still_searching_skies Mahayana [~{i need you}~] 020318 ... blown cherry for satellites, comets and shooting stars. for a way outta this place. 020318 ... Toxic_Kisses Look! A UFO!! 020318 ... -{::EphemeralArcs::}- The silence of the ground churns, a welcome unmoving earth, slow and comfortable. But i look upward, and i know, that's where my home is. 020318 ... Ariadani cloudcover threatens rain but i look up to try and find the stars not through any longing or loss, but simply searching. time drifts through the clouds, and though it is dark, my eyes wont sleep and my mind churns with questions questions of love questions about hope questions about faith questions that i dont know the meaning of questions i dont know the answer to. happiness is a funny thing and complete joy a fleeting feeling, even at its depths to young to be jaded and cynical but feeling the weight of the world's requirements on my mind i feel old and tired without a place to go rickety as a 1000-year old porchswing fragile as a dried rose listening to the same old songs that haunt my dreams, even in consciousness. friends family ice cold the wind whistles through my mind and i feel lonely, even with all my attempts to decieve myself into thinking otherwise. the sadness flows around me in the air currents of the clouds, it affects me, though i try so hard not to give in. i still search the skies, as rain falls around me in icy tears i wait. 020318 ... Mahayana with fallen moons for hands and broken fears as comets [{im running out of sky}] :if only dear: if only if 020424 ... silentbob begging the sky for lightning bolts 020424 ... blown cherry for the beauty I cannot find down here. And still for that ride to the stars with the future_boy, but I haven't found him yet. 020513 ... lobsterman if he's a future boy...he obviously doesn't exist yet, at least not how he's supposed to...so you should just stop looking. Besides...we can never predict who we're gonna love...if we could...we would know everything about who we are and where we're going. And just the fact that whenever i turn on the TV i hear the rich fake jamaican accent of my favorite tv psychic illustrates that we don't and can't know all that. It'd be like being able to predict the universe. And if we could do that, we'd be nobody. Personality is a searching, a searching stance. What would an omnipotent personality be like? more like the skies than the search. The skies may be beauty, but to feel beauty you can't be the sky. Cryptic enough? 020513 ... i am jacks fondness for astronomy convergences and eclipses 020513 ... reitoei everywhere a lonely eye turns upon the dusky twilight sky. searching, looking, dreaming searhing for something strange in the orange and violet flamed death of the sun crashing to the mortal world below. someone with unsated desire and dreams sinking with the dimming sun turns slowly under dim moonlight to return to a night of unfulfilled solitude, dreaming of the next opportunity. 020513 ... powerbabe isle of skies pestle ewe wednesday noah tie me knee fun win eyed oh no mice elf 020513 ... pushpins for a peice of myself. 020514 ... phil looking for death 030114 ... littleidiot i'm praying for rain. 030115 ... skinny point you inside out 040607 what's it to you? who go blather from