thinking_of_you *nat* Its funny nowadays how my friends can tell when I'm thinking of you. Which is pretty much all of the time. I sit at the desk in lunchtime doing a brainstorm about adolf hitler, earphone in, partly listening to jo's conversaton on how alisha mad the form room smell of weed, partly listening to 1000 miles, there i pause ... Im thinking of you ... "nat, nat NAT!!!!!" "What the hell do you want, i trying to work incase the papaer and pen didnt give it away!" "no your not, ur thinking about gez" "oh ye...." "blah blah blah" #thinks to self# " oh fuck off jo, id rather be sat here listening to gez than you" lost in thoughts 020920 ... devalis all the time. when you were away for a while it hurt to think of you because all I could think of was how you weren't here. how you're never here, even when you aren't away, how long it's been since I've seen you face to face. and how I can almost gurantee that you're not thinking of me half as much as I'm thinking_of_you. I tried the rubber band treatment. The rubber band was the thinnest I could find because then it drew blood when I snapped it. Welts everywhere. I asked my friends to snap the rubber band for me if I even looked like I was thinking about you, and to act like they didn't know who I was talking about if I mentioned your name. Quitting cold turkey. Addy scolded me. She said I should be ashamed for trying to forget about you, that I'm lucky to have someone to try to forget about. The next time I snapped it, the rubber band broke. She said it was a sign. You returned that night and told me exactly how much you'd missed me. I couldn't bare to tell you just how much I'd missed you. Here I am thinking_of_you constantly 020921 ... IKC 56-80 lying all alone and restless sleepless, unable to focus a_perfect_circle this is driving me nuts, i'm suddenly thinking about one of my best friends in a way that's a little to the left of what you might call "friendly" two problems staring me dead in the eye here, first one is the fact that she's already got a boyfriend, second how do i tell someone i've known since we were kids that everytime she looks at me or touches me lately, even just to punch me on the shoulder the way we've done to each other for ages gets me feeling all weird and tingly from my neck to my knees damn somebody, anybody, does life stop being so weird and awkward once i get past being 17? or is what my brother told me true... that this is just the start of the weirdness and it's pretty much all downhill from here 020922 ... CJ i once got a letter that had a cool pic of a fairy in it with the words under it saying "thinking of you..." 020922 ... MollyCule IKC - Life gets about 6000 times easier once high school is over. As for being older than 17, this I cannot comment on, as in my head I am still 15 years old most days. 020923 ... silentbob i want it to be the weekend again 020930 ... werewolf i think past seventeen is just when there starts to be too much history to even keep track of or warn other people about. it's when most people stop trying. 020930 ... Piso Mojado i fall asleep beautiful 031015 ... Piso Mojado i fall asleep beautiful 031015 ... Perplexlypuzzled When I think of you, I see you're bright face, smiling and shining at me and I can't help but smile back. I can hear your words, begging me to come back and it makes me want to cry. I miss you like mad and when I think of you, I am home, no matter where I am. My little brother. When I think of you, I sigh deeply and I wonder where you are and if you are ok. I wonder if your sicknesses are going away or whether I'll get to see you again. No matter what though, when I think of you, I think of what you used to be. The strong, wonderful person I could never forget. My father. When I think of you, I miss you like crazy. My best friend. I think of our shopping days and our many fights. I love you and I wish you were here. My mom. When I think of you, I wonder what girl is oogling at you now. I wonder if you're alright and if you're even still in school. You always gave me something to look forward to, because even though you failed so many times, you were such a good person through it all. My older brother. When I think of you, I wonder how your love life is going. Who you got in the sack tonight and how badly your mom will yell at you in the morning. I think about you on the phone and laugh and giggle at the thought of you yelling at your newest crush. My best friend. When I think about you, I cant stop smiling. You make me want to run through the streets, telling people how much in love I am. You make me believe that fate is real and that men aren't really all that bad. You make me love you more each day. My wonderful boyfriend. When I think about you, I want to go home. I want to see your faces and I want to hug you forever and never let go. I want to be with you and tell you everything I know. I want you to share with me and help me through whatever problems I might have. When I think of you, my problems seem to melt away. When I think of you, I cry. My family. When I think of you, I know where I belong. Texas. =) 031015 ... pipedream ooh, that was vairy preetyy, perpexly..are you new? haven't seen your stuff before, but that was vunderful :) 031015 ... Perplexlypuzzled Thank you.. yes, I am sort of new. I've posted a lot up, though, just because I like writing. :) 031016 ... celestias shadow it bothers me in a vague way that the song is about masturbation, and yet doesn't seem like it. Even if you know the lyrics and listen, and you think "maynard, you dirty little man!" (which you of course don't, because maynard is god), it's still a brilliant song. And it still feels like such a clean song. It's odd. 040102 what's it to you? who go blather from