thirty pyriel the number of pieces of silver paid to judas in exchange for being fate's bitch if ever somebody deserved the right to sue the ass of of somebody else, good ol' Judas Iscariot is our plaintiff the words: "Set-up," "screwjob", "framejob," "railroad," "patsy," and of course "scapegoat" come to mind. i ask you, who is the real martyr here anyway? The guy who came knowing he was going to get killed. he planned on his own death knowing he would come waltzing back three days later, he even mentioned it a few times in conversation...is he the victim? or is it the poor naive bastard who was handpicked for the position to sell the so-called "victim" down the river. seems pretty clear cut to me 000812 ... heel turn now there's a thought to shove up charlton_heston's_ass 000812 ... burden A life spent rotating a glass disc is really not that fantastic, now, is it? Hah. Mashed potatoes and everything. 010519 ... ROFL should have invested the money is crosses, seems they were going up everything, he would have made a bundle. 031010 ... jlymry327 thirty punds about right 060704 ... silentbob My mood is less dependent upon what other people think, what my peers think, what potential partners think, what strangers think. I do think about what they think, but I am less affected by it emotionally. I no longer care if i have a partner. I have entered a grazing period. A little bit here and there is preferable to a long haul. I no longer stress about Valentine's Days or other people's engagements and relationships. Attempts to do this feel forced and do not take up much of my attention. I do not get as excited about anything as much as I used to do. Concerts. Vacations. Material possessions. Attempts to do this feel forced and do not take up much of my attention. Many times I am secretly or not-so-secretly pleased plans get cancelled so I can stay in and watch movies and unwind. Unwinding alone is as important to me now as spending time with the people I love. I do not consume music albums or books with the same fervor. I do consume movies and TV shows. I have a smartphone. I have a job. Somewhere in some account I have a 401k. I have savings. I have debt. I don't own a car. I don't have cable. I don't have a landline. I don't own my own house. I still rent. I live alone. I don't have pets. I am a middle-class white male and benefit from white privilege. I think about this at some point every day and feel guilty, but do nothing to change the ways I benefit or the ways others do not. Do you have words? No, nevermind, I have nothing so say. 130212 ... unhinged so far this decade has pretty much sucked 130212 ... no reason i feel the same way as silentbob about a lot of these points, but usually i wonder if most of them are due to apathy/weariness/depression. i don't quite feel thirty, even though i'm pushing thirty-one. a lot of friends who are my age are getting married and buying houses and having kids, and friends who are a few years younger seem ages younger; they go out all the time and have boundless energy. i feel somewhere in the middle. 130213 what's it to you? who go blather from