unhinged what if i can't let_go ? 040203
june i don't want to
i can't and won't until...

i'm not even sure of that final destination
x how do you know when you should? 040216
no reason when they're long gone. when they're not coming back. 040216
"though it clouds my eyes "tell me who doesn't love
what can never come back?"

(The_Cure "The Blood")

i can never stop"
Staind_And_Souless I'm still trying to let go of you. It's been ten years. And You're still here. Every morning when I wake up. Everytime I look at the scars. 040406
Syrope and nobody holds on when i need them to

our timing is off
how can we dance if our timing is off?
unhinged fuck it


it's never going to be released and i can't erase it. besides the fact, that who gives a flying fuck blah blah blah blah blah....damn

yeah, i was a stupid idiot. sorry. it's not going to make a difference. it's over. done.
beth all right. 040407
megan now.
let go megan.
let it go.
it will come back if it's meant to be.
if you cling to sand, it falls through your fingers.
let it go megan.
let it go.

17 going on 40,000 it feels like sometimes
silentbob why does sand have to be so pretty? 040407
little wonder I should have a long time ago. for good, I mean. 040407
ethereal When I let him go the first time I should have run with it.
Nope instead we ended up back in our own little Fucked up predicament.
And now I'm sitting here, at 10:30 in the morning talking about an ass hole who doesn't even know I exist.

Was I just some fake sort of reality?

It's funny how you can just disappear.
minnesota_chris I think you disappeared a long time ago, ethereal. Don't depend on the boy to give you your worth. 040408
ethereal Thanks. 040408
misstree where would the fun in letting_go when you should be? and by fun i mean soul-rending nights spent howling at the unfairness of life's present circumstances, powerless to fight your own misery. 040408
unhinged nobody lets go when they should
nobody ever jumps ship
never raise their sails when the winds are good
waiting for a moment that's never coming by
nobody lets go when they should
i look around
to the beat of some lost past
what a cast of characters
that mingle with my everyday
the word in town
is that hope's been dead for awhile here
and it shows on faces passing as i make my way
does it bring you down
how could it not man it's always grey
when you doubt half the things you do and everything is safe
in the lost and found
the ones you threw back in
you only fish for sport
the first catch being the reason you're this way
nobody let's go when they should
nobody ever jumps ship
never raise their sails when the winds are good
waiting for amoment that's never coming by
nobody lets go when they should
you feel it's stare when you're all alone
and turn into lonely shadows fading into grey
for the common ground
sometimes you'd be better off kicking sand in your own eyes
when you pat your back that way
nobody lets go when they should....
--- fs
kookaburra i let go before anything happens...
makes life and stock trading difficult
sab and ne'er a truer word
was said
unhinged *sigh*

and only an even more beautiful song for the truth of the lyrics. he's a damn talented man bogged down in one of the biggest black holes on the planet earth. only way he'll get somewhere is if he leaves, and everyone knows once you get sucked into a black hole there's no way out. finishing line in homesick = 'there's no way out'

and i know even when you leave, it doesn't leave you.

the beautiful denoument to a deeply personal album; hidden track. unreleased.

you can't ever really totally let_go until you die. cause it is what has shaped me, who i am right now. and i might let_go of the pain and the drama, but it leaves a lasting imprint. the fact that after all of it, i'm too afraid to care. the residual lasting effects of not letting_go when i should. but if i did let_go when i should, before i am mortally wounded, profoundly affected, the same effect is had in the end. cause i'm letting_go before i have the time to care. either way, i end up not caring. but it's the life i live in the process of holding on and letting_go that makes the two choices different.

i might end up moving back there if the price is right. i already think about how i've changed since then and how different my life will be if i do go back. money will talk even if i end up looking a hypocrite in the end, selling my soul to the devil back to my self_implemented misery. it wouldn't be the same though. i'm closer to knowing when to let go when i should.
dries&hardens it's hard when there's a finish line with onlookers waving
urging you forward with tepid concern
but there is no victory
the tape is already broken
and you can't let the baton go
and admitting defeat means
you were never even in the running
steampunkrock i try, but i keep circling round to the initial letdown and my fist close tighter. will this cycle ever end, i wonder? 080710
caresscoffee I wish it were that easy... what if I really honestly can't let go? it's been a year & a half since he broke my heart.. I still miss him on a regular basis 080712
hsg if u cant let go- the pain becomes ever more great until u do. you cannot outlast what u arent supposed to. 080712
unhinged heroin_doll s leave me empty_handed every time

i should have let_go long before i did
so you don't get it
why i'm picking now to walk_away

and i don't know how to confront you
about what you did
i've found my spirit animal in all this though
such a turtle i am
attack me and i retreat
re_alisma very true. but hopefully the karma of relationships does, with much work, come to resolution, without some future life to worry about, a benefit.

(a drug addict, though, could very well just be some sort of idol to get a person to deal with their own substance issues. and at a Saturn Return, when life becomes too strict on us)
FA113N Goodness, that was prophetic

(Yes, I know, I shouldn't be going over old posts)
Risen Every time I grow up, every time I evolve. Each step I take towards a new me... there she is.

Those old scars are still there on my arms, pale, white, faded, but there. Some fresh scars on my heart, pink and vulnerable. Soon the skin will tighten. Soon it will finish its new walls. Stronger than before.

But no, I never let go when I shoul. I check post secret and my throat tightens. I feel the pain of withdrawal from her more fiercely than from any other drug.

I look at my phone. I contemplate it. I want to. Oh god how I want to. But I can't. I left it because it was best for us both. Knowing her M.O. she's probably changed her number anyway.

But oh god I don't want to have pushed her away. It was right. I know it was right. My mind knows it was the right thing to do. To have left. To have moved myself away from those endless days of waiting, of wishing, of hoping that this time, this time she'd turn up. This time I'd come first.

I never did. I left. And now I should let go.

But nobody lets go when they should.
what's it to you?
who go