goddamnit Gordy i think that you must see the ending of the previous page before the one you are at now to find the thing you are looking for. 010331 ... silentbob alkaline_trio 020213 ... silentbob i listened to the cd again last night. its quite a ditty of an album. i don't know how to use words to describe music. if edgy and fun would work. also smart. I care greatly for their self_titled and maybe i'll catch fire cds as well as their last two. Something about those two cds...keeps me coming back for more 020214 ... Aimee I'm getting really tired of this shit. I've been sleeping on the floor for the last 2 months now.... our air mattress popped (not because we're too "wild in bed" just cause it's 5 years old and used way too much or whatever). I'm getting really sick of the backaches, the headaches, the rug burn, the whatever. Yes the logical thing to do would be, go out and buy a bed. Well, unfortunately we can barely afford rent, how the hell are we gonna get a fucking bed then? Jesus Christ I am so sick of this shit..... and something tells me it's just not going to get any better any time soon. 021026 ... Mahayana ! [why cant i just be the fucking "getting away with it all" asshole, if even just for once] ! i wanna be on the otherside- you know the side where you can be a fucking jerk and noone says a goddamn thing ! were gonna be friends and blah blah blah ! im tired of trying to be the "good guy" cuz i always fucking LOSE- you give your heart you give your all- and youre still not good enough !fuck me for trying to love&love well goddamnitgoddamnitgoddamnit 021027 ... Keegan Why is everything so frustrating? WHY DID ADAM AND EVE HAVE TO EAT THAT APPLE GODDAMNIT?!?!Why does it have to be so hard for us all? Is our perception of easy as accurate as our perception of hard? Do you mean easy like a whore? or easy as easy-going? Do you mean hard like a penis? Or hard like difficult? Do you have to feel like such a slut when you kiss him? does he ever think of you as a goddess? I bet he doesn't. Maybe that's why you feel like a slut. Because you know he doesn't love you and never will. Don't sell, yourself like that, especially for free. Does she take advantage of you? Does she slap you and call you crazy and a dog every time you don't call her or don't buy her flowers for no reason? Maybe you need a Goddamn therapist, your mother says. It plays over and over in your head. You want to scream, and when you do, she slaps you and tells you that you're a fast-mouthed little fuck with nothing in your future. You need some help my friend. You need a lake. Jump in in and wash away your sickness. 031229 ... PUNK ! the big apple... why did EVE eat the apple ? i don't know? must check wikipedia.. like i have ever read the Bible ! for fucks sake any religion makes me .. ummm... what can i say sick... yeah - really. i love buddhism though cos it is real. but the funny thing withthe people that "practice" it is that.... well... it ain't so difficult to see there is a tree and flower ! sitting on a mat trying... aitn't going to help you realise that you are alive ! ha ! i sit on a flattened cardboard box when i am a nomad ! i sit in a busy bus stop ! see.. if you try ... and loook an d look and loook you are jsut an idiot ! cos you were born weren't you ! go to a mountain if you want peace. go to a party with cool music if you want to get high. i took drugs too... you know why.. cos everyone was in pain.. me too.. you tooo.. everyone tooo. love is a contagious disease simple as that. the people that take exty pills know that... i took them too ! me ain't no sinner ! 070503 what's it to you? who go blather from