried you know. 020309 ... yummychuckle so now I can't be upset that you called the party I was at, refusing to speak to me and requesting a different friend. still, it hurt. a lot. I don't know whats up, I don't know if you are mad, i don't know how you feel anymore. This is why I don't just assume things and I always refer t someone having feelings for me as, "i think he kinda likes me but he might not anymore". well fine. don't play with me. I wasn't supposed to let you cheat on her. My morals are so weak in the face of lust. I thought we would have fun his spring break. I wished and hoped i would be strong enough not to wantt to/not to do it. and now its ot even a question of that. or at least i think so, because you did not want to talk to me tonight after we talked for hours and hours a couple nights ago about all these lust ridden thoughts we have for eachother. well whatever. 020324 ... yummychuckle ok, justan update: that wasnt him that called the party mentioned last entry.mistaken identity. you have a girlfriend and her name is alison and sunshine and sweet princess darling love. you have a girlfriend and i am just that bitch that wrecks it all. my name is bitch whore cunt slut backstabber. but you call me "mi amore", and "my dark princess" which pisses me off a bit because, well, thats pretty cheesy. but i suppose dark would be right. you have a girlfriend, you still do but now she knows about me and they know about me, everyone knows about me and you and they hate me, because... I am easier to hate. and you are just so fucking loveable. my heart is sore and my arm is bleeding out all my imperfections now. a constant drip. i rush through the hallways at school fighting tears getting to the bathroom stall so nobody will see my face contort or me frantically biting myself scratching myself ANYTHING for the outer pain because inside it feels unbearable, so desolate and lonely. I was listening to sad song number seven and i was looking out through a cheap window encrusted with careless fingerprints. and I saw you. you turned and faced her. she was walking towards you. and you both smiled and i saw your hand wrap around her waist because she's your girlfriend and thats what you do. especially after you fight about that girl that means nothing to you the one you say was an accident to everyone else. but on the phone you say you are falling in love and I'm breaking your heart. but i won't listen the phone wouldnt stop ringing and all i could do was pick up hang up cry. repeat. well, i made you a mix. its a shiny new cd that tells you how i feel, and hopefully it will slice you open like the flesh of my right arm. i'm bringing a razor with me to school tomorrow. i may be needing it. All my other friends are disgusted with me and therefor i am alone. no im not. just me n my razor. he always saves the day. 020402 ... yummychuckle if you werent so popular, i wouldn't be so hated. if alison werent so nice and wonderful this would be no tradgedy. if i hadnt dropepd that ntoe for my mom to find, i wouldnt be threatened with being "sent away" (wherever that is..) and then ignored. if i had just not been me, all of this would be okay. but i have enough decency to blame all of this on me, so alison has someone else to blame. wrong move i think. Saving nimai just so he could beg for me back after he said he hated me. hated me. HATE. and last night he said he loved me. things should never be so black and white. 020402 ... Casey You have a girlfriend, and you two always fight and pretty much hate each other.She's a controling stupid bitch! So just break up already! 020403 ... silentbob jamie i wish i could make it easier on you 020403 ... k1 And she loves you very much. 020409 ... cheryl brown "What would you do if I kissed you right now?" "Why would you ask that?" (sorry, I know that's not my line) Damn you and your high and mighty views on cheating. You wanted to kiss me. You couldn't stand how beautiful I looked sitting there on the steps at 3 in the morning. Can you not see how you telling me that you wanted to kiss me, telling me how I am the only person you've ever loved, telling me how you are still in love with me after so long, is so much worse than a simply meeting of lips would ever have been. 020419 ... Syrope and you "have a right to decide whether a relationship is platonic or not" ...well excuse me, almighty, but i have a right to a lot of things that i would give up if it meant not hurting someone else who at one time meant something to me...but fuck you. fuck me. and fuck any illusions i ever had of you being a decent human being 020823 ... somniac and shes right there and its just so innappropriateand she’s right there and its just so inappropriate I don’t want to be your excuse for breaking up 040905 ... minnesota_chris ahh, but we cowards need an excuse for everything. 040906 ... marled . 040906 what's it to you? who go blather from