i_prefer_you pushpins you asked me if i prefer you head over heels or heels over head and I never replied but the silence was not loud enough and as particular that you could take notice. You gave me two choices when I prefer the base of your wonder, oh I just prefer y o u. You were not here to witness the visibilty of my awe and the flush in my cheeks. you couldn't feel the speeding beat of my hyperactive heart when you drown me in such beautiful hopes and you revive me with your passive affections and then you trap me inside of your mind. I feel the interior but it melts away at my touch, i am enraptured at the way your thoughts bend and twist into infinite sparks of unreality, the endless way we are its more than flesh and blood can bear so the words I speak of you hold much of the pressure you put on me all the pleasure you put me through is all too much to take without a chaser, so I just write away your seraphic ideas and i depend on my words to keep me sane. I prefer just you... 020721 ... farmfish i wish i was her real boy. 020721 ... distorted tendencies I do,I do! If only you were not so insecure.. 020721 ... lycanthrope ideas i send out flawlessly in that they are longing fictions. signifiers devoid of the signified. dream states given the necessary logic and binding words of my everyday. but don't you pull me back into them. don't make me feel the recoil or the possibility of my own words. it will make me weak. it will turn my eyes glassy and towards you, though i know not whre that is. 020721 ... lycanthrope my words are a tomb, a labyrinth, a catacomb. they fall away at the touch but there are always more. but to promise me the freeing silence of your body, is to make me forgetful. in my hope i become overwhelmed by even the thin walls, i forget which words to make real. and i'm lost in the half reality of poetry. even the things i touch are suddenly not enough in this twisting attempt at ephemeral pins. because i prefer you. 020721 ... JustOnMoNnday I prefer you on your knees screaming my name. 040804 ... sadistical You are fucking eVil! 040805 ... daxle mocket 040805 ... no reason i don't like you, but i_prefer_you 040806 ... kookaburra to a hole in the head...but not much else 040806 ... unhinged 'you are my ecstasy' 040807 ... Fudge i perfer you to him. i always have. he doesnt care about me like you do. he doesnt treat me like you do. i only wish i knew that sooner. 040807 ... Syrope tonight i referred to you as my boyfriend. i had to stop and knit my eyebrows together and study the word on my screen. you're not, but it was the only way to describe you to this...intruder. this /person/ who hasn't watched me blossom in the warmth of your attentions, who hasn't seen me go from absolutely depressed to bubbling with joy at the slightest glance from you. what was i supposed to say? soulmate, treasure, angel, salvation? for the first time since i can remember, i just don't /want/ anyone but you. new guys, guys i would have killed for a few months ago, regular bed-fellows...suddenly i don't see any way they could be better than you. eer. and instead of seeing the danger in this and treading softly, i'm dancing on this ice and delighting in the cracks that shoot out from me like lightning. it doesn't make much sense all i know is i_prefer_you to anyone else and i trust this with_all_my_heart 040807 ... misstree is drunk again my solution was not "boyfriend" but "Best." ("best what?" "*secretive grin* best everything.) even for three months of absence, i realized i don't really like to fuck boys anymore. you spoiled me on them. you're nearly the only boy i want to fuck. (there may be a few twisted_souls out there worth tumbling, but after a few goes, well, they'll bore me too.) and in vokka's grip, i am thoroughly convinced that what you prefer, is something else. which is fine. as long as you still teach me. 040808 ... witchesrequiem sleeping. 040808 ... Borealis I prefer you... and whatever it was that made you keep me at arms length for six months... I prefer you to the ones who are more than willing to take... 040813 what's it to you? who go blather from