anunbecoming Lief a bale of blood, drained from waters of flood. a trestle of tendons strained from its mud. and a vessle of veins and a lip'suc of brains begottled and bottled from a fit man's remains. a gallon of talons a vassal for hassles a maid of high melons a fop for his tassles. then ring up some lightning and dial up a cliff and call up two hippies and summons one stiff. dice and blend until smooth. as the waltz begins, en vacuum; spiralling my particle sauce standing behind each moment of matter the ghost of what it was i smile upon the chaos file my pinky reminisce of laos create a stinky and inhale the mixture breath bolting in full bore like me full bore not half nor unsure not ajar nor a door and i wake, of course, i am lying on the floor like a whore of war or perhaps, less sore... and there, washed up on the shore, beside me, betide me i see you. 060917 ... Lief your eyes are as wide as the water is blue and as blighted and frighted as knighted are true, and i wonder a smidgeon my dovetail, my pigeon, if your wingtips are silver if your liver is ridging and rolling and rising like waves on a wind of winter wrought wayfarers, scuttled then skinned; but for that betrayal that moment of doubt as a friend i am faithful i duck, i pull out, diving forever to wherever is away, my beast from your breast my death from your day my fangs deny the famished shine elicited once visited by the bright of your eye. and lone on the dusk i will wish i had plucked one just one saphire to comfort me like water - sooth my heart - for hot is the ever burning edge of night (or pinched your pink lips to tape to my cheek) (or trapped your thin tongue that tomorrow we'd speak) it is then i taste a silver crunch in my teeth and i wonder if i did or if i didn't. and if i had have ... ? could i know? 060918 ... Lief as the light does shorten the night does grow 060918 ... Lief tiring of the twilight i chase the sun driving backward through the dusk ressurecting from, reversing, the falling night but stabbing into the day i find its clarity burns my brain bleeds my eyes to strain the real in a shroud of red eyelashes then feathers then wings i shield my eyes and face covered i fall tail over beak a duck shot by bullets of day i should have known i should never have tried i could never make the morning soft thud the gutter hits me winded i lie beside a drain -a taste of dark, beam of promise- an escape toward it i roll flop on my back wings folded in the dark on tunnels mould i hide from my own foolishness i sigh in the funnel of shade 060920 ... Lief recounting the thousand lives that washed down this hole, inhale them as my own and slowly strengthen; the grit of death a varied seasoning, coloured and crunching to my essence; the many wings of tiny corpses, rainbow fly-wire, eyelash woven; each shining eye, each carapace; i breath this blessing, this holy space, gourd of sacrifice, sanctity of unclaimed ends; i drown within this broth, drink it, my own. 060920 ... Lief recovering recouperating reviving twilight sings in the sinusoidal peak of light bends toward its trough halfway down that hill my eyes snap open fine whiskers on my eyelids roll out the momentum of the sudden opening of consciousness wet eyeballs shine small pupils stare black pins in cold green marbles and my neck snaps straight and my beak points upward my ears find from far away the goodnight words of other birds the yowls of hungry cats winding through legs and ankles in doorways for dinner tails twining over knees foul cats i scowl feathers of my eyebrows darken and the howls of dogs whose owners are yet not home lonely dogs scratching at carpet beneath doors sniffing the scent through where they left out on the hunt without their hound indignant dogs whining left alone again sulk shit in the shoes that domestic world it makes me vomit right there i have to roll to gain my feet as my neck rolls like a wave to evict acid and stone i stand refreshed there is nothing wrong with me i ruffle my feathers grit my teeth but i am hungry little lives brought me back but bigger lives are there to take i want one of those oh yes i do 060920 ... Lief flexing the wings at my sides arching the spine in my back stretching the stick of my neck digging the claws on my feet into the concrete beneath them scratch_scrape_inscribe they leave their marks i look up to the hole above street lights shine beyond cold beams on my tongue to show me a life ending 060926 what's it to you? who go blather from