obligation_free_love
sabbie
[for the children of my heart
the battered ones
the torn ones
the broken ones
and the ones who are healing]

here is my love.
it is my gift to you.

i want nothing for it.
i ask for nothing in return.

there are no weird demands
no odd obligations
nothing at all you need to do in return.

i give you my love
simply because you deserve it.
simply
because.

i give you my love
because i love you.

nothing more
nothing less.


my heart is big enough
to hold many loves
and you are one of them.

and that, in itself, is enough
that you Are
is enough
for me
040308
...
misstree sabbin8or,

"i love you for free."

went into an australian shop earlier today, and many were the warm fuzzy thoughts sent in your general direction. i'm verymuchso glad you exist, even if you are damnably far away.
050711
...
sab you know misstree, today was good, WAY better than expected, and even funny, at some parts.

and i reckon i gots you to thank for that.

one day, babe, one day the gap'll close and i'll buy the first drink.
promise.
050711
...
mt glad to be of cervix, m'dear,
and glad you could catch a whiff of the wonderful fabulous awesome day i was having
and i'm holding you to that drink
even if it has to wait til valhalla.
050711
...
iNsEcUrE_GoTh_GiRl she said that only your parents love you unconditionally; that they were the only ones that could ever do that.

she made it sound like that was the best love that you could have in your life.

but i don't feel like that.
my parents seem to be distant to each other, and i've never had a solid and loving family.

i've always felt very isolated, from family and friends alike.
so now i have a closeknit group that i feel are more my family than my blood relatives have ever felt.

maybe all people feel like that.

but that almost made me cry, when she said that.
becuase that is not love to me.
that does not feel like love, it feel like an obligation to love.
i don't feel very loved, to put it as childishly, selfishly and whiningly as possible.
if thats the best love you can have, what hope is there?

unrequited love really isn't that great, and the platonic love i have right now for my friends, although it is so appreciated and needed, isn't enough.

why do i crave obligation_free_love when apparently i have it?

this isn't real, please say there is something better.

i can feel untapped reservoirs of love inside me, sandwiched between layers of cynicism and worldweariness.
maybe i'll never have that reciprocated, and i be mutual.

the majority of love in this world isn't reciprocated. i've seen my so called 'happy' parents, and they really dont seem to love each other.

divorce is unlikely, but you can see the hollow emptiness where there used to be more. i don't understand how it can change so much. there are many reasons for it i can see, but it makes me so disinclined to love.
050711
...
Lemon_Soda Its not who loves you, its who you love. Nicholas Cage said that, in the movie Adaptation. The trick is to love uncoditionaly yourself. Waiting for it to happen or looking for it where you've already established its not is only going to depress you. You might think only a fool would do that, because its obvious that someone is going to throw it in your face or take advantage of you. First, you cannot go through life without expecting some trouble, how you handle it defines your character. Second, you don't need their love if they decide to treat you that way. Finally, the one person who really matters will know that you really meant it and still do: you. Thats right. Your love will always be real to you, and not alot of people can say they beleived in it, fostered it, helped it grow, and gave it away without any strings. We have to become what we're searching for in this world, because thats the one place I know we can find it. Where it already is, right there inside you. Don't tell me its not, because you commune with it everyday when you yearn for it, hope for it, and look for it in other people. Feed the flame, don't be afraid. Act it, think it, and pretty soon, you'll be it. 050712
...
neesh . 050712
...
next to Nobody love_momentarily 050712
...
unhinged i found myself staring at
the book you sent me
on my shelf recently


pandemic library closure
brings me back to
old_favorites
201012
what's it to you?
who go
blather
from