headspace jane sometimes the best way to untie a knot is to pull it through. 220318 ... honey_angel_dream_boy I got so high last night I decided to become a teenager again. I went back to read the scratchings on the wall, and I can no longer tell which were mine. I know I was here. I know I wasn't alone. The records are all here. I no longer recognize myself from that time enough to differentiate between the memories and the empathies. I'm trying to coax my inner child out into the light of things having gotten better. But that child is in a dark place, a whole that sucks, and it's a hard head space to leave. I'm scared of falling back in. I always needed more help than I could give. 230823 ... daf We're not any more a constant than our surroundings. Blather's more a constant than we are, and even that's not assured. There is a reason for all of this. It's all going fine and (somewhat unnervingly) according to plan. Find whatever solace, closure or forgiveness there is in that. Do right. Try your hardest. Never give up. 230827 ... daf Oh and..ferret? That's my first guess. 230827 ... honey_angel_dream_boy I was only a bit player on someone else's story, so you weren't supposed to remember me, really. I was 16 when sixteen was sixteen. How was that so long ago? How can everything be 20 years older? Everything?! It seems wrong. 230827 ... daf Did you ever wonder what it would be like to perceive in 4 dimensions? It's supposedly like seeing all moments at the same time; feeling them, smelling them, hearing them. As we limited creatures (of unlimited potential) live through each moment of this gift(or development, or self endowment) we call sentience, storing away the experiences of our lifetimes, we have the ability to play back slices of the past and merge them with the present..perhaps blend them with our hopes or plans for the future. Always in the non-dimensional space of our 3D brains. And maybe that's the God of us giving up a taste of what it is to witness it all at once. Maybe it's the best simulation of 4D perception that our still primitive brain can handle..a gift nonetheless. And there's 55 years of it behind me now and what..30 something of them behind you? Can you see it? Did you? Every moment's showing us something. That's why interaction and movement are so important. Energy exchange is the key to it all. We're being played by time. Like a player piano. It's astounding. To have it end will be bittersweet. Quite a show. 230828 what's it to you? who go blather from