andrea feeling an odd sort of abandonment
of care and demanding what i want
while remaining surprisingly apathetic
to the actions others enforce on me
this freefaliing tendency has never
been a favorite of mine
i've always demanded control and
refused to lessen my grip on my life
and not knowing the cause of this change
really more of a recognition of self
is what frightens me the most
silvre everyone wants something from me. every person in and every aspect of my life demands something. sometimes i think i'll crumble. but then i should take care of myself before others, right? 000709
birdmad unlike those before me,
i didn't make any.

i was perfectly willing to accept whatever landed on my shoulders without fighting it.

i was content to roll with the punches
(and there were many)

well fuck all that now.

i want.
sabbie but i'm too busy
living my life
to wash the dishes
or vaccum the floor
to sweep
and mop
or polish.

samantha might well have been the perfect housewife,
but i never had a hope in hell of wiggling my nose
in such a charming fashion
kipper samantha was the perfect housewife could out-pour, but I had never a hope in the hell of wiggling my nose on such a bezaubernde way 040414
uglytruth the man's. 060411
unhinged 'but i want to make a final observation about demands. when our critics use the word 'demands,' they mean: tell some legislator or administrator what you want him or her to do for you. gather your own initiative, your self-activity, and your righteous outrage into a bundle, and give it to someone else to act in your place. tell somebody else what you want them to do for you.

but i say: yes, we should vote. yes, we should support this bill and oppose that one. yes, we should give president obama some pressure from what subcomandante marcos calls 'below and to the left,' and thereby give the president some excuse to do what, in his heart of hearts, he no doubt often would really like to do.

but this is not our highest priority. our most urgent objective is not to give someone else authority to act on our behalf. our greatest need is not to hand over to somebody other than ourselves the responsibility to remake the world.

no, we need to remake the world ourselves, right now, from below and to the left. i am appalled at the poverty of imagination that has been shown in the last thirty years in the mahoning valley (youngstown) regarding what is to be done. a 'shrinking city'? what kind of development strategy is that for a community that is already losing it's young people? tearing down buildings without knowing what to put in their place? give me a break. a bulldozer can do that. it is not a plan of action, a vision, worthy of human beings.

the chamber of commerce is anxious to obliterate the memory of youngstown's militant labor history. there used to be a plaque, right here in federal plaza, commemorating the little steel strike of 1937. when the streets through downtown were reconfigured for the fifth or sixth time, the plaque disappeared. don't worry, staughton, i am told, it's in a museum. yeah, i answer, and that's precisely the problem.

the fact is that new ideas are up and about in the mahoning valley but not in corporate boardrooms or in the corridors of power. one example of a program that needs to be supported and developed is the idea of providing much of the valley's food with produce grown locally. let me blunt: this is a wonderful idea. but it must become an activity that offers full-time employment to young people trying to grow up and survive in the inner city, or it will remain a middle-class fad, and those young people will leave the area in desperation or wind up behind bar.'

- staughton lynd
what's it to you?
who go