i_can't_live_on_pills girl_jane Why is it that every time I have a bad day, my mother thinks I should go to the doctor... YES-I've had a history of depression. YES-I've been on medication before. YES-I feel like shit now...but it's just a bad week... I can't run back to pills when I have a bad day... I have to learn how to make through on my own. Nobody's going to hold my fucking hand my entire life. I swear my mother's trying to force me to a drug addiction... 030428 ... girl_jane However-I should get that refill on my ulcer medication... 030428 ... trixie i can live on no pills but is that really living at all? 030428 ... sixteen my mom was the exact opposite for a long time. I wanted to give antidepressants a try after what seemed like a zillion years of trying everything else... and so finally my mom lets me try zoloft, and our relationship has improved--but everytime I'm feeling sort of pissy or not the prettiest ray of sunshine, she says, "are you taking your medication!?" as if its magical and takes care of everything in my life. UGH Yeah I'm taking my goddamn medication, but you can shove it up your ass if you think it makes me a perfect happy girl all the time. 030428 ... trixie one pill makes make you larger... and one pill makes you small and the ones that mother gives you don't do anything at all ...go_ask_alice... when she's ten feet tall and if you go chasing rabbits and you know you're going to fall ...tell 'em a hooka smoking caterpillar has...given you the cord...call... alice when she was just small when men on the chess board get up and tell you where to go... and you just had some kind of mushroom and your mind is moving low... go ask alice i think she'll know when logic and p r o p o r t i o n have f a l l e n sloppy dead and the white knight is talking sdrawkcab and the red queen's off with your head... remember what the dormouse said feed your head feed your head 030429 ... ventricle i have been all kinds of high, but i've never been deafeningly high 030429 ... artery i have 030429 ... unhinged i have tried to live on pills. i've seen people around me try. when the doctor tried to put me on zoloft, i gave it right back. give me pills, tell me i need to see a counselor; the pills don't make the problem go away and the counselor might as well be automated. that's what friends are for, real friends anyways. does the fact that i want to help myself or find help from a human being that truly cares and isn't paid or educated to care make me crazy? 'you don't need pills; you just need a little love' sometimes real_love is hard to find, but he was right. all i needed was a little love. i feel so much more alive now. 030429 ... and somehow it*s become unmentionable I've lived my life in the valleys I've lived my life on the hills I've lived my life on alcohol I've lived my life on pills (new_order) 030429 ... x when you depend on your love for happiness, it just becomes a whole new sickness. 030430 ... *silent screams but I can't take the pain that eats away at my insides every second of the day. I think I'd rather have the pain in my stomach that comes from taking too many at once, rather than the pain that won't release me until I'm buried alive. 030430 ... /anon Pills paxil zoloft prazac ritaline concerta... I am to lazy to rebel against anything so I just take my prescription one at night one in the morning on white one pink paxil and concerta. I just got more paxil too. I can live on them they don't have any noticeable effects so who cares? if it makes my mom and dad think im ok then so be it! I wish they were magic though that would be cool maybe I could fly and be completely happy 030430 ... reasons_to_be_cheerful_pt2 Haldol Valium Lithium Navane Cogentin Tri Cyclics "I" am on "pills" not "on purpose".. AND I have been on and off 16 years.. And,I'm meticulous about my health, (that's on purpose..) My Mother had manic depression.I'm not sure what other family. Don't think you're some kind of "doper" or "drug-fiend" and you have to run to "NA" because you suffer depression! I tried that once, and "NA" called my Dr. and they asked me to go home..:) We've heard stories of some going off their's and,well..you know the rest.. Or,maybe you don't.That's why I'm writing this. Lately there's a catchphrase in PsychMed communities "legal"-drugs..re medications.. This is really important. I think,in my own life I've, to a degree,lived out much of some of Winonya Rider's film repetoire (again, not "on -purpose") "young girls run a-muck".. Or,what she calls it.. AlSo Do you have ANY idea how MANY writers artists as well as "famous people" suffer ..or have these kinds of conditions? Alot.. Cosmic trade-off for "no free lunch".. Who knows.. Love.. I understand where you're coming from.. Your Mothers mean well.. If you think you can do well with less medication or none,great.But,please,talk to your Dr. And also getting off of it cold can be rather unpleasant and dangerous too. Not advised.. I've done the "less medicine route" and the "too much" .."none" Check out this link http://www.nami.org/helpline/peoplew.htm No one wants these conditions "Mental Illness" They're only "now" starting to come out of the dark about it.. It's not fun..And its not "romantic" Remember Winonya wakes up..and it's all a staged screen set.She gets paid and goes shop lifting.I thank God there is medication for my Mom. And me too. If you told me this at 17 I would've argued you to death, or a swift upper cut. For many this is a lifetime battle and it's half won,when you face it. Eventually, it's own mixed blessing:) http://www.nami.org/helpline/peoplew.htm *To prove the irony of this all and just about "how people can be" I've got to share this under a pseudo-name of my pseudo-name here.. Very.. in the dark. And there is no shame.. But, we all know "how people can be" Don't forget about God Without Him, don't know where I'd be today..There's a reason they discuss Higher Power never alone God Bless 030501 ... niska vitamins 030501 what's it to you? who go blather from