concerning_all_these_broken_mirrors dipperwell broken mirrors aren't depressing because everyone gets revolted by their own reflection sometimes the concept of your broken heart enthralls me as much as watching your black nailpolish dry being swallowed in eternal darkness sounds like a dismal preoccupation but hey if that's what makes you happy perhaps no one understands or wants me either and god I'm so unloved but you won't hear a peep out of me and society is oppressing this rejecting that, conforming to these but your shoes were made in china too and buying coke from high school girls to master that emaciated wasted hot look of couture proportions is just absurd your suffering is excruciating clearly and conveniently excuses you from trying to be a good person - coast on your pain and everything is doom and hellfire and we believe in nothing and spiral downward flapping our arms to go faster but concerning all these broken mirrors for every one you smash in a tantrum I will make repairs and see a wonderland 050929 ... Doar . 050930 ... oldephebe I've started 'looking into the heart of light' to get ME through. I'm tired of seeing and hearing my shadow staggering behind me, clinging and tracing every thought, dragging my soul down, so that every breath bursts from me in gusts like some violent sigh colored with the brown/gray of a winter fog. I am praying that we ALL would recieve after seeking God as our spirit in union with His is led to recieve and realize a perfect union with a perfecting Love, so that the thing, that shattered aspect of ourselves shouting at us and in us from the shards of that broken mirror, .... ................................... completely lost my train of thought there what you wrote said everything better than i can hope to say it stay blessed dipperwell how are your studies coming along and how were your holidays? ... in the dark sometimes as i flail upon my bed, i wonder what is it that is so resolutely marching its way up and down my bones...with such purpose, with the will and the implacable will of an iron booted plattoon seting torches to marrow and some honor guard of damnation watching giddy at the window as the cold spectral crystal flame spread across the plane of my body and in that moment i pray to be anointed, for the mists to be parted and the revelation of holy unjudgemental and perfecting love to be revealed, the greater reality this is what will save us take no thought of me, of my fractured syntax, my elaborate verbiage, only know that my heart is for you, and you and you and you and that i know a measure of sorrow of watering the dead root with the springs of my sorrow of feeling my heart flutter like a doves dying sweetly singing breast like the hazlenut held in the palm of a womans soft palm or the iron heart encased in velvet broken open softly having weathered the scourges of experience, of contempt of a careless and unworthy love of so many who could not see her honour, her glory and yet she emerged from it with her eyes glowing with the light of His Love her soul undiminished by all she'd been through although every second drug its way through her like a claw burrowing madly into the corridors of every living screaming cell, she got a truer reflection of her beauty of her perfectedness and all the noise in her heart, in the world, around her dimmed and she felt her soul no more haunting the darkened corners under bridges she felt herself no longer needing as much to anesthetize herself or to deny herself the bounty of her inheritense of fleshly beauty to aspire to some cadaverous, skeletal emblem of beauty ... take care, dipperwell ... 060113 what's it to you? who go blather from