there's_nothing_funnier_than Aimee I can't really say I've avoided this topic, but in a way I have. I suppose I'm just trying to prepare you, cause I think this could end up being the most offensive thing I've said yet, but Jesus is it funny. I've been thinking a lot lately about the people I've known, and cared about in my life. There are a lot of them, but only one person ever taught me the principle that I consider my mantra today. He didn't just flat out tell me it, I learned it through watching him. Observing one might say, and to be honest, I don't even think what I learned was entirely correct, but all I know, is that there is NOTHING funnier, I repeat, NOTHING FUNNIER than a cripple with a dream. Now I know most people will either be pissing themselves out of the crass nature of the statement, or be repulsed with anger due to the aforesaid crass nature of the statement. But here me out. Think about it. A cripple with the dream of being a rock star. LMAO holy shit. Can you actually see him hobbling with his "Jimmy-sticks" or wheeling in his chair on to a stage where he "bares his soul to the crowd" c'mon, we all know why the crowd's there. It's the same effect the bearded lady has at the circus. No one actually cares about his "art" it's like Timmy on South Park... they just think it's fucking hilarious that a cripple is up there. Now not all people who can't walk are cripples.... some are just handicapped, and that's cool... the cripples are the people I'm talking about. The ones who have to be waited on hand and foot, and the only way they'll ever leave home is if someone ever bothers to marry them... and they'll just be waited on by that spouse. Kinda sucks doesn't it... but let me give you another example.... Imagine a cripple (let's say he has CP and Epilepsy) who wants to become.... a professional baseball player... Keep the Jimmy-sticks, add a helmet, and a baseball bat with a shoulder strap... there is no way, you can tell me that that is not funny. I think the helmet just puts it over the top. What's his batting average gonna be? .350??? please... he'll be lucky if it's .090 Now keep the same cripple, lets say he gets on base, via a walk or in his case a "Jimmy-stroll" can you imagine him trying to steal second base? Granted he may have an extra 3 feet due to the Jimmy-sticks, but momentum is going to be a definite problem. Now lets find ourselves a new cripple... how about a parapalegic? Sounds good. Now is said parapalegic going to be an Olympic swimmer. Changes are no. It's just too funny though. Watching someone who has even less of a chance at succeeding in the "dream jobs" than I do. I used to think that was never possible. But thanks to a past friend, I know that's entirely untrue... I'm more qualified than all the cripples in the world, and if you're not crippled, so do you! so say it with me now, There's nothing funnier than a cripple with a dream 020829 ... lycanthrope awww...one of my screen names is dionysius cripple 020830 ... silentbob i made a brief comic strip at work about a man who had disfigured hands who tried to get a job at a telemarketing place but his hands were too big and clunky to press individual keys, but he had such a beautiful telephone voice. they fired him. 020904 ... Torch when your in so much pain all you can do is laugh about the little things 020904 ... lost you know potted meat product (it's basically all the left overs ground together and put in a can, it's 20 times worse than hot dogs) thy and i took a can of that and mixed it with mayonaise and were eating it we tossed it on the grass cuz we didnt want anymore well all the popular girls were walking by and it looked just like bird crap sitting on the grass so i say " hey shawn theres some bird shit" and he runs over scoops it off the ground and eats it. not a single popular stuck up prep snob has talked to us since then. i would thank god for that day if i beleived in him. 020904 ... cpg---cripple w/ a dream! u've got to get something straight! the handicapped (never use that term again) r the ones who are never going to do anything in life. the crippled, or the ones, that call themselves crippled---are going to do things, no duh! we're going to get ur sorry AB butts in line...even if we hafta use pity as the weapon. (oh, wait, who wrote this? aimee? no wonder. after all, she hates me.) funny...like haha the joke's on the rednecks of blather! 041006 ... crip w/ a dream sorry, that was self-righteous, but still . . . thanks for the new name, but i'm never talking to aimee again. 041007 ... jack napier aimee's right, you're pretty damn funny 041007 ... the devil dance with me, jack... by the pale moonlight 041007 what's it to you? who go blather from