i_slept_with_somebody_else jane i'm sorry sorry it hurt you but you've hurt me so much more with your indifference 020707 ... little wishes sometimes its hard to sleep alone 020707 ... scattered fall nothing left but one regret 020707 ... josie I took two hands to embrace you and now i'm left having bitten off more than i can chew. Do you think anyone else knows widdle1? 020707 ... jane i did it again!!! (oops) and now what? do i tell you? do i hide it and wait till i get back from new york? i don't want us both to be miserable the whole time. before i had an excuse: we weren't exclusive. but now? i am left with nothing, naked, to survive on my own, with no shield by my side. i'm going to tell you, but only because i would want you to tell me 020723 ... big daddy kane well, sounds like you're open to possibilities, so, um, this is a little awkward, but um, wanna have sex with me? 020723 ... CurlieQ I miss cuddling 020724 ... phil today 020729 ... jane i gotta stop cheating, man but i would if i could 020803 ... squint goddamn, no offense but i knew you were going to write something like that. i stress the no offense part. I am guilty of such crimes, myself. 020803 ... melissah actually, i never have. my stomach starts to twist with guilt if someone even hits on me. and i didnt even do anything! 020804 ... jusslissen2me I know it's bad and all, and some people just have that inside them to do it. But it isn't cheating unless you get caught. Lol. =) 020804 ... jane my problem is i can catch myself... i've never been one to be ridden by guilt - i mean i'm a semi-kleptomaniac - but man...with him... 020804 ... jusslissen2me I slpet with someone else. You know i was and just would rather let me burn inside. Everytime you'd look at me and tell me that you love me. I burned even more. I am admitting it now. I quit. I am from now on a one-woman man. 020805 ... jane i_want_to_sleep_with_someone_else 020810 ... eddie why do you sleep so much 021011 ... jane i think lack of sleep is the ultimate problem 021012 ... little wishes when you're alone everyone is someone else when you're alone the someone else is no longer Someone Else. 030501 ... MOAI i haven't but you have and hearing about it from you and them isn't any fun. 030501 ... minnesota_chris that is never any fun. 030501 ... thunderbuck ram she was so offended, but I was really oh so tired. 040907 ... megan you told me that it doesn't matter that that's in the past and not a part of us and that it doesn't matter but it still matters to me for some reason i want you to understand why i did it and why it upsets me still and why i want to talk about it/need to talk about it maybe i should just get over it like you said 040907 ... Bespeckled It seems natural until I look at it from the context of what you and I had. And then it just seems strange, but I don't feel bad. I think if I discovered that you had, though, it would tear me up inside. 041215 ... stork daddy you'd forgive me if you knew how good it feels. and the only appropriate response was fuck you. and he knew it and she knew it. 041215 ... hsg "well, did you come?" 080501 ... Ouroboros In my dreams, every night 080502 ... unhinged kiss_your_lover_goodbye and maybe it was part of his intention, he didn't like you. maybe it was just cause he was drunk. but in my head, sleeping with him was the perfect way to rid myself of you. i might be a slut, but i'm not that much of a slut. 080502 ... daxle and that's okay cause you know and you don't own me 080502 ... Ouroboros almost 080701 ... past the last time, i was the someone else. 080701 ... SleepieCloud Is it a problem when you forget who's supposed to be the one and who's supposed to be the someone else? 080701 ... gja Spleepie Cloud - yes. 080702 ... Ouroboros depends- polyamory 080702 ... minnesota_chris any polyamorists wearing Depends can stay away from me. 080702 ... Ouroboros and it was amazing 081106 ... hsg was this your first "someonelse" 081106 ... LoverOfLight S: I don't want to guess at such things. I want clean and I want it all mine. H: Well, you'll never have to worry about those things ever again. You're with me from here on out. But hey now- look what happened. You let me down on your word which was enough. Before I even guessed you'd let me down with your body. Never guessed you'd let me down with your heart. *I slept with somebody else* 081106 ... hsg what does this mean: "But hey now- look what happened. You let me down on your word which was enough. Before I even guessed you'd let me down with your body. Never guessed you'd let me down with your heart." ? 090205 ... In_Bloom It means to believe in someone's word, that their word is enough to hold your trust. To be let down when they share their body is less than when you find out they also shared their heart. At that point, you hold nothing of them but a memory. 090205 ... unhinged in a way i never got a chance to sleep with you yet you still leave a bigger mark on my heart 090205 ... Lover_Of_Light In the dark, he could be you He fucks like you did He curls me to him in sleep as you did But thank gawd he is not you We keep the lights on so I know where I am at all times and so I can learn to trust his face He wants me to not be afraid to look at him At us together Each of us a somebody else putting distance between heartache and torment 090808 ... your mama that's why i have her in the back of my trunk 140326 ... flowerock Something I never want to say. I had to say it once, to my second real boyfriend, it gave me the most horrible feeling I've felt yet in this llife. To have betrayed my word to someone I love and respect, to look into his eyes as I told him what I allowed to happen. I almost vomited. Then he forgave me and held me and still wanted me, great confusion, shock, sickness, gratitude... but i think I felt so horrible about it that I lost respect for myself which caused more hurt and conflict... when you feel you don't deserve someone's love who wants to give it you so freely, well at least in my case, I just let it whither and crumble, I wish I had known better or had the courage to do better. I will never say these words to my lover, he has my soul, my respect, and I respect and love myself as well. I have thought of this recently, since I made a friend who happens to be male who I see at work and like to hang out and talk with, I try to remember that love can be fragile and even if my actions are pure and sincere and I am honest and faithful Completely, the balance of attention and time spent can be just as hurtful. We have to prioritize our time and affections to each other. My love comes first, and is the brightest light in this life for.me. I make sure that anyone else I befriend knows all about him and how much apart of me he is, if they want my friendship they will have to also earn his. My designated_cuddler, lover, snuggler, best friend, heartmate. I worry that he worries. He doesn't have to worry at all. 141118 what's it to you? who go blather from