transplanetary
u24 distance is measured in relative units;

chunks of mud are bound together into what are known as continents, further invisible lines are drawn on what are commonly referred to as maps, and these lines, or borders, define further subdivisions of mud, known as countries.

the mud is separated by expanses of fluid, generally, though inaccurately, referred to as water. the term for these expanses, 'ocean', or 'sea'.

The collective name for a ball of mud and fluid, divided by invisible lines, are planets. note that the fluid is optional, and, as far as current earthean science has discovered, very rare on most mudballs.

mudballs, or planets, are known to circle (or, more accurately, oval) around a large mass of hot burning rock. these rocks, known as stars, vary in size, density and heat. from the particular mudball we inhabit, it is possible, under optimal conditions, to see approximately two thousand burning rocks in the sky.

These burning rocks cluster into clumps of various shapes and sizes, these clumps are known as galaxies. The galaxy that this mudball/burning rock belong to is known as the milky way, presumably as it was discovered by nestlé. (an alternate theory states that when viewed from earth, the branch of the milky way looks rather like spilled milk. this is dubious however, as it blatantly does not (it actually looks like a thin strip of cloud stretching across the sky).)

the burning rocks that we can see (other than the one that earth ovals, known as the sun, or sol) all appear in our clump, it is, however, possible to see other clumps, though only in exceptional circumstances.

Constellations are groups of burning rocks that are nowhere near each other in actual space, yet appear to make cute patterns in the sky when viewed from earth. these patterns undoubtably formed the basis of most early religions. Indeed, the mythology of the ancient greeks is largely based on the passage of these cute patterns across the sky during the year.

interestingly, our entire concept of time is based on these burning rocks. as you will remember, the earth ovals the sun, and spins while doing so (why we don't get dizzy, or fall off when we jump is still a mystery, and modern science has all but given up trying to explain this bizarre phenomenon)

Due the fact that the earth spins and ovals, the stars seem to change position in the sky, returning to their original position after one earth year. this is no co-incidence; as stated, our view of time is based largely on the utterly arbitrary positions of burning rocks in the sky.

there is another type of 'sky rock', one that does not burn. we are, of course, talking about the moon, and other such rocks. these are known as satellites, the earth has one natural one, and approximately 14 billion man made ones, designed for many purposes ranging from television broadcast to internet access to radio broadcast and other such worthy causes. Oh and intercontinental missile defence.

The duration of our months are based on the light cast by sol moving over the piece of rock in the sky, like the stars, once the cycle is complete we start counting again.

no-one knows the origin of the earth day, though interestingly, it tends to get light at the beginning, and dark at the end. as stated, no-one really knows why.

various other bits of rock float about the galaxy, meteors, comets, crisp packets, etc. these do not hit earth, largely due to a fuck off big planet scooping them all up with it's massive gravity pull. thankyou jupiter.

occasionally the concept of intelligent life on other planets is considered, but given that we have found none of earth, the idea that other planets may harbour intelligent life seems somewhat far fetched.

Now, finally, we come to quantum singularities; black holes, white holes, dark blue doughnut shaped things, and the like.

black holes are not, as originally suggested, holes at all, instead, they are very very tiny, but very very heavy lumps of matter (you though I was going to rock, didn't you?) they are, in fact, so heavy, that anything that even gets close will get sucked in to them, due to their immense gravity. it has been said that not even light can escape their pull, to which I say "oh. wow". they're pretty funky things. A theory has stated that inside the black hole, may be an entire universe, another theory says in response "what the fuck have you been smoking, man?", and this is the preferred approach to radical physics.

thankyou for your time. which doesn't exist.
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marked . 041120
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u24 correction going to *say* rock 050121
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stork daddy my favorite sushi roll. 050121
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eric idle Just remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving
And revolving at nine hundred miles an hour,
That's orbiting at nineteen miles a second, so it's reckoned,
A sun that is the source of all our power.
The sun and you and me and all the stars that we can see
Are moving at a million miles a day
In an outer spiral arm, at forty thousand miles an hour,
Of the galaxy we call the 'Milky Way'.
Our galaxy itself contains a hundred billion stars.
It's a hundred thousand light years side to side.
It bulges in the middle, sixteen thousand light years thick,
But out by us, it's just three thousand light years wide.
We're thirty thousand light years from galactic central point.
We go 'round every two hundred million years,
And our galaxy is only one of millions of billions
In this amazing and expanding universe.

The universe itself keeps on expanding and expanding
In all of the directions it can whizz
As fast as it can go, at the speed of light, you know,
Twelve million miles a minute, and that's the fastest speed there is.
So remember, when you're feeling very small and insecure,
How amazingly unlikely is your birth,
And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space,
'Cause there's bugger all down here on Earth.
050121
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nominated :Best_of_Blather 050122
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Bootsy Collins Funk 050122
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