she_said psychobabe she said nothing was happening. She said it was all a big misunderstanding and that what i was seeing was but a lie to myself. Heh what typical hypocritical bullshit...What i saw was real, its not like she can cover up the mistake she made to hurt me she said we were friends until the day we died..she also said things between us were kool. What a lie what a goddamn lie. Things werent kool, i knew from the beginning that our friendship was going to go to hell after she met him! such a lie.. She said he was but a one time thing. She ment to hurt me wether or not she wants to admit it..the strange part is no one really knows her, i was a good friend to her and knew her..but she threw it all away.. She said our doubts will go till the river ends, the times will go with the clocks..makes no sence but it did to me. From the side of my view i saw it as a great thing to start. Our friendship withered away more and more after each fight came across. Damn she was vicious. She knew exactly what to say to me to hurt me and it always worked..what a friend huh 011007 ... daydream believer i care, she said. don't lie to me. 011008 ... nix0r "i won't forget you =)" "=) how could i forget?" "bye...love you lots =)" that's pretty much the last i ever heard from her. 011008 ... yummychuckle "i wouldn't call you a slut, I'd just call you easy" shortly after she said "i promise I will never judge you" 011008 ... Grievance She said I was perfect for her. As if. She never even loved me, she just.... loved the idea of me. And it rang sweet within her confused head, buzzing. She knew so much, and threw it all away, to play. To say she was one of them, to feel she was one. She said she was an artist. She was talented. She rode, and road, the aesthetic waves. And gave her soul to keep them. Ruled by desire she was. Emotia can either control or guide. It controlled her more than it guided her. I wish it wasn't that way. I did love her. We were like she said. She was like she said. But, I wasn't like what she said. And then, nothing was true of what she said anymore. And the attachments dwindled to out fate: Death of knowing. (each other) Excommunication, with the one you loved, tears you. Or is that tears? 011009 ... nemo she said she'd take me anywhere she'd take me anywhere as long as she stays with me she said she'd take me anywhere she'd take me anywhere as long as i stay clean kiss kiss molly's lips 011118 ... rip i love you but it just didnt work out 011118 ... the cramps Ooh! EEE! AH! AH! 011119 ... Mahayana [she said] i can be anything with you just as you can be anything with me [i smiled] 020306 ... impact she said to be myself to bad i dont know who that is 020420 ... i listened "i dont have any excess gas" excess is a word it means extra 020820 ... gumby we talked for hours last night. sexuality, love, everything. it was an excellent conversation. it made me realize that i love her even more than i though i did, and that was a lot. this could last.... 020821 ... silentbob when did you write this? i_said quite a while ago. 020821 ... stork daddy real cool things. it's not my job to tell you them though. 040221 ... Piso Mojado i think you are so beautiful and the more i get to know you and the more you share the more beautiful you are to me awwwww 060115 ... Piso Mojado you dont have to worry about us liking you we already do (and gave me a hug) 060115 ... hasil adkins you shoulda seen what i had in the bed with me 060115 ... Ouroboros have you been to africa? you walk like africa 061123 ... collective soul when wisdom comes, everything else fades 061123 ... god ooo eee ahh ahh 061123 ... unhinged 'i know' when i said 'i'm in love with you' i don't say things like that anymore 061123 ... Emptyness Alive ...i love you ...i care ...i miss you when your gone ...goodbye 061124 ... sab i thought this was supposed to be beautiful i said i thought this would get easier or at least lesser, somehow i said i think im wallowing i said i think i'll stop 070429 ... poet nothing 070429 ... mahayana "you talk too much" and hushed tears welled up into my eyes clenching fists apprehended my heart i could only think to myself in a yielding whisper [but i haven't even shared all of who i am] and she said to me, "you talk too much & you never fucking shut-up" with such rage and anger another lonely whisper fell upon me [how ironic - i can never get enough of your words, thoughts, and emotions] and her words sting like open wounds bathing in salty tears. growing up i never had anyone to talk to we moved so much - life was always chaotic ... a struggle just to survive. i kept to myself. when you're invisible you're less of a physical target. and when we found each other my entirety ascended with joy for i had finally found someone to grow close to. to talk to. a chance to finally be seen. and now i can't breathe but that's ok because... i talk too much anyhow 070502 ... unhinged 'don't scrunch your nose up at me like that. i was just trying to help you.' and i felt the scowl on my face melt away into a laugh. i tried to argue with her but she forced me to drop it with a clank of our beers. sometimes i have to stop myself from looking at her. she might figure out how i really feel. 081203 what's it to you? who go blather from