lessons_in_attachment
unhinged joseph_and_i
john_and_i
the_frank_folio ( frank_folio ?)

i should be content
to give them the love they need
i should be content
i should be content
their contentedness making me content
i should be content


but i am not so realized
what about the love i need?
061123
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f why don't you go outside and scream

DO IT !
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!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it's best not to be attached unless you know he's the one 061123
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unhinged i am well aware of the dangers of attachment; i have been blatheing about it for years....


attachment is the number one cause of misery and suffering
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pete attachment is hard to get rid of, easier to ignore. but to not attach is to run the risk of never attaching. i'd rather struggle through these processis of decoupling than to have never opened up at all. 061124
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pete rather mechanical, that metaphor no? 061124
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the awful truth i had a dream that you and me were on the spanish steps
where in my adolescence on these steps smoked cigarettes
before a setting sun of orange red and gold and
i captured it on film and put the photo in the folds of

my black notebooks
where
i keep my heart
and
i spill it nightly
and sometimes
rip it apart
and sometimes
crumple and crease and
maybe
even burn
or
leave it on the shelf for years
and wait for it to turn

my black notebooks that i hold close to me
well i dont know if its sanity or insecurity
does the writer write to spill passion to a page
or does he write to talk to himself
He's so lonely he can't think
does he keep notebooks black on shelves
for referencing
or is it
that one final push you need for fully deciding

to
jump out the door
of that
moving truck
we are
on the highway and i'm
feeling stuck
i've been reading all of
my black notebooks
where
i keep my heart
and
i'm going nowhere.

here's one
lesson in attachment
if i can relate:
you put pensieve thoughts in written sieves
and then you think you're safe
but these thoughts are fleeting
and you can't even
think you'll tie them down
because they'll never stay,
you look back in years,
i swear you'll never figure how

you EVER thought the way you did,
your naivety has plummeted,
or so you say,
when reading back,
this kid is green; a child;
whack.

So this lesson in attachment
If I can
articulate
Sit and think
Sure
but
Don't stay up too late


Save some time for dreams
They're all that you got
They're a glimpse inside your soul
and they'll be gone, for sure,
when you wake up.
061124
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pete its more worrying that it seems like ive lost my best friend than ive lost my girlfriend. the only combining factor is that they were one and the same. 061125
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u24 1) compose your email
2) Click 'file'
3) Click 'attach'
4) Choose the file you wish to attach
5) Click 'save'
6) Send the email.

bad joke, sorry.
061125
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pete perhaps i'm not losing my bestfriend. i just have to get used to different ways of saying hello and goodbye. especially goodbye. the lack of a kiss hit me hollow. 061126
what's it to you?
who go
blather
from