it's_okay Q to lol or even roflyao roflmao :-) and, no, my daughters have not come through today yet, darn them and i haven't been bathing in Nsub2O either, which the one of you who knows anything about davy i know might be thinking SECRETLY! 000110 ... startfires i dont mind. i know not to expect anything. i can't plan you. i can't make you do what i want. i never know what's going to happen. i may never see you agian. i may see you tomorrow. maybe you'll smile and speak and sparkle. maybe you'll ignore me and try to make me jealous. it's okay. i have tried to tell myself for so long that i don't care, i'm using you as much as you're using me. i think it is finally true. everyone else knows how much of an ass hole you are. it's okay. i still think you are irresistable. 001127 ... silentbob i'll let you walk all over me the way you do everyone else. i don't really mind. i am a tool. use me. 001127 ... Raina missing her father... if only i could stop runnig the gamut of obstacle courses i have set up for myself. stop fleeing the responsibilities that bridge my gap between adulthood and the little girl state i just can't leave behind. if only i could walk up those stairs, sneak into the first bedroom on the left and hand you your paper with the tears coming down my face, and you whisper to me... it's_okay 001127 ... sEth Youre late, but its ok. Because you know Ill always be here for you, and love you. 011111 ... Sonya "It's okay" is what I always used to say. It's the universal answer for everything. It's the front I put up when you ask me "What's wrong?" I say "It's okay" even though I may have a frown on my face or tears in my eyes. Sometimes you would accept this answer but most of the time you saw through it. "It's ALWAYS okay" I'd eventually say. So much happiness was riding on the fact that we held our disappointments and sadness to ourselves, refusing to pull down the other person. "It's okay" we'd say. Well now things have turned completely upside down. Hearts are on the line, minds are being warped, and dreams may be lost. "It's okay" we always say. I just have to say it. I'm just not okay, and neither are you. 011112 ... we can still talk but not really. 021201 ... notme i don't matter 040329 ... Syrope i was disturbed at first that i have less & less to blathe...but i've decided that it's_okay. the more active sexy_journal takes away the pressure to confess things here, and i have the most wonderful therapist - my rediscovered cuddle buddy who makes me rethink my definition of "love of my life"...he's the only one who reads my blathes so it'd just be kind of redundant. maybe when the next wave of inspiration hits me...but i think blather & i have a strong enough relationship that we can handle a little break every now and then 040329 what's it to you? who go blather from