falling_over_giggling_senselessly
farmfish have to tell yo sumpthin a wee bit funny that happened to happen sunday aftanoon at the ski school. ya see, kevin, me, and fyn work there togetha, when we're around, the boss is cool, good friend of ours and lets us come and go fairly easy as long as one of us is about. plus, we do the indoor entertainment(as well as outdoor instruction), clown shows, puppets, facepaintin' and shit, which no one else has a clue, so we're, i guess, valuable enuf to consider keepin'. we get upwards to 1oo kids from 3 states come on the week-end so it'd be absolute chaos without some kind of organised fun, which mostly fyn orchestrates. he's a fucking riot. he's usually so calm, until the make-up and big shoes go on.

anywho, he was doin' a show yestaday, and the kids were all piled up around the stage. me da' built this really colorful wooden village 12' long when he was well. it sits as a backdrop. fyn duz this act when he starts fake-cryin' for some sillyass reason. and he pulled up his red and white striped shirt to fake-blow his nose and i swear for only one quick second you could see his hairy belly...

fuck! you should have seen this little girl in the front row. like she saw a freakin' ghost or sumthin' her eyes, like rolled back in her head and she playacted like she was passin' out.(kids think clowns aren't real people, think they're made of marshmallows) of course you had to be there, but later that night we wuz talkin' 'bout it and dyin'. he has hundreds of stories like that. me, i'm usually behind the village in a window woiken puppets. sometimes i'll come out front and work stinker crink, a hand puppet that looks like the cookie munsta's baby cousin. i don't even throw my voice. i just talk 'em straight out. it must have sumthin with the way i do it, but no kid ever says i'm talkin' 'im. it's crazy. "bring out the bad humour puppets," one kid said. i do make a lot of farting noises and changing diaper remarks. it's fun, what can i say?
020114
...
Grievance dennis, mr. farmfish.

your life seems to be an epic constant of many meaningful days of laughter. I feel happy for you and morn my apparent loss at the same time.

Life, true is what you make it. And mine, is so wavering and indistinct, that it really does always change, ephemeral, evanecent... the fog disipating from the corner of your eyes. That's why i have learn my version of passion, and learn it well. Passion can be either quiet or loud.
depth or ambition. though, both depth and ambition are needed.

I salute thee.
020115
...
unhinged i would have never believed it
if i hadn't seen it with my own
eyes
your beautiful face
finally happy
and it was radiating
this wonderful light
playing songs
i couldn't remember happy
you strengthened me
when i couldn't strengthen myself
and i wanted to take a picture
to immortalize these few happy minutes
when my face hurt
from the smile i couldn't chase away
i've loved you for so long
wishing
hoping
praying
that i could see this day
and now that it's finally come
i don't know what else to say
thank god
for girls
beautiful ass shaking girls
we were all in the covenant
of your smile
laughing
happy drunk
at silent words unspoken
and all the other words
running through my mind
don't do justice
to the happiness
we have all deserved
but finally gain
tonight
020115
what's it to you?
who go
blather
from