circumstances_and_expectations Sonya If by circumstance you are reading this, please read all the way to the end. Perhaps I wrote this especially for you. People seem to complain about the circumstances they get themselves into. I think that if we engage in irrational actions based on some whim that came out of the blue, we should not be surprised that the people around us will give us irrational reactions. This may include our close friends and our family. Basically we reap what we sow when we want to do something totally off the wall that we KNOW is risky. We have no right to complain about circumstance because circumstance is pliable. We can modify it to our advantage or to our disadvantage most of the time. The rest of the time Fate steps in and has a little fun with us. Whenever we end up with sorrow because of bad decisions we often wonder where we went wrong. It's usually at this time when we remember how others tried to warn us or guide us in the right direction but we were too stubborn to heed their advice. People get so caught up in their search for happiness that they will try to obtain it at any or all costs. Sometimes the price is far too high because it could be your own heart. Sometimes we cling to one source of happiness so much that we are willing to throw away other possible sources of happiness. To do this in my opinion, is a grave mistake. I know because I was there once. Not too long ago I was contemplating just giving up a lot of the most important things in my life just so I could hold onto the biggest source of my happiness at the time. (Yes a person.) I realized that I just couldn't trade in one source of happiness for the other, and as a result I did lose this "source" of happiness I was willing to sacrifice everything for. So what does this mean about anything? It means everything. The circumstances of our lives can be changed in such a way that we could literally change our lives right at this very moment for better or worse. Most of us get caught up in the moment when we're in love and sadly we need to have our hearts and our heads broken in order to have some sense of rationality again. It's just too bad that some people literally fuck up their lives due to love and they aren't the same ever again. Not only that, but they also throw away opportunities other people in the world would kill for. There are people out in the world who can't even read or write. Those of us who visit blather know how important words are and how important it is to be able to express yourself with words. If we have opportunities at our feet, we shouldn't throw them away just because they seem difficult right now. The difficulties make our lives worthwhile and I really believe that genuine love and genuine happiness can endure any difficulties. I guess I'm a hypocrite in saying that. I believe in making sacrifices for those you care about, but some sacrifices shouldn't be made. A person who is miserable only makes the one who loves them miserable. When we focus on one thing in our lives and only that thing, we end up miserable. You may be wondering where I am coming from in saying all of this. My own experiences fuel my words. I thought many times about just dropping out of college and maybe just doing something really drastic or crazy that probably would have made me happy temporarily but ultimately it would have killed me internally. I knew that if I did something like that it would have pissed off my family to no end and I realized that much of my happiness in MY life actually comes from my family. I couldn't be happy if my relationship with my relatives was a disaster, even though I might have saved a love that I've since lost. It's sort of like trading one happiness for another. When we are forced into such a situation it really means that something is wrong because true happiness comes from harmony, not dissention. I don't really know what I'm trying to say here, but I read what everyone on here writes. I even read the stuff from people who have been hurtful or hateful to me and despite it all I do feel a sense of compassion for these people. I know what they're going through (though they may deny it) and I can only hope they bother to read what I write because we are all the same here. I found this site through circumstance that I created. We have more control over our lives than we think. Sometimes Fate just steps in and makes something happen in order to get us to open our eyes. Sometimes circumstance is in our hands. We just have to know when and how to change it for the better in the long run. 011106 ... shorlove Cereal Ethics with a hint of Emotions. 030422 what's it to you? who go blather from