is_blather_cheating :_) would like some advice. i have been doing some sexually-suggestive flirting with a blather member. i have a very serious boyfriend but i just like to have a little fun. i would like to marry him but i don't see it happening in the near future. but i am hopelessly in love with him. but i love to flirt. i don't flirt with guys in real life because i don't feel right about it. but on certain chatrooms i have done it and don't feel guilty. so is blather cheating if you don't tell your significant other? 040201 ... drew carey its only cheating if you two agreed that your relationship is not open 040201 ... Toxic_Kisses Ok, lets put it this way, what if you and ur guys rolls were reversed? If he were suggestively flirting w/ other females the way you are w/ guys in chat and who ever here in blather how would you feel about it? Would you care? If you wouldn’t care then no it's not cheating, but if it would bother you even just a lil then in MHO then it is cheating. Granted I don't think you even need MHO or for that matter to even be asking this question bc you've already answered it on your own by feeling guilty for flirting, thus your own guilt answers your question that yes you are cheating 040201 ... PS if you enjoy flirting so much then flirt w/ your BF more after all just bc you enjoy sex doesnt mean you have sex w/ every one, or for that matter cybersex every one, right? 040201 ... TK you know it just acured to me and I could be absolutely compleatly and tottaly wrong about this but may your flirting w/ other ppl be simply seaking out attention and aprovle from others that your not getting from ur bf, the other ppl you flirt w/ make you feel wanted, desirabull, sexy and apresheated, witch is something that your BF isent makeing you feel right now so you seek out that feeling from other ppl bc ur BFs not provideing your w/ that feeling. Like I said I could be wrong but just in case I'm not I felt it needed to be said. 040201 ... :_) TK hit it right on the nose. but i have no desire to break up with him. i might be afraid that if marry him than i will miss out on experiencing new things. i don't want to date anyone else. i will not date anyone else. i want to experience something new before i marry him. please advise me TK 040201 ... :_) and i should have also said. not only would i not date anyone else. i would also not SLEEP with anyone else. blather seems to safe and i know that i would not seek out anyone in real life. 040201 ... :_) still looking for responses this evening as this is falling to the bottom of the list. i thinking it over i believe that what matters is that i know blather isn't real. and that i have no desire to meet any man here because they could be a crazed lunatic. and HONESTLY i have no desire to cheat. blather doesn't reflect any hidden desires to cheat in the real world. my bf is a bit of a jealous type. but if he did the same thing i would be jealous but i'd get over it. especially if i knew it was just for fun. as long as his personality didn't change in a negative way towards our relationship. and i don't believe the same would happen to me. maybe i have answered my own question. but i still feel painfully guilty..... 040201 ... :_) i think i got a taste of my own medicine. to test my jealously threshold. so my bf said that a pair of girl's thong underwear ended up in his laundry pile. and he SWEARS that there was a redhead girl checking him out and that she MUST have thrown in his dryer on purpose. and now he is bragging about this redhead wanting him. normally i'd be jealous, but i'm not. until the ring is on my finger it is acceptable for both us to acknowlege that we are technically single and can behave accordingly. but i really want to marry him and I will be faithful.... 040201 ... hyena yeah, that's a bag o' bullshit. cheating is intent. cheating is giving the emotions that you have committed to giving to one person, to another. flirting is pursuing someone else in a romantic and/or sexual manner, the two things which monogamy ascribes to *just one person*. and there's a big difference between some redhead giving your boy the hairy eyeball (involves no emotional investment on his part) and you trying to initiate an online sexual encounter (which is investment with intent). and, in my oh so fucking humble opinoin, it's pointless, annoying, and out of place. but do as you will. 040202 ... :_) i know it's annoying. unfortunately i can get away with murder here. but realy i hate to annoy such pleasant people. maybe i'm confused. i don't know what i want from my current relationship. it's all too obvious that i've got problems. blather is not an appropriate place to figure that out. and i am sorry if this has been quite an obnoxious display of hormones. 040208 ... hy i think most of blather is an obnoxious display of hormones. enough other stuff to keep me coming back. do as you will. 040208 ... literalist blather is fucking around with Lycos, Dogpile and occasionally with AltaVista but still wants Google to think that it cares 040208 ... literalist the fact of the matter is that in spite of all this, blather never really stopped being hung up on Yahoo and uses this against the others when they get too close 040208 ... jenny enny dots a woman in a microsoft sweater went internet exploring. she met a handsome stranger who took her on a netscape. shhh......don't tell anyone. 040208 ... :_) oops and don't tell anyone one that :_) is jenny enny dots. well now the whole world knows anyway. just try to forget i told you. 040208 ... :_) enny dots ... PS said " if you enjoy flirting so much then flirt w/ your BF more " ************************************** yes, i've tryed that and it's quite nice. and so i've got a strange little fetish for being turned on by men i can't have. i just think about that and it makes me want to have sex with the man i can. 040215 ... Chris aka you seem like my ex. 061101 what's it to you? who go blather from