someone_please_listen_to_me ivyducktwilightseto I... I just don't know what to think anymore. A few months ago, after a long, bitter marriage my parents finally broke it off. Dad moved out to a house he had recently bought (we all saw this coming.) I soon slipped into my usual depressed state, though it was a little worse this time (as I'm sure you know why.) I eventually dealt with these feelings and problems, or so I thought. With a little help from my best friend I was able to stabalize myself. My life continued on. The divorce details really hadn't been very sticky. My brother Matt and I still lived with Mom and we visited Dad every now and then. In the past few days, Matt has become increasingly agitated with all of Mom's demands of him. He kept on talking about how much he wanted to move in with Dad. I of course didn't think he was serious, no one ever really does anything in this family (why do you think it took so long for Mom and Dad to split?) so I wasn't worried. Surprise, surprise, he wasn't really joking. Mom and Matt got in a big fight with it ending in, "I can't wait until you two are gone and out of here!" "Really? Why don't I just move in with Dad?" "Fine! When?!" "Tomorrow!" And the next day (today, or yesterday depending on how you look at it) Matt gathered up all his things and left. Mom just thought he was going out to hang out with his friends, she never took him seriously either. So later he came to pick me up as we had already bought tickets for the midnight showing of Spiderman 2. I asked him if he had told Mom what we were doing and he said yeah. (Somehow the internet got left running and I came home tonight to find two messages from her on our online answering machine asking what we were doing. Yay.) The movie was incredible, and it really lifted my spirits, seeing as how godawfully shitty I was feeling. I was hanging out with a bunch of my friends and Matt after the moving and talking about the "total awesomeness" we had just seen when Matt starts talking to one of our friends (Kendall) about how he just moved out today. After he walked away the following conversation ensued... "So, are you going to move in with your Dad too?" she asks. "Well, I guess not. Mom can't really be left all alone can she?" "Ah, that's so sad, you're going to have a broken home." she replied in a not-so-sad voice. "Yeah, thanks Kendall." And for the first time ever, I didn't want to talk to Kendall. I just walked away and shortly after Matt and I went home. Or, he dropped me off and he went home. I had yet to consider just how much this will suck. My life will no longer be the same at all. I can no longer be the same person. I no longer have my best friend to lean on either. She recently destroyed our friendship, mostly because for some reason she thought I "liked" her. Goddamn stupid high school shit. So, what am I to do now? Who do I turn to? I guess now I'm just another depressed teen with a fucked up family. I always loved clichés. If you actually read through all this, I thank you. Maybe I just wanted someone to listen to me. 040630 ... puredream I never pass up the opportunity to read and listen to what you have to say. I always died last year. Your words are true. But I promise you. Yes I promise you. Tomorrow. Maybe not the day after today, or year after today, but tomorrow. Some day. You will be fine. You will smile in the sun and think it's beautiful. You will breathe. And you will cry. You will be refreshed. Anew. I'm cheering for you. And whatever it stands to you. I love you. 040630 ... seventeen I read through it and thought about it. and I don't really know what to say, I don't feel that I have anything helpful to say. but I listened, and I hope that means something. all i can really think of is that my parents divorced, i moved to hawaii (from maryland) with my mom...and for five years I tried (begged) to move back to my Dad's house. dad didn't want me (teenage girls scare him) and my mom wouldn't let me leave....aside from a few times when she wanted me to go, and then talked to dad and he didn't want me....man, i've never thought about it like this, but i guess neither of them wanted me. hm. well anyway, i think the point of my story...which i should just skip to already... is that if I hadn't gone through my parents divorce, I wouldn't have become so independent. I would be an entirely different person if my parents hadn't divorced...and I like who I am now, so... in the long run, it will make you a stronger person. and that has nothing to do with right now. and again, I fail at being comforting. anyway, I listened. 040630 ... Borealis take it from someone who might know something.. years from now.. regardless of where you find yourself, who you find yourself with, or what you find yourself without.. what you see now, will shape you in ways that you will never wish to reverse. ... it may feel like aboslute shit..if it doesn't..I envy you. but regardless of the outcome..there will be something underlying that makes this particular experience worth something to you. 040630 what's it to you? who go blather from