dallas I play with this thing. 980827
FooLmOOn its so much fun and the beads roll back and forth .. try putting them under your tounge. its like magic. run it up and down in and out of your fingers and when u are done let it go and smile 991015
Vrykolaka We travel on, this windy winding road called suspicion leads us only towards what we already knew. Why give in when it's obviously so much easier to give out? I'd like to say I learned something from the vast array of mistakes I've slept with but I just swore off gratuitous lying last week and my therapist says it'd be counter productive to scream his name during sex. 000304
redmocd after all, the sex wasn't that great. i can't help but feel sorry for the poor sap at times. he sucked in bed. there, i finally said it. yet you suck just as well. why am i here confiding in this hollow box when i'm a boy and not a girl? maybe its because i can't help but incessantly blather to this, this grand experiment in thought control. 020618
Valentine The staff is prodding with broken swords and toneless voices. I am not the dull witted child you think I am, and your cellophane antics are tiring - also fueling the impending eruption that is the cause of my journey to the void. 030324
eyedream dreams dreams I feel so alone sweetheart 030507
estarocks always happening...always...4ever & ever... 040614
estarocks always happening...always...4ever & ever...always... 040614
krupt it doesnt stop... 050210
krupt it doesnt stop... 050210
tail-devouring snake things i was told by my mom and stepdad this week:

i am selfish
i am a manipulative bitch
i am a narcissist
i am making bad choices
i am making worrying choices
because i am _, i am raising red flags
there's no point in talking to me
they have to tiptoe around me
i think i'm better than everyone
i do what i want to
i've said i do whatever i want to
i have some likable qualities
i am a good mother
i am doing a great job at raising my daughter
tail-devouring snake they have supported me this past year. conditionally. at a high cost. i have slept under their roof, eaten on their dime, rested while they cared for my baby. at the cost of being told how horrible i am. at being told i am sick, i am wrong, i am not trustworthy, i am bad. 160529
flowerock. It's hard to depend on anyone. It's hard to live with parents as an adult. It's hard to be a parent. It's hard to believe it will get better sometimes, but it will.

Keep waking up and greeting the day. Keep working towards your happiest_self.

Remember_to_forgive others for their judgements, forgive_yourself as well.

Everything_with_love, even if it's bitter sometimes.
unhinged the world tells me i am not enough
i believe it

could i possibly get a break?
some break?
any break?
the corporation i work for
treats me like shit
then the union i pay
to fight the corporation
and i get nothing

just another episode
in the on going show
that is the 'screw her cause we can' show
it happens at work
it happens on the bus
it happens at home
it happens with friends and lovers

take take take
more more more

the depression of incessant effort
that never amounts to anything
but pain and injustice
makes me regret
flowerock. Perhaps it is naive and even inconsiderate to say "it will get better". Does it always? Does better really mean anything other than a shift in perception?
I hope better is real.
I_am_happy but I am not without stress, heartache, or dreams of better days.
It takes so much, but maybe that's where we go wrong, stop giving, stop taking, and just let it flow, is that even possible?
what's it to you?
who go