i'm_back_on_my_prozac blue star I can already feel my emotions fading away. They come in spurts... but for the most part, they're leaving me. This is what I hate and am forced to love about prozac. It's like an emotional painkiller... like novacaine for my inner self. It kills off all variations from a norm, with the exception of a few ridiculous outbursts. I want my passion back. I want my lunar cycles of emotions. I want it all back. I just can't handle it. Sometimes I wonder if it's {society} that's telling me that what I experience is not good for me... maybe it's the way I was intended to be... battling constantly with thoughts of inadequacy, suicide, and hermitage. Maybe I'm supposed to kill myself. Survival of the fittest and all that. If this was spoken by anyone else I'd be horrified... because souls and spirits are so precious... we lose enough of the great ones that we can't spare any more of any quality at all... I'm pretty sure my soul is worth saving. My spirit though... I loathe it. Prozac keeps my mind off of that a bit, distracts me from the disdain that oozes from my pores in an unconscious reaction to my spirit... It's disgusting really. I'm willingly taking a drug that will brainwash me. No one in a white coat is shoving it down my throat, and my parents didn't even know that I went off of it for that period of time. I don't know what the point is. Is it that it alters my reality enough to make it livable? Is it that the serotonin in my brain is finally balanced and I am now one step closer to achieving the perfection that medical science is constantly elevating? Or is it that my doctors and the drug companies have seeded their way into my confused and teenaged brain and convinced me that I need this stuff to fix myself? I've sold my soul. 020712 ... Skeezic Prozac + Depression = Relief. Not perfect relief, but relief all the same. Amphetamines + ADD = Focus. Not perfect focus, but focus all the same. 020714 ... jessicafletcher i totally understand. i try and try to stop taking my paxil, but without it, i am tooooooooo emotional. i cry on quick whims, and my anger is damn near uncontrollable. when i get upset, i vomit, and that leads to loads of complicated health problems when you get upset a lot. i'm headed straight for an ulcer. tomorrow at 8:00 i will take another tiny pink normalizer, and once again i will be just like everyone else. 020714 ... silentbob i feel so abnormal cuz i'm not depressed 021105 ... p2 do you get depressed about not being depressed? 021105 ... Piso Mojado ups and downs are too much. not sleeping lonely but my major tip off is noticing that i get depressed reading the news. i know im back to last year, when i couldnt get through "Ishmael" because i took too seriously/personally the harm the human race is causing the planet. (ie i should kill myself because there is nothing good in humanity) back again and ready to be medicated. 040225 ... kitsch ishmael, trainspotting. prozac and paxil... my entire goddamn family is on it, dad, gran, dads bro... my mother, if she doesnt watch herself, get the f- out of here. f'ing xanax and depricap are passed out like salt and pepper. adults are supposed to act normal, eh, so as not to upset the kiddies? so that they are, in their "own domestic and socially acceptable way, also a drug addicts"- renton, t'spotting. 040226 ... homer on drugs prozac goes on prozac goes off prozac goes on prozac goes off . 040226 ... unhinged . 180812 what's it to you? who go blather from