notebook_of_heartbreak again_unnoticed_romeo i write therefore i am, yet if i didn't write and i sat around for the rest of my life thinking i'm so cool, would i truly exist without wasting to much space 010518 ... silentbob ive got lots and lots of 70 page wide ruled notebooks full of poetry about pain heartbreak and regret. 010518 ... birdmad i think somewhere along the line we've all had one, the edges tattered, the blue lines blurred and the white paper stained from spilled drinks and spilled tears sometimes we live only as the notes in the margins 010518 ... Glory Box My heart never actually breaks, it just gets all bent out of shape, like cardboard, like discard. 010521 ... Casey Sometimes I'm not even sure if I have a heart to break. 010609 ... birdmad some sketches some spells a few attempts at overwrought song lyrics an abortive attempt at a short story and a note she left me written in in the same set of symbols as the spells for me to translate later i found it while i was cleaning today i wanted to throw_it_away but i couldn't do it 010610 ... *Ziima* Mine is green. It's an omni-notebook. I have had it for over 4 years...and written within the pages is deep felt emotion. Most of which are pain, heartache, and forlorn thoughts...Only one person has been allowed to read it. Big mistake. I broke up with him. I dont know why I felt he was worthy of reading it. Let alone touching it. And now, he knows everything. Damn. Note to everyone out there. If you have secret writings, and you dont want people readig them, dont give in to temptation or begging. Dont. You'll only feel stupid afterwards. 010626 ... Aimee I have one.... mostly filled with morbid comments about how people wouldn't give a shit if I fell off the face of the earth... sometimes i think it's true... somedays I actually think that notebook makes sense.. it does 010729 ... mulder all notebooks make sense... to the soul who created them. for a notebook with nothing inside is an empty story begging to be told. it only begins to live when it is filled with life and it's experiences. 010729 ... Photophobe I go through a new one each week or two, but when I look back at them, I only ever find 2 or 3 pages that are even worth keeping. I still keep them though. 010729 ... blown cherry I've got one. I've had many. I even started doing it on the computer when I got too lazy to write with a pen. I find tattered sheets among my lecture notes. SOmetimes I don't even write names, as though it were all just an abstract and not really my heart in pieces, and I have to try and think back real hard to figure out who broke my heart or made it whole that time round. I seem to write less now, however I blather more. Sometimes when everything is overflowing out of my head and the thoughts are too much for me to bear without losing my sanity altogether I just have to get them out, and sometimes the only writing utensil I have is my phone. So there sits in my outbox stange little pained msgs from myself, until he fills up my inbox again and my pain is relieved, for a little while at least, and that darned envelope starts flashing "no more room for messages" and I have to erase my pain to let a little more pleasure in, until it all goes to hell again. Maybe I'll be able to publish them one day and make a million, and be committed the next day. 020217 ... Aaron i had one.. it got lost after my short stay in the hospital's mental ward.. i asked them for a notebook and a pen.. they gave it to me.. but when i got home i noticed that my old notbook was nowhere to be found.. it was just a plain old black and white composition book.. but so much was in it.. and now here i am with the "new" composition.. pages blank and cold.. nothing to write.. lots of room.. but nothing to say. 020316 ... kerry i have one. i've had 15 besides it. all of them collaged and filled and smeared and hated and loved all at the same time while they sit in a stack in my bedroom and collect furry mounds of dust. poems, lyrics, chapters of books i've tried to write but never had the motivation to finish, pictures i've drawn of people I hate. 020316 ... Syrope ive had a few...i always eventually type my thoughts into the computer and de-name and de-date them, toss them into my AIM info along with lyrics to my latest fave song. people are like where'd you get that quote? im like i dont remember. lol i dont ever keep the paper versions cuz my mom goes thru my stuff, and if she found some of that stuff...oooh i'd be dead 020316 ... distorted tendencies If only you could read me like a book. 020317 ... iNsEcUrE_GoTh_GiRl i have one it's my second one some of the shit i write is just downright mundane some of it is crazy some of it is really deep some is suicidal some is spells some is sad some is conflicts some is regrets most is about heartbreak and love the rest is about inner_deadness i think i will have to burn them when i have finished them. years of my life, carefully documented and destroyed, because i cant risk others reading them some things people just arent meant to know. 040508 ... pSyche i keep on ripping the pages out... i don't know why it hurts so much to look at everything everything i had everything i lost And yet, when I go back to writing in this pitiful book of notes i am regretting that i threw away those memories 050322 what's it to you? who go blather from