innerviews_ephemeral_arcs frAnk i could crumble up this sordid hallmark moment like a piece of mistake ridden notebook paper, and even though it misses the wastebasket when i throw it with frustration, someone else could find it, pick it up out of curiosity, straighten it, read it, be touched, and paste it in a journal of beautiful things. our lives are multi-dimensional. we are everything around us and all things yet unseen. we see it all the time, varying degrees of con-artistry, and no one seems to mind. we stop when we are going where we need to be. we go to places we are not allowed. we break the hearts of the ones we love and we hate ourselves. and when we try to remember who we were in the hours of our temporary glory, where happiness came as sudden as any ueless beauty, we find ourselves losing our final bits and pieces of energy to digestion. yawning becomes unavoidable and then we soon close our eyes to the last sounds of a waking day. sleep is like dying. each night we close our eyes the self we grew to be that day is history, all the collected moments of character achievement are gone. in the morning we are reborn. like a baby, soft and helpless, i don't ask the question why, but i do ask this. should we try to stay awake if we like who we were? or do we sleep to dream of who we can become? 020403 ... -{::EphemeralArcs::}- *bows*, I am humbled and trembling to be asked any question by you frAnk. You truly are a master at observing people, your questions are always aimed and carefully calculated about a persons character, asking a question to them that most often relates to their core being. I can give you no less than my best answers: Death takes on many masks, but also the death beneath those masks can change. From what I've learned from being an adaptionist, everything is nothing and everything and the same time. Every facet of life can change, and does millions of times, and more. Sometimes they paint themselves before you so briefly, they seem to you only a chimera that couldn't hold itself against the will of the world, its fabrication lacking enough truth to cover the truth. Since some very traumatic history in my dark past, I have strived to be an adept at adaptation. Adaptation is the quickness in which one can change with the environment, but also, through the trials in trying to become an adept, I learned that being an Adaptionist also requires the ability to change an environment. At first, you change your own environment to match the external environment, which is less prone to influences by you alone, because external environments have many more influencing factors. When you change your internal environment, you are essentially closing it and reopening it. Then, as you become more 'adept', you gain more influence over the external world. At this point you could change the environment to fit you. But this is a mistake, a mistake made by people everywhere who mold their environments and force them to stay unchanging, using metal and wood and other solid objects to stand rigid against the rigors of time. And then they dedicate their lives to upkeeping this environment. Rebuilding from every disaster, rebuilding after every and any change. Adaptation isn't a Shiva, to destroy and create, in cycles.. adaptation is a form of minimalism.. you save as much as you can, you try to obtain a perfect conversion, a perfect emulation. So in a way, adaptation is changing as little as possible in order to change, but keeping in mind that benefits are also gained from diversity. So you become a seeker of diversity, as such, a seeker of knowledge. People who encase themselves in their own external environments become rigid to change also, and they can no longer adapt at quick rates. It takes large very noticeable forces to make people change large things, in this case their cherished hold from what was, and what's impending, coming. They seek to hold on to one moment, and never let go. Holding on for too long will almost always be a mistake, it is a form of death. Moving water builds more healthy life than does stagnate water. Adaptation's epitome is water. It takes on the form of any container, any surface, absorbs and mixes with almost everything, but in doing so, also takes on the properties of what was absorbed, though diluted. Water is neutral, and in flowing, changing, and moving, builds many of nature's wonders. Another aspect of adaptation is generalization. Taking the lessons of the specific, and making them general, so they can apply to any situation, but also having the ability to apply those generalizations to the exceptions of the specifics. :: You can't learn everything, but you can learn to learn anything. :: As a result of practicing these traits, I've, as a side effect, started to become somewhat of a jack_of_all_trades. My interests keep expanding, and with them, my ability to learn, adapt, and change. To receive the quickest emulation, and later removing all traces of emulation.. making it truly something that belongs to me, that works with my environment. As an example, I started playing piano almost two years ago, within three months, I was playing, though not perfectly, songs that took my Brazilian friend years to be able to learn. Granted, I had background knowledge in music.. but, that's part of what makes a good adaptationist, wide experience, and combining both wisdom and intelligence. Wisdom comes from experience, and is already known when the instance comes to play... and heightens the quickness of intelligence, which is basically a rate of adaptability, how fast you can figure out a situation. And, when i read "the art of war" by sun tsu.. i found myself already knowing most of his teachings, and instantly absorbing almost all the ones that i didn't know beforehand... not as a photograph, but with the heart of the lesson in mind. To completely answer your question: "should we try to stay awake if we like who we were? or do we sleep to dream of who we can become?" [[prelude]] the answer isn't black and white, as some would say, it's grey. But in reality, it comprises all the colors, tones, and grays in the entire world, even the colors and dimensions we can't perceive do to our inferior senses. in adaptation, leave all instances open. even when answers are found, don't close any possibilities, or close them for the shortest amount of time possible. Sleeping is like death, but there are two major types of death: the natural death of life and rebirth, and the unnatural death of absence. Without human interference, almost all death is life death. [[middle answer]] hold on to the traits of the previous manifestation of yourself that you liked, and try and integrate them into the new you that is born. In this way, hopefully with each day you can expand upon the things and traits you like, and become better at integrating them, until you achieve your own universal level of Gaia. Be aware that human perception can be perverted and twisted into almost anything, and use that as your tool. But beware also the danger of that tool, of not becoming an adaptationist, but instead an illusionist. They both share very similar traits, and an adaptationist even often relies on illusions: lies interwoven with truth to conceal truth(every lie and illusion also contains truth, otherwise, it couldn't exist). But in using them, know of the lies within their truth, use them to filter your way up to your desired level. Perception changes can't exist without untruth, don't forget that. If you just know truth and how to use that, you could ultimately become nothing. Only seeing things for what they really are is only advantageous when truth itself changes. And it does, but, without the use of untruth you can't get reactions from truth, or change your wave length, and become stuck in one world where only certain things matter. [[ending]] Sorry this is so long, I hope that hasn't caused it to become impotent, and doesn't discourage you and others to delve into the words. When finding the world, I often can't stop, even for mistakes, and correct them as I travel. And, I hope above all, that you can find this sharing... close to your heart. 020405 what's it to you? who go blather from