things_i_have_given_up_on x -believing that my brother will get better -believing that someone will want to be with me until i die -getting paid for sex -thinking about killing myself -methamphetamine -seeking physical abuse -late night drives to the ocean to clear my mind -pressing the snooze button more than once 040223 ... ethereal being listened to. understanding those who refuse to hear what is so blatantly loud and meant to be heard. Hello!!! I'm here!! ...still nothing. no reply. instant condemnation. 040223 ... girl_jane Going a day without feeling every single emotion a person can feel...good and bad. Why can't I be stable for just one day? 040223 ... white_wave because being stable would be boring... 040223 ... birdmad • heroin • heavy drinking • religion • trying to live up to whatever the hell it was my parents expected of me while they were here • being overly trusting • various crimes and misdemeanors • three quarters of my favourite junk foods • bar fights • any number of cheap thrills • believing...("toujours et un jour," chere?... je le crois toujours si vous me croyez toujours quand je le dis) 040224 ... jimmy there are somethings you can't give up on without giving up on so much more 040224 ... sameolme how do you give up on illusions without giving up on life? 040224 ... Death of a Rose narcotics, my trust, my heart, my blather wife shipping me a card, misstree answering my question, misstree answering her e-mail, blatherers to not be so damn lazy (myself included), promises made, promises taken. 040224 ... minnesota_chris doing stupid things just because everybody thinks I should. dairy products bacon and sausage looking for a girlfriend, pretty much, especially one who is at all similar to me asking mom for advice, or pretty much any deep conversation at all with her. salsa dancing, pretty much all dancing making chocolate candies (for now) doing what I'm told lots of friends who have grown up and have kids and mortgages now 040224 ... whitechocolatewalrus thinking people truly care about me my parents will stop fighting my parents will care about what i think friends calling me getting more sleep 040224 ... x i lied about the snooze button 040309 ... once again -Love like I think it should be -Life like I used to believe it was -You like I want you to be -Me like I'm not 040309 ... mon the things i have given up on 040309 ... smurfus rex -counseling psych -changing the system -catching the Tiger 040309 ... jane i wish i could say giving up 040309 ... kaibutsu believing. yes, in anything. now bug off before i'm forced to sic my pet ferret on you. 040309 ... dramatica getting paid for sex? that's bizarre. worrying too much true love being a millionaire **singers 040310 ... Death of a Rose myself, it seems 040330 ... birdmad feeling relevant 040330 ... x oh shush aren't your multitudes of admirers on blather enough? no, because you don't like yourself. 040330 ... birdmad that part takes the edge off of it, but all things considered, it's not what i meant 040330 what's it to you? who go blather from