worthless lizard the currency of my love has been devalued. the market is crashing over my head; it would be better if the sky was falling. if the sky fell on me, i would be sent hurtling into oblivion. as it is, i feel her disappointment in me, i feel her sadness over my betrayal, and i feel his anger towards me. they all strike me, shrapnel, and this wreckage will suffocate me. 010116 ... carey my thoughts are 010205 ... Laura Always I’ve tried to capture a little piece of beauty I’ve seen in my life and try to put it on a piece of paper. Whether by writing, painting, sketching, using any type of medium, I’ve never been able to do it. I used to think myself worthless with no talent because I couldn’t do something so many people could. It took a while but until this instant I never realized that if everyone could do what I felt I needed to do, then being able to write or draw wouldn’t be the special thing that it is. So many things happen when you are my age, that you don’t have a bad day for one reason. A bad day is a bad day for so many reasons jumbled together that you forget how to focus. And simple pep talks with people saying, “ It’ll get better” or “It’s not as bad as it seems” makes you think you are all alone in problems. God knows, I shouldn’t be the one talking like this, sometimes I still think I am alone, but I’m not. Neither are you. 010327 ... weird creepy bird "i wish i was special" 010328 ... Chrity go to: i_have_words 010408 ... Denna Valuable, new, innocent, free. Everything I used to be. Worthless, broken, hurting, scarred. Beginning beauty, forever marred. 010415 ... Casey my life and my ability to make others happy 010415 ... flame of sin ~Dark And Filthy A Shadow In Need And 2 Black Holes That Tend To Bleed No One Understands It's Empty Depth Until It's Touched By The Hand Of Death~ 010604 ... bethany absolutely positively pessimisticly this is how you make me feel no doubt can't spell can't clean can't keep a clean mouth the conversationused to be revoled around me and in the most unnarcissistic unselfcentered way i'd like to tell you that i'm being pushed away from the conversation worthless to even talk to about around why dont they see all that is the wonder of me? ::whine:: 020421 ... blown cherry so fucking.... is how I feel. Can't pass uni, can't make myself do work, can't make myself finish a song, can't make myself do anything that might prove I am worth something. Don't even have anyone who loves me anymore. At least not anyone who actually knows who I am now. In love with a memory doesn't count. I'm not worth the air I'm breathing. 020526 ... blown cherry Hey! Someone needs me :) I am required to give a wake up call. Maybe I'm not totally worthless then. At least I still function as an alarm clock. I'm even digital! 020526 ... starved i knew it was true when some of them implied that the love i felt for them was something i needed to apologize for it was just more wood for this fire i've been consigned to my_pretty_private_hell 020526 ... endless desire is a quality i both completely understand and cannot fathom simultaneously first, i relate to feeling worthless. without value. meaning. purpose. it consumes me quite often, with hatred as a core. shelled with an unbreakable shield but i think that even if one could penetrate it i wouldnt have the stregnth. how devious it is. masked in so many other forms. but then, in the same sense worthlessness is a ridiculous concept one cannot say that absolutely no one cares for them one cannot claim that they have never made an impact on a single life there must be some median where while others care for them, they care nothing of themselves. i feel most sorry for those who care for them. how hard it must be to persistently care for someone who believes you should not and while, i can apologize now for always wishing you not to care an apology is only worth something if there is also change involved. and try as i might, i cannot change. 030521 ... nick maybe we need to grow up maybe anything we do now would be worthless maybe worse maybe not 031108 ... oldephebe Question ed, is it that you cannot change or that you refuse to endure the arduous jouney/transformation that requires that change..and would such change represent such an antigen/antithesis to your persona that it would constitute eschewing everything that identifies you to yourself and the world as distinctly you..would that change represent an abdication of personhood..in effect obliterating the person you identify as yourself..the source of your sovreignity? is the percieved exchange of personhood and value-system that this proposed outward/internal ascription/behavior state a net loss of power in the relationship dynamic? just curious..don't answer if i'm treading into the shallows of the inviolate and personal.. later... 031108 ... pete eyes and a miracle un folding beneath the closed closeted away slits of new misery, yet i am not sad 040911 ... love & hate is how i feel................ 040911 ... .nom worthmore 050125 ... Adriane destined to leave with far less than I was given (pathos is tragic) a machine, processing resources with no output only pollution 050620 ... highanddry how_she_makes_me_feel 050715 ... one of many Money is worthless. You all know this. It represents the worth of what we trade for it but has no worth in itself. 071202 what's it to you? who go blather from